Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever,
smell one another?

Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or
is it still the same old story?

Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar,
the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE
named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around?
We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the
"Chrysler Eagle" the " Chrysler Beagle"?

Dear God: If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human
hears him, is he still a bad dog?

Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions,
hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's,
electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do
humans understand?

Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have
to apologize?

Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must
remember - to be a good dog.

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1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw
it up.

2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like
the way they smell.

3. The sofa is not a 'face towel'.. neither are laps.

4. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.

5. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.

6. I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's
driver's license and registration.

7. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on
the toilet

8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the
coffee table.

9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the
house - not after.

10. I will not throw up in the car.

11. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.

12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he
makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.

Adorable. I'm just glad that we have a cat instead of a dog!