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Unexplained Mysteries Discussion Forums > Other > General Off-Topic Discussion > Jokes & Humour
Graylady
ONLY IN AMERICA:

Only in America.....do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.



Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke. !



Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.



Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.



Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.



Only in America......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.



Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.



EVER WONDER ....



Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin ?



Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? !



Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?



Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?



Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?



Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?


Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?



Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?



Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?



Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?


Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?



You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!



Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?



Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?



If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?



If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?


________



hahaha...that is why america is the smartest nation in the world... thumbsup.gif
darkknight
points to ponder
ph34r.gif
well said thumbsup.gif
Yelekiah
QUOTE(Graylady @ Oct 20 2005, 08:30 AM) [snapback]895043[/snapback]

Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

Some I understand, but this one has always irked me.
Great Big Sea
Good stuff. thumbsup.gif
nativechick1989
QUOTE
Only in America......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?


laugh.gif thumbsup.gif
Kryso
QUOTE(Yelekiah @ Oct 20 2005, 02:55 PM) [snapback]895129[/snapback]

Some I understand, but this one has always irked me.

Then you have never seen "Bullet Proof Monk" lol.

QUOTE
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
So true!
Pharoah
Only in America... can a poor black man turn into a rich white women.

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To

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iaapac
Of course we could also consider that in most states, if I saw your camera on the back seat of your car and broke the car window to steal it, I could go to prison for 15 years for burglary but if I stole your car, camera and all, I would get 10 years for grand theft auto.

Odinson
These are hilarious.
PadawanOsswe
laugh.gif

yeah, I wish they would change the hot dog packaging!
343 Guilty Spark
QUOTE
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? !



You know after thinking about that its amazing how its mostly true.
spitfire
grin2.gif

I like it.
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