A young little blonde girl comes back from school one evening. She runs to
her mom and says:

'Mommy, today at school we learnt how to count. Well, all the other girls
only counted to 5, but listen to me: 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10! That's
good,innit?'

'Yes darling, very good.'

'Is that because I'm blonde?'

'Yes darling, it's because you're blonde.'

Next day, the little girl comes back from school and says: 'mommy, today at
school we learnt the alphabet. All the other girls only went as far as D,
but listen to me: A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K ! That's good,innit?'

'Yes darling, very good.'

'Is that because I'm blonde, mommy?'

'Yes darling it's because you're blonde.'

Next Day, she returns from school and cries: 'mommy, today we went swimming,
and well, all the other girls have no breasts, but look at me!'

She proceeds to flash her impressive 36D breasts at her mom. 'Is that
because I'm blonde, mommy?'

'No darling, it's because you're 25.'
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A lady about eight months pregnant got on a bus, and she noticed the man
opposite her was smiling at her. She immediately moved to another seat. This
time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again. The man seemed more
amused. When on the fourth move, the man burst out laughing, she complained
to the driver and he had the man arrested.

The case came up in court. The judge asked the man what he had to say for
himself. The man replied, "Well your Honor, it was like this: When the lady
got on the bus, I couldn't help but notice her condition. She sat under a
sign that said, 'The Double Mint Twins are coming' and I grinned. Then she
moved and sat under a sign that said, 'Slogan's Liniment will reduce the
swelling' and I had to smile. Then she placed herself under a sign that
said, 'William's Big Stick Did the Trick' and I could hardly contain myself.
BUT your Honor, when she moved the fourth time and sat under a sign that
said,'Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this Accident...I just lost it."
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The teacher told her class the word of the day was 'dictate' and asked who
could spell it. Alfalfa raises his hand and he says d-i-k-t-a-t-e-.
Teacher says sorry that's wrong and calls on Buckwheat. Buckwheat says
d-i-c-k-t-a-t-e. Sorry says the teracher, that's not right.
She calls on Darla and Darla says d-i-c-t-a-t-e. Very good Darla,says the
teacher, that's correct. Now, says the teacher, who can use this word in a
sentence?
Buckwheat raises his hand I know-I know, he says.
OK says the teacher, please use the word Buckwheat.
Buckwheat says: How did my dictate last night, Darla?
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A woman was in a coma. Nurses were in her room giving her a sponge bath. One
of them was washing her private area and noticed that there was a response
on the monitor when she touched her.

They went to her husband and explained what happened, telling him, "Crazy as
this sounds, maybe a little oral sex will do the trick and bring her out of
the coma."

The husband was skeptical, but they assured him that they'd close the
curtains for privacy. The hubby finally agreed and went into his wife's
room.

After a few minutes the woman's monitor flat lined, no pulse, no heart rate.
The nurses ran into the room. The husband was standing there, pulling up his
pants, and said, "I think she choked."

Too bad to be good, but the last one still made me giggle...

They both sounded nasty, yet they were funny!

first couple made me smile

The Buckwheat one made me giggle

The last one.....LMAO

Funny stuff siphis!

disturbing yet worthy of laughs. whatever that means.