On cloud 9








Do angels fart?

Where would wind come from if they didn't?

C'est qui ton pere?

Nearly 10 past 4.

What goes Bleep! Ping! Bong! ?

A pingpong tournament in a minefield?

Why are your shoes on backwards?

Cause my feet are left handed!!

How do you get an Alien to eat his breakfast?

Tell him it's still living


What do you get if you let an Alien loose in a genetic engineering lab?

Marilyn Manson & Micheal Jackson *Shudder*


Why did God make Crabs?

To stop the bad people from procreating...


How will Loonboy get away with that last answer?

Cos he's very funny and we lurve him

Will Loonboy reach for the bucket after that comment

Not with all of those television cameras watching.

Who's my eagle?

Eddie

How do you make a phantom scream?

Tell him his mask is on the wrong side of his face.




Why don't werewolves like fast food?

It makes the fur way to oily darling!








Why did the Devil go down to Georgia?

Because he was blind, he liked behind and was looking to cop a feel.

What I want to know is, have you ever seen the rain?

actually yeah its commin down , and you wouldn't believe it , it's a sunny day . * this is a smilie of me singing


Where do chupacabra go on holiday?

Benidorm



What if 'fate' gets it wrong?

Then "Karma" will. ......Karma karma karma karma karma chameleon.


Why don't Aleins watch the Cricket?

Hey they invented it to put most of the male population asleep...



What's a Vampire's favourite song?

In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida by Iron Butterfly. They are immortal so they have enough time to listen to it.

Which colour of Interdimensional Vorpal Bunny is least dangerous?

That frosty blue colour with pink spots....... they are the ones that try to gum u to death...


Ok how does Celti know that?

Because Celti is a smart aaaaaa... aaand wise and understanding and sweet and generous and understanding and intelligent and wonderful and understanding lady!


(Did I mention understanding?)




How quick is a shadow?

Quicker then kangaroo in a hula hoop.




Why am I so mental?

It's either genetic or it's drugs.... you flip the coin.


What's a grey alien's favourite game?

Twister!, but with cows entrails

How do Reptilians attract the opposite sex?

They get a good job that pays well.


Is green really green?

not really it's just a figment of your over active imagination



Do Aliens have souls?


like the answer Halo

It depends if they have feet.


do aliens ever get dizzy with the saucers spinning all the while?

Yes, very, and you really don't want to see the inside of them saucers when they stop spinning...


Why are Greys bald?

Because they spend to much time travling in lightspeed.


Is there a Hair Club for Aliens, if so where?

yes it's called-Wigs r us club at hairtopia.






Who is Wolverines hairdresser?

Edward Scissorhands. He also does Wolverines gardening.




How does a ghost know where to haunt?

It tells him in his draft notice.

What colour did your dinner taste?

It tasted kinda orange



If poltergeists can move objects, why can't they do the housework?

Because most of them are Men and they don't "DO" housework


What do you get if you cross a Werewolf with a Bunny Rabbit?

The little bunny from Monty Python and The Holy Grail.


How do you kill something that's already dead?

It has to pray at the alter and then let it find the Thief again.

Zork anyone?

Nah I'll stick to 'diddlee bop', thanks!




Does Nessie get lonely?

No not with Saruman to keep her company, there both almost impossible to photograph.

What is Zork?

Zork iz for zalad. Zpoon iz for zoup.



Do Aliens play sports?

Only Doube Fanucci.

Where do grues come from?