anyone got some good ones?

here are mine:

When life gives you lemons, find someone who has vodka and throw a party.

When life offers you lemons - ask for tequilla and salt.

If life gives you lemons throw them at someone... and if they give you apples do the same

if life gives you lemons, throw them at life...see if life will make the same mistake again

When life gives you apples say: Oi! What happened to the lemons?

When life gives you lemons...shut up and eat your damn lemons!

good one

oh yeah the classic: when life gives you lemons, make lemonade

from dilbert
dogbert-"well, look on the bright side, you know, when life gives you lemons, make lemonade"
Dilbert-"I'm allergic to citrus"
"well, look on the bright side, you know, when life gives you lemons, swell up and die"

"When life gives you lemons, build a lemonade stand and make lemonade. Then use the profits of your lemonade business to buy a machine gun. Let's see if life makes the same mistake twice"

"When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice in his eye"

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

Then find someone that life gave tequila.

When life gives you lemons, wipe out every lemon farm, and sell the last 2 lemons for profit.

When life gives you lemons, unscramble and make melons.

some more:
- If life gives you lemons, squeeze the juice into a water gun and squirt it into other peoples eyes

- If life gives you lemons, make lemonade. If life gives you ham, don't make lemonade.

- When life gives you lemons, make lemonade, pee in it, and serve it to the people that piss you off!

When life gives you lemons, tuck them in your bra. Couldn't hurt, might help.

^^I might try that one day

Here are some:

"When life gives you lemons, that means he`s runed out of tomatoes"

"When life gives you lemons, then death gives you onions"

"When life gives you lemons, grab them and eat them before he descides to take them back"

"When life gives you lemons, that means he have drunk a couple of bears too much"

"When life gives you lemons, that means that theire runed out on date"

When life, gives you lemons, you must clone those lemons and make, super lemons.

When life throws you lemons....... well it's your own fault for being so crap!

when life gives you lemons...be different and throw away the lemons for some limes

"When life gives you lemons... throw them at someone who cares"

I'm a wiseass, i know lol I'm glad someone posted this, i almost forgot that famous lil quote, err motto of mine.

well dont throw them at me

i'll try not to ;] lol

im actually out of lemon quotes

thx for posting

when life gives you lemons......then you know Chuck Norris IS NOT your father!

"When life gives you lemons, trade grenades for the lemons, sit back, enjoy your drink and watch the show"

my grandpa LOL

When life gives you lemons, squeeze em and sell them to double your money.

When life gives you lemons, its like crap tables and sevens, lucky as heaven.

When life gives you lemons, be glad, life coulda stomped your nutts, and gave u nothing.

When life gives you lemons, claim that it is the srunken head of Jesus and try to sell it to a museum

When life gives you lemons, ignore it if you'd prefer orange.

When life gives you lemons squeeze it up until you get juice.

When life gives you lemons........Squirt juice in your eye and run around screaming in pain like a madman to the point where the police arrest you for disturbance but you resist arrest and go on a monster rampage riot where the special forces and Marines have to come in but you use your super karate powers to slay all humans of humanity and and and.....Then you rub your eyes....

LOL!!

Very creative. Sounds kinda like Grandtheft Auto.

When life give you lemons, eat them and you will live forever.

I think the devil said the same thing.

He did ?

When life gives you lemons squirt the juice in your eyes and then sue life for more money than you could've made selling lemonade.

If life gives you lemons, ask for the receipt so you can exchange them for oranges

If life gives you lemons, ask life what the hell is it thinking giving you lemons!

If life gives you lemons, ask why it can't give you money instead?

Ye thats his favorite trick... trade material things for your soul, but you can live forever with el diablo.

When life gives you lemons eat them as fast as possible and get huge bragging rights.

bragging rights?

When life gives you lemons, ask why not limes?

Before you read this, please be awared that what I write here, may can be offending to you, and if you love America, seriously, don`t read it... okay here it goes:



When life give you lemons, use them as fuel in flamethrowers to burn down the white house... just like Nick Chaney.

When life gives you lemons, give life something in return; love.

When life gives you lemons, make pancakes

When life gives you lemons, Shove them down his mouth for being so cheap

When life gives you lemons, give him a potatoe

When life gives you lemons, Put a spider ontop of the lemons and shove them into the microwave, the radiation will merge them into a spider-lemon, then clone them and raise your own army of spider-lemons, then breed them with humans to make stronger spider-lemons, then give up and hide in Mexico

When life gives you lemons, run away, your not supposed to take things from strangers

When life gives you lemons, be grateful, you could end up like me and get nothing

when life gives u lemons inject super genes into them and eat them

When life gives you lemons, eat all lemons without pealing them because all the vitamins are in the skin!

"If life gives you lemons; cut them in half and rub them on your nipples..Then charge people to watch you do it!"..

LOL classic!

Thank you Mr. Nelson! As I always say; if life hands you lemons; trade them for limes; then make a pie..Make a Key Lime-Pie; eat it; and use the sugar high to kick some serious *ss!

LOL

Call me kaktus.

Lime pie huh...... mmmmmmmmmmmm.

I like blueberry pie to be honest.

So when life gives you lemons, trade lemons for blueberries, make blueberry pie, aswell as some blueberry jam for grandma!

Ok Kaktus; when life gives you lemons; and you trade them for blueberry pie; you should use that pie to choke Granny and take your inheritance a few years early..
Basically I just want my 2,000 acres and four houses, early..
Don't hold it against me..

No no..........

I wont hold CHOKING POOR GRANNY against you.

Tis such an admirable thing to do

LOL

When life gives you lemmons, give them against Falco Rex to hold on his forehead, and he must stay in the same position for 2 years, to break the old guiness record set by a man in India.

OK;
When life gives you lemons; and you want to break that Indian guys' record..Just recruit all your friends to throw lemons at the Guinness Books' panel of judges until they add you on as the winner..
Why go through all that ridiculous effort for two years, when a few 96mph fastballs with lemons can get you bribed into the history books?

I didn't think i'd post again but hey. lol

What if i don't have any friends Falco? Are you my friend? If you are, i suppose this means you are my only friend.

Inturn....


When life gives you them lemons, toss them yet again to Falco Rex, as he is now recruited to break the Record not for stance, but for most Lemons pitched at a "Guiness Judges Dome Whilst Bribing In Attempt To Get In The Book" record.