I posted about my friend Clive who drowned at the coast in April. Now on the night he died at around the same time the outside light went out near our verandah. We have been staying in the same place for three years and have never had a problem with this light.

Since his death the light behaves oddly, sometimes flickering - sometimes on and sometimes off. We've started talking to thelight, saying OK Clive put it back on now (and it does sometimes come on which could be total coincidence)

I wondered how can I get hold of him, short of a seance? What do you chaps suggest?

With all due respect to you...and my condolences on the loss of your friend....let him go. He lives forever in your memories and sometimes that has to be enough.

Thanks OnyxDk - you may be right. Will think about it - it's very painful to us to think we'll never see him again which makes us want to hang onto him I suppose.

Thank you for understanding where I'm coming from on this issue....I sincerely mean no disrespect....and I understand how difficult it may be to let go, but don't you believe that your friend would want you to move on?.......there is no need to possibly open a whole new can-o-worms for something unnecessary.

I agree. Besides when you talk to him out loud don't you feel like he hears you?

I agree with what has been said here already, at least give it some time when your not in such a vulernable position.

Thanks you guys, I have been mulling over this for some time, now, and have concluded that indeed he would have wanted us to move forward, and it's not fair of us to try to hold him with us when he has gone. Who knows where else he's supposed to be and us hanging on trying to keep him may make him feel upset.

Good memories will have to suffice.

My condolences on the loss of your friend. I know how it is to lose someone close to you. Now for my words on this matter, and please believe me, i am not trying to be a skeptic, nor am i trying to say its not him trying to communicate, I just want to throw out some possibilities.

With the lights acting the way they are, and with you being so vulnerable, is it a possibility of assumption? You missing your friend so much, could make the mind wonder during certain occurances. Maybe before his death, you never noticed the lights flickering the way they are because you never paid attention to something so small.

That sounds harsh but believe me, its not intended for that. I just want you to understand the options.

I had a lot more, however I am sick and can not think clearly, but this I do have to say....As much as you would hate to do so, let go. Let him move on to a bigger and better place. The love that you have for your friend and the feelings you have as far as missing him as much as you do, may keep him lingering. Walk out, and talk with him. Let him know that you do love and miss him, but that its time for him to move on. Memories will live on forever within your heart, just remember that.

If your friend wants to tell you something, he can do so through a good medium. Do not tell the medium anything beforehand. Edit: Or during, for that matter. Best if you hide behind a screen during your visit, really.