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They're all so too true.

Oh yes....and be quick about it, too...


Most helpful indeed


I always wondered why I couldn't fashionably carry attractive paper bags with groceries in them......


This was a misconception I had to learn the hard way....


reason number 642 that Lila will never fly......

hahaha.......these are great.

Lmao. those are really funny. I like

15. All grocery shopping involves the purchase of French loaves which will be placed in open brown paper bags (Caveat: when said bags break, only fruit will spill out).

I dont even know how many times i've really seen that.

Only in the movies.

24. The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. Nobody will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building undetected.


Hah, that isn't real!! Because the seams of the duct work will fall apart unless each length of duct is supported with weight underneath it.
How do I know this.. Because I have fallen through ductwork.

Of course. It helps them run faster.

[/QUOTE] 31. Plain or even ugly girls can become movie star pretty simply by removing their glasses and rearranging their hair. [QUOTE]

This has always cracked me up. The glasses = hideous equation is ridiculous.

Yep . . Only in the movies.

If anything... It might be ME chanting in there!



OMFG! 30 SECONDS!



Umm... thats a good one.



Wait... wait... hmm... Windtalkers the main Native American guy! HA! YEAH! THAT'S RIGHT! I PROVED THIS ONE WRONG! *pats self on back*



"Hart's War" The Nazi guy kills the leader with a... bullet! *pats self on back again*

Edit: Dang Typo Demons!

Heres another one... you see in the movies

41. A car chase always involves running through a fruit and vegtable stand.

one more....

42. You never see someone is the movie say...'hold on...gotta take a dump'......

These are all so true!

Another thing, in scary movies, how come there is a big group, and they all die but one?

Not only in the movies, but in San Andreas, too!



Just like in BloodRayne!

Mmm.. I remember two more:
43- Dogs always bark at the bad guy.

44- Before killing the hero, the bad guy always tells him what his plans are going to be and why he's doing them, only to give the hero enough time to escape.

Yep your right about that!

The dog only barks at the bad guy and when the bad guy is ready to "kill" the good guy he stops and talks for a while...tells how he was going to get away with his plans....as he talks someone sneaks up behind him and foils his plans....

I like this one!


31. Plain or even ugly girls can become movie star pretty simply by removing their glasses and rearranging their hair.

The princess diary movies....ok.... still doggy faced after the hair and glasses trick!

I can add another one that was on MYTHBUSTERS

Number 40-something: Whenever someone gets shot, even if only by a hand gun, they get thrown back into a window, or on the ground, from the bullet.

Doesn't actually happen. Newtons law still applies. Every action has an equal and opposite reaction, thus if a bullet toppled someone over, the gun would do the same to the gun-holder.

45. (I think.) The m ain character always comes up with witty phrases that people would never say at a time like that. example:

*pushes someone into a volcano and looks at them burn*

non burning person: hmm... that must be a tad hot.

Okay, evidently, alot of people are missing this humour entirely.



It's not difficult to understand people. These are things that ONLY HAPPEN IN MOVIES. So explaining why they would never actually happen is useless, because no one has said anything about them happening in real life. They DON'T, they only happen in movies.

Jeebus, i didn't think it was that complicated.

heres something that only happens in the movies.....the bomb difuser stays trying to defuse the bomb all the way down to 1 second to go..and ALWAYS gets it

Exactly!!

Except in Goldfinger where it reads 007.

Also like how in all sci-fi movies you can hear the sounds of ships in space.
And how shooting a bullet into a gas tank causes it to explode.
(That was disproven in an episode of mythbusters.)

oh that kills me everytime, like in star wars, you hear all these lazers and afterburners...

I serve a customer at work who looks exactly like this. She has odd-shaped glasses and straight hair, but underneat that is an absolute stunner *flashback moment..... Mmmmm*

ok, very very distinctive no. 40something:

The bad guy needs to be killed 2-3 times before actually dying. You stab him, shoot him, electrocute him, throw him to white sharks, bomb him and he has the awful habit to show up when you are ready to kiss the girl and go home for pop-corn. Then, you have to re-kill him with something spectacular and really deadly ie. tie him to a space-going rocket, or a sinking ship (though movie heroes have the ability to get away with it).

Pretty hilarious thread!!! my congratulations!!!!

#50. In car chases, there always seems to be an object right in the perfect place that can be used as a ramp.

#51. Whenever someone drives off a bridge, a barge is conveniently placed right where they would have otherwise met their doom.

It is called 'Costner's law of Cowboy body mechanics'

oh neat. no swearing. well thats cool.

30. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in you room will still be visible, just slightly bluish.


i always wondered... how do they sleep?? i need dark.

52. In a haunted house/ other scary place, you ALWAYS feel the need to look behind that door, even though you know there's something unpleasant behind it.

I got one, In car chases, the car could be a really cr*ppy car and still be faster than the cops, and when driving a jetfighter, the pilot NEVER has red outs or black outs when he reaches like 12 Gs and he hardly ever blows up

New one:

A man and woman cannot work together without an ungodly amount of sexual tension, ultimately resulting in hot, monkey-sex.

New one 2: Smoking is attractive, does not reek, and makes you cool.

I dont mean to double-post, but i thought of this one:

Tarantino movies:

Everyone is a pseudo intellectual who never says anything that isnt really cool-sounding, everyone drops the F-word about 300 times a minute and all have in-depth discussions about comics, music, pop culture in general all of the time, whether planning a heist or attempting to kill one another.

That happens in real life too

Here's one: when a group is fleeing a monster/bad guy thru the woods, the person in the back always trips over a tree root.

I think that they missed one...the good guy/geek ALWAYS gets the girl. Sorry, but that doesn't always happen in real life!

40nrockinon

sure it does. You must not be the good guy, is all.

I have one to add:

In space movies like Star Wars, you can see the lasers being shot. Also, the pilot's of the ships can dodge them.

law number 40-some-odd

-often in warfilms or gunbattles, the need to reload is unnecessary. but if somebody does eventually reload, they should have a long long time ago


The Grenade Law

-often in films, regular Fragmentation Grenades turn into a great magical fireball