A teacher decides that she is going to teach her second grade class a new word today. She tells them that the word is "definitely" and its meaning is "absolute, positive, without a doubt."
She asks the class if anyone can think of a sentence with the word in it. She calls on little Susan who is in the back raising her hand, quite sure of herself.

Susan stands up and says, "The sky is definitely blue."

The teacher replies to her, "Well, that's a good sentence but sometimes the sky is gray, and sometimes its cloudy, and sometimes its red and pink so the sky is not definitely blue. Anyone else?"


Tom's hand flies up and she calls on him.

Tom answers, "The water is definitely clear."

"Well, Tom that's a good sentence but sometimes the water is muddy, and sometimes it's green, and sometimes it's full of seaweed so it's not definitely clear. Anyone else?"


Finally, in the far corner, little Robert slowly raises his hand.

"Yes, Robert?" asks the teacher.

"Can I ask a question, teacher?" Robert replies.

"Yes."

"Do farts have lumps?"

"No. Why do you ask."

"Well, then I've definitely pooped in my pants."

Gross

Yuck! Funny though!

ah dang that's funny

LOL! I got another teacher joke.


Summer break has just ended and a first grade teacher awaits her new students. When they arrive, the teacher starts to talk to them. "Now that you've all gotten out of kindergarden, you should all start talking more like adults. So, let's talk about what you all did over the summer break." she says. A boy raises his hand and says, "I went on a choo choo." The teacher corrects his language and says, "When you want to say 'choo choo', say train instead. Who wants to go next?" A girl raises her hand and says, "I went to see my gradma." The teacher tells her to say 'grandmother' (I think this is how it goes). So one more boy raises his hand and says, "I read a book." The teacher asks what book he read. The boy pronounces, strongly and adultly, "Winnie the sh*t."