Data finds absolutely nothing "curious" for an entire episode.
Picard dispenses with his "We mean you no harm" greeting and barks "Get out of our way or we'll kick your ass!"
Data says "Hey-D, what am I, an encyclopedia? Look it up yourself!"
Troi brags "I know something you don't know!"
Troi understands everything the aliens are trying to tell the crew and saves them an entire hour of confusion.
Dr. Crusher easily diagnoses and quickly cures any ailments.
Worf looks under his bed and in his closet before going to sleep.
Any alien threat uses ancient and outdated weapons which are no match for the crew.
Any knife or sword used in a combat scene will actually show blood.
Picard finds some perfectly fitting clothes that he never has to adjust. Q drops by for a visit and nothing exciting whatsoever happens.
Riker will have the same way of saying "Red Alert!"
Upon encountering an evil-looking alien ship, Picard says "We'd better get the hell out of here!"
Some alien isn't after revenge and everyone gets along just fine.
Data keeps blinking "12:00."
Any bizarre happening is in no way attributed to a spatial anomaly or time displacement.
The shuttlecraft/transporter returns the crew to a perfectly normal ship where nothing has happened during their absence.
Troi gripes, "I can't sense a damn thing except your hand on my butt."
Villains wear bright, eye-catching, color-coordinated attire.
Anyone ranking above Captain is perfectly sane and well-adjusted.
Any parties requesting a mediator quickly settle their differences before the arrival of the Enterprise.
A temporal displacement fails to land our heroes in the vicinity of San Francisco.
Every ship in the Galaxy class fails to be destroyed.
When time-travelling, the crew does not worry about altering history.
Time-travel fails to land our heroes at a pivotal point in Earth's history.
A strange, alien infection or plan fails to influence a major character.
A dead or near-death character fails to experience flashbacks of pivotal events in his/her life.
The featured "brilliant' scientist turns out to be mediocre and not very smart after all.
After the entire crew has been rendered unconscious, they begin to wake up at different times.
A minor character or random crewman is abducted for bizarre alien experimentation.
An ambassador is transported to a mediation and actually turns out to be useful.
Shuttlecraft are well-designed, well-built, and very durable under attack.
The strange, innovative alien technology found is actually used at a later date.
Anyone playing a Vulcan does not use the word "illogical" for an entire episode.
The Enterprise finds the missing ship in a normal area of space.
The away team beams down to a planet not threatened by a natural disaster.
Geordi or Data make it through an entire episode without having to "reconfigure," "recalibrate," or "modify" something.
Starfleet tells Picard everything he wants to know at first contact.
The holodecks are built with a remarkable safety feature for emergencies: a password that quits and saves the program in progress, and an ingenious device-a manual door handle so it can be opened from the outside.
The crew begins to worry when Data has read "2001: A Space Odyssey" 3,284 times and begins calling everyone "Dave."
Geordi doesn't gripe about his VISOR.
Picard shows Vash the *real* "Picard Maneuver."
Troi finally snaps and says "You're not paranoid--people really do hate you."
People don't get out of Worf's way when they see him walking down the corridor toward them.
In an incredible bit of genius, Starfleet Command comes to the conclusion that Romulans, posing as Vulcans, actually *are* able to spy against the Federation.
In his family album, Picard discovers that his 20th century ancestors used Bobby Brady's "Neat-n-Natural Hair Tonic."
In a debt of gratitude, Q gives Picard his true hairstyle back: dreadlocks.
"Make it so. No, wait--maybe not."
Geordi tells Picard he'll fix the warp drive "Sometime next week between 9 AM and 5 PM."
The Enterprise visits a new planet where all the inhabitants and computers communicate in Windows 95. Unable to communicate for 2 weeks, the Enterprise departs and never returns.
A major character spends the entire episode in the Holodeck without a single malfunction trapping him/her there.
Picard doesn't answer a suggestion with "Make it so!"
Picard walks up to the replicator and says, "Coke on ice."
Counselor Troi states something other than the blindingly obvious.
Mood rings come back in style, jeopardizing Counselor Troi's position.
Worf and Troi finally decide to get married, only to have Kate Pulaski show up and disrupt the wedding by shouting, "Did he read you love poetry?! Did he serve you poisonous tea?! He's MINE!"
When Worf tells the bridge officers that something is entering visual range, no one says "On screen."
Worf actually gives another vessel more than 2 seconds to respond to one of the Enterprise's hails before arming weapons.
The warp engines start playing up a bit, but seemingly sort themselves out after a while without any intervention from boy genius Wesley Crusher.
Wesley Crusher tries to upgrade the warp drive and they work better than ever.
Data falls in love with the replicator.
Aboard the Enterprise... Pvt. Hudson: "Hey, Data, do the thing with the knife!" (From "Aliens").
The Enterprise receives a Priority One distress call, but Picard says, "Screw them, we're going to Risa for shore leave."
When tranquilizers run out on the Enterprise, Dr. Crusher enlists Worf to smack the patient into unconsciousness.
Worf is on "Klingon Love Connection" : "She slapped me, yelled at me, and threw heavy objects at me. It was a great first date."
After retiring from Starfleet, Deanna Troi starts her new "Empathic Friends Network," with the slogan "We have a vague impression that you need help."
Guinan introduces Worf to *real* warrior's food: milk and cookies.
Worf assembles his little maxims into a book, "All I Really Need to Know in Life I Learned from Combat."

I wish they would have done at least one episode with these things in them.

All great!

Also: A security gaurd other than Worf returns safely from an away mission.

A main character that gets killed stays dead.

These are funny Emmy! I'm going to have to print this and show my boyfriend. He'll get a laugh for sure!

I agree with Al. I wish they could make one eps with these thing in it!

Great Emmy!