I lost someone I loved almost 3 years ago and I can not stop dreaming about him. It is so real! He wants to see me and talk to me and all I can tell him is that he is dead. He haunts my dreams. He always wants to show me things but I am scared. How can I get to the point of talking to him about what he wants. I have also considered that it is me wanting him alive so badly.He was only 35 and I wonder if I am bringing these dreams on myself. It is frustrating me to no end. has anyone had this happen?

My loved one was only 36 when he was killed. First had so many terrible nightmares about him coming back. Only after talking with a friend for hours (about a year later) did I realize it was my own guilt because I didn't demand to see his body. (He was a police officer and there were so many people there along with media that they escorted me out another door). Also wanted to get back to my daughter. The second set of dreams were that I could see him but could never get to him. A crowd or people, cars, something always blocked our path and I would wake up. After a long time I would jot things down that came to mind that would prevent me from seeing him. After a while it came up that I didn't want to see him in my dreams because I was afraid of yelling at him. Our last words were I love you and I wanted to keep it that way. Much time later did I realize I had to let myself be mad. It was natural and I did dream that I told him off. The dreams stopped. Know this is long but I am convinced since your dreams have a consist theme that you might be dealing with an undiscovered issue or maybe he is trying to tell you something. Just a question: Are you afraid of death or maybe afraid that he is not happy? He could be trying to show you that it is okay. Just a thought.

My father died in 2004. I still see him in dreams. Sometimes thedreams even wake me up! One of the things that I keep trying to remember to do is ask him if he can give me the lottery numbers. I know that this is not exactly what you were hoping for in this thread but, try doing something like that. It's called lucid dreaming. I don't know, it might help you, it might not. I'm not an expert.

Dreams are weird what can i say :S

I have had the same problem with a loved one haunting me in my dreams, so real that i could smell her and feel her warmth for 4 years without an end. Sorta like the dreams reminded me what my mind was trying to forget.

She didn't die though... Only her soul died.

If it's really frustrating you the best option is getting alot of new personal inputs imo, but i guess it might be harder than it sounds.

Best wishes.

Usually repetition dreams are about unresolved conflict. You need to resolve in your own mind whatever it was that you didn't get to say or do with this person. Usually if you visualize saying or doing it nightly then the dreams will diminish and eventually completely stop.

Hope this helps. Good luck.

Im sorry for your loss. I lost mine as well in 2002. I found him like that. Anyway, I have had only two dreams of him. Both times he called me on the phone. Both times it was as real as I'm sitting here typing this. I almost forgot the sound of his voice until I heard him talk to me. The first time, he didn't say much just told me to take better care of myself ...the second time, he told me to talk with my youngest daughter, she was needing me at the moment.. and I did. and she was.

I'm sorry to hear of all of you guys that have lost a loved one. The closest loved one I lost was my grandmother. I hadn't seen her in yrs. and she was buried on my bday. I didn't get to make it back to see her before she died. Then my other grandmother died 2 months later.

Hey all,

I lost my father september of 2000, the morning after he died, I had a very powerful dream about him and woke up with him holding my hand. I am a very light sleeper and I fully aknowledged his hand as I was waking up and even several seconds after. I know I was able to communicate my love for him and I still sense him around even to this day.

Other strange occurances around his death, he died on the same exact day my sister died several years before, also my mothers last conversation with him he told her he was going to need his umbrella, she had to keep telling him it wasnt going to rain - It was raining the day of his funeral.

My wife, then fiance at the time kept telling me that day we should visit my father which was odd - it was a difficult time, spending day in and day out at the hospital and then the nursing home for months - I just couldnt that night, and that was the night he died.

Always keep in mind there are other forces at work that we do not know about or even aknowledge. Your best bet is to listen to these dreams and above all communicate your love to them as much and as often as you can.

I don't have any first hand experiences to share but my Grandfather passed away in 1998, i believe. My Grandmother took it especially hard because they were married for 49 years and he had Altzeimers and had to be put in a home. She went to visit him every single day when he was there and he was in the nursing home for a few years.

Well, first of all he died in her arms and that was traumatizing enough. At the funeral she wouldn't leave the casket and collapsed on her way out of the funeral home. She was incoherent, i thought i was going to lose her too. You couldn't even speak to her she was so shaken up that she couldn't even talk and just looked a mess. I felt so bad for her and after the funeral all she did was cry for many months.

She told me about a few incidents that occurred during this time but my memory is pretty cloudy. I know at one point she was asleep or lying down trying to fall asleep and she got really cold all of a sudden. She told me that she felt something lay there hand on her and she woke up and then it went away.

She told me of another in incident where she awoken and she seen my Grandfather. She swears she seen him. She yelled out his name and he dissapeared right before her eyes. I think there was another one where something pulled on her shirt or her covers while she was asleep.

Now, she shrugged all these off as just her imagination or dreams but i have a different theory. I think my Grandfather seen how hard she took it and these little occurances were just him trying to let her know that he was alright and that she had to move on because she pretty much gave up the will to live after he died.

I believe there's some more stories. My Aunt who passed away from cancer was very, very religious and she told us while she was sick that an angel appeared to her and she was never once scared to die. Her dream was to die on Christmas and Christmas morning we got the call.

Finally, i moved in with my Grandmother for a short time because she needed the help because she was in her 80's and couldn't do any work around the house and was also very lonely. She worked for the Foster Grandparents program at a local elementary/middle school working with kindergarden kids.

Well, this was in the winter and she had a long driveway going up to the back porch where she'd enter the house. One day she was running late and i was starting to worry. I heard what sounded like a girl sceaming out a few times and i kept looking out the window but saw nothing so i didn't think anything of it.

Well, a while later i look out the window and an ambulance is in the driveway! It turns out that she fell on the driveway but i couldn't see her because she was infront of the garage which my window was right above and there was also many trees. I felt terrible. If i would have found her out there froze to death it would have broke my heart and for the rest of my life i would have blamed myself for not going outside to check where the screams were coming from.

Here's the mysterious part of this ordeal. She made pretty much a full recovery. She was in her 80's in the blistering cold and anyone else her age would have died in that situation. She said that she thought she was going to die and was terrorfied. She said she crawled down to the bottom of the driveway in hopes that a passing car would see her. By the time they found her she had hypothermia, she was coered in frost, trembling and didn't know anything that was going on. They rushed her to the hospital and luckily were able to save her.

Now, i was home during all of this. She later told me after she got better that a young couple had seen her lying there. Covered her with a blanket and called an ambulance for her. Funny part is i never heard a car in the driveway nor seen anyone or heard any people until i looked out the window and seen the ambulance. The couple was nowhere to be found and my Grandmother looked frozen, she looked dead to be honest and wasn't even speaking. Now, i find it strange that the couple would call an ambulance and just leave. She didn't there names either.

Now, it's my theory that there was never any couple but those were actually angels that saved her life. I was home all the while this happened. I still feel terrible about not finding her sooner but there's no way that she should have survived. I know i would have heard a car come up the driveway or even a car leaving the driveway. I heard nothing up until the ambulance arrived. She put an ad in the paper trying to find the couple so she could thank them but it was never answered. I'm positive that they were angels who saved her life. It's giving me the chills just thinking about it again.

I woke up to my father calling my name. My first thought was he come to visit. He lived right next door and got up really early to drink coffee sometimes. I woke up and went into the kitchen looking for him. He wasn't no where. Something heavy was on me, I can't explain the feeling of it. Almost as if I couldn't breath. I felt urgency. I took off down to his house, the door was locked. I looked in the window to his bedroom, and it looked as if he was asleep. I knew then something was wrong... he should have already been up he was an early riser. My rott was behind me and nearly tripped me up going back up to the front door to break it in..that dog was acting nuts-- ( im a girl, but I can break down a door in adrenaline as I found out) I ran in and both fire alarms were on (oddly)... and that's when I went into his bedroom. Anyway, many other things happend that was odd.... things that will never be explained. He knew he was going to die. He told me on wed. He died on fri. He was supposed to be in the "best health" he'd been in for years.... he knew without knowing...

I think everyone who loses someone they are close to dreams about them at some point, if for no other reason than that we miss them. My Daddy died in 2004. I dreamt of him a lot shortly after he died, but as time passed, it's less frequent, and the strained feeling isn't nearly as bad. And by strained I mean, on some subconcious level in the beginning, I knew he was gone, but I'd see him in my dream, and I'd panic, I KNEW I only had so long to talk to him, or hug him, or just be near him, because as soon as I woke up, I knew he wouldn't be there. The strange thing is, he died early in the morning while my Mom was getting ready for work, and I was having a dream about him when my sister knocked on my front door to tell me he was gone. The dream I was having of him was a good one, in real life he'd been very sick for a very long time, and was to the point where he was unable to even stand up to go to the restroom or get out of bed by himself, but in my dream, he was still sitting in his favorite over-sized rocking chair (he was 6 foot 7 and about 250+ lbs), but he looked healthy, and he was the healthier man I remembered from when I was younger. I was pregnant with my 2nd daughter, and our house had burnt down just a couple weeks before, without going into great detail, my life was a complete mess, my oldest daughter had been burnt in the house fire (it had started in her room because of a spaceheater and, miraculously, her burns were minor, but any parent knows that just the thought of what COULD HAVE happened can make you just as crazy as what DID happen), I had found out that I was pregnant with my 2nd child a few days before that and, after the house fire, I was convinced I had lost her (again, any Mother knows that you KNOW when there's life inside you, and also when it's gone). On top of that, my Dad's health was deteriorating quickly, and I knew he was dying - he had even told me before it happened, and that he was not afraid, and I shouldn't be either). In my dream, like I said, he was healthy - not young and running and playing, but healthier than he had been in years - and he told me again not to be afraid, that he wasn't in pain anymore, and that I would be fine. Then, in my dream still - right before my sister woke me up by knocking on my door - he touched my stomach, and told me again that everything was going to be okay, and that he loved me, "more than life itself." This didn't strike me as odd, this was a term he used often, with everyone he cared about.

I only dreamed about him once again before his funeral, our family was gathered in a strange house, and he sat quietly in the corner of the room, sitting in that rocking chair, just watching everyone. He never spoke, he was just a presence. For 2 and 1/2 weeks after he died, I still had that dead feeling inside, and was still convinced that I had lost my baby. My world had crumbled, my house had burnt down and I almost lost my oldest daughter, my Daddy had died, I thought I had miscarried, and I was spending so much time and energy trying to be strong for my Mom, who was a lot more distraught than I was. I didn't tell her I thought I had miscarried, in light of everything else at the time. I told her everything, and not telling her something as important as that took it's toll on me too, I had a nervous breakdown at work (very out of character for me, I'm usually not an outwardly emotional person, and it's rare that anyone has EVER seen me cry). That night, I was at my Mom's, my sister and aunts, who were here from out of state to be at my Dad's funeral and be with my Mom were there, my other sister was there, and all of our children were there - and it started to hail. It was the middle of February, so it wasn't that odd, except that when we talked about the hail to anyone who wasn't there that night, we got this "deer in the headlights" look - it hadn't hailed anywhere else. That night, I dreamt about my Dad again, and that "paniced" feeling I was talking about was there - I remember thinking, "There's not much time, you have to hug him and tell him you love him." I never made it to him in my dream, but he smiled at me. I woke up to my baby moving inside me - not just the little "gas bubble" flutters either - she kicked HARD.

Anyway, sorry about the long post, but I think there's a lot to be said about "unfinished business" or dreaming about someone you've lost because maybe, that's their only way of letting you know they're watching over you. Personally, I wish I could dream about my Dad more often, I miss him terribly.

But watchstopper - if it was someone you lost, why are you afraid of him showing you things in your dreams? Isn't it possible that he's just trying to help you with something, or warn you (hence the negative feelings) of something, trying to keep you from getting hurt? I hope you don't think I'm trying to be negative, I'm just saying that I would think if you two were close at all in life, he wouldn't intentionally do something to scare you now. Just my thoughts though.

Thanks for sharing!

I dunno if it's anything paranormal. It could be.

I lost my step-dad in a rather horriffic way while I was sitting my final uni exams in May. Still have dreams that everything is back to the way it was before. Sometimes I know it's a dream (mainly because he's alive in the dream) but I wish I wouldn't wake up from it.
In fact i did have dream last night. He was in the kitchen talking to my mum, and I came through. I remember being shocked, because I knew he was dead, and he just looked at me, with a sad expression on his face; an expression (or indeed emotion) he never used while he was alive. I think he was just back to make peace and "tie up some loose ends" as it were, because you see, he was self-employed. It was a really melancholy feeling throughtout the dream, and it was dark, like the lights weren't on for some reason, while it was dark, or dusky, outside.

RKD

l have also lost a few loved ones first was my grandfather in 1999 , then my best friend in 2001 , my father in 2004 and my uncle in may 2006 .
l have dreams of all of them from time to time , it seems that when l'm feeling lonely or just feel like l have the blues that l dream about them , almost like they are saying that they are watching over me through the dreams .

I am new to this. I dream alot. And one night, I dreamt that my dad was waiting to be put asleep by the doctor and it was the end for him. I hug him, told him I love him, and cried alot in my dream. I woke up, went to the bathroom and got back to sleep. I started to dream again, and this time I was holding my dad's hand, and we were on a road, we hugged again and I ask him " Will you watch over me?" and he just smile and went away.

The next day, he went for an operation and died on the table.

He past away sept. 07, 2007

I keep dreaming about him regurlaly. In my dream, I know Im am dreaming. I tell him everything I have to say, any problems Imight have. But last night, I dreamt that we were at his house. Again, in my dreams...I knew I was aware that I was in dreamland.

My father was there, and he couldn't understand why we were selling his truck, and his camper and so on. And I told him "Dad...you died on the operation table...we had a funeral for you. and I also explained to him why happened during the operation. But at the same time, I was like " Oh my god! Your alive! " and hugged him.

He was really upset and couldn't understand what was happening. He was still wondering what was going on.

I don't know what I have to do....maybe my dad is stuck in the earth and didn't go towards the light and at the same time maybe its just a dream....

I hope somebody can make me understand....this is why I join this group.

Thank you

my grandmother died a year ago. i was the one who cared for her that is why i was very close to her. she always tell me that i am her favorite granddaughter. after she died, i always dream about her. i dreamed of her two weeks in a row... it was really odd coz most of my dreams were all nightmares. i can't explain why i was so scared then i'll wake up and be afraid some more because i realized that she's is really no longer with me.
it was hard because she's the only family i have since my parents are working overseas.

when i started picking up the pieces and moved on with my life. the nightmare stopped. but recently, i had this strange dream. i was lying in my bed sleeping then i felt that someone from my back hugged me. i panicked at first and then found out that it was my grams asking me how are things with me and that she missed me. she even thanked me for caring for her and told me she loved me and will always watch over me. i told her that i am happy to see her again and that i love her too. i even told her to wait for me when its my time to leave this world already. she laughed and told me not to think of negative things because im still young and will have a long life to live. i was so happy with our conversation. she seemed happy and healthy. she even showed me her dress coz she is wearing pink. i think it was a long dream coz i can't remember the rest of the things she told me. but i remembered her voice and her hugged. it was all very clear. in the middle of the dream she just vanished and i woke up.

i agree, it may not be a conflict, but you are not letting yourself "feel" something that you should. let yourself go through it to get it out of your system.

hello watchstopper, i had a similar expirience, but it only happened once, about 2 weeks after my dog died (golden retriever, loyal and faithful, wouldnt hurt a fly) the dream took place in a field of green garss and he was there, and he sat down in front of me and i just started patting him, his fur felt so real, it helped me a lot in my troubled time.

I dn't have much to add to this topic...but did just want to say that I have had this happen with my beloved dog, Maggy, who passed away a couple of years ago after her being a close companion since childhood...about 11 years I had her.....and several months after she passed I thought I had accepted it, but I started to have constant dreams of her death....over and over....she actually had to be put down, which still haunts me and is making me chke up while writing this....I just keep remembering how much she didn't know what was going on and how much I really didn't want to put her down, but her death was inevitable and would have been a very painful way to go.....I don't understand why I had those nightmares, but they have stopped....and I don't know what made them stop either.

I also had a dream several weeks ago that was partially lucid, in that I knew I was dreaming, but wasn't in control of what happened.....but in the dream my grandmother, who I only 'met' as an infant, spoke to me and loved me like I have never felt loved by my immediate family....it was a very reassuring dream.

I don't know reasons to give you why, but what most people have responded with...it probably is an unresolved conflict or unacceptance on your part that they have past since they were so young...you could be angry, very understandably so. I'm no expert on the physical loss of loved ones..

I too believe it's very natural to dream about loved ones once they have passed over, especially in the first year or two after, and I'm certain that sometimes they just want you to know they are ok.

My father passed away last year in the summer, age 40 due to alcoholic liver disease. It was very unexpected, even though we knew he drank too much. I think it was a bit of a shock to him as well. I can't explain why I think this really. He passed away about 7am before me, my two younger sisters, brother and boyfriend could make it to the hospital one last time.

I havew had several dream since then. When I returned to my flat after being at the hospital that day I could smell him... Particularly in the bathroom and the bedroom. It was a very distinctive smell, that I remember from when he used to drive me and my siblings to school in the morning. It was pretty comforting, but I couldn't take it in much.

I've had dreams where I've cried on him, hugged him, shouted at him etc. He never says much he just has this deep, sort of sad/empathetic look in his eyes which he had the year before he died, he has said "I love you" in dreams though. Another odd thing was all of the year before I kept telling my partner how worried I was about him. I didn't know why. I thought I was worried about him in a more psychological way, as in worried about how depressed he was. But it was those sad eyes that instilled this worry in me. Everytime we'd say goodbye, the year before he died he looked so wide eyed and sad, and it made me feel quiet and confused for hours after, like I just wished I could comfort him.

One particular dream I had was kind of sweet. He was in my mum's living room by the tv with a glass of what looked like cider. I remember going over to him and crying on his shoulders and saying sorry. Again he didn't say much. I remember then taking the glass of cider and throwing the liquid onto the carpet. He started laughing, and so did my mum, who was behind us. We kind of found it sad, and poignant yet funny at the same time.

my youngest sister hada dream, I guess she was about 6 or 7, very soon after the funeral. During it she said he came to her and picked her up, and said several things to her. One thing was that he thanked her for waving at the door of intensive care (she was upset she hadn't been allowed to go in.) He also said to her 'I sent the boat for mummy.' (on the day of the funeral the wake was held at a riverside pub as he loved fishing on the river. The only boat that pulled up was one called Mary Jane, my mother's name.) he also said he had met her grandad (my mums dad who died before all the grandkids were born) and was with bubbles (a kitten that had gotten run over before my little sis was born.) he also said to send his love to everyone, which was a phrase he used a lot. This dream soothed us all for quite a while, as you can imagine. For a while after Jennie said she could talk to my dad when she wanted to. I don't think my mother encouraged it though, so she soon forgot about it.

I don't know about anyone else, but whenever I dream of a lost loved one I may wake up a little nostalgic, but the overriding feeling is one of gratitude, that I got to see and perhaps even feel someone I thought I had lost. It feels that real to me.

Again i think it is normal to dream about a loved one. they are still in our thoughts and therefore our dreams. Out of family members that have passed on the only one i dream of often is my mother. Uaually though she appears if in the dream i've done something i shouldn't and sooner or later she turns up to tell me off. A dream can include anything that is within your mind or on your mind and i find my dreams of my mother are as vivd as my nmemories of her.

i lost my aunt 2 years ago on this day. we were EXTREMELY CLOSE.
for the first few months after she died i drempt about her all the time. i would wake up in the middle of the night because i heard her call my name.
i would feel her presence around me alll the time.

the day after she died, i was home alone doing the wash to take on the trip to go to her funeral. my mother and most of our family had already left because they got word that she wasnt going to be able to hang on much longer. i was about 14 at the time and my mom wouldnt let me go because she knew it would brake my heart to see my aunt in such a deteriorating state. but she died and there was NO way i was missing her funeral. so i was in the hallway where my washer and dryer unit is located and all of a sudden, as i was reaching down to grab the soap, i got the vibe that my aunt was walking through the hall, so i was about to turn around and say hello but then i realized, wait, my aunt is died last night? then i could see something or someone, my aunt, walk by behind me and the hairs on the back of my neck stood straight up. and i about went crazy. i FREAKED out. i ran outta the hall, grabbed the phone and ran outside my house and immediately called my father. i was in such a pannic state that it took me about 4 times to dial the number right. i finally reached it and told him what happened. i was so scared to go back into the house. idk why tho. and it made me sad bc i was afraid to come in contact with my own beloved aunt. the next few months i didnt go to the bathroom in the middle of the night haha. i was too afraid to see the spirit or feel my aunt in my presence. i would run through that hall and get to the other side as fast as possible. ya see, my aunt lived in TX, but she had the type of job where she could work any where she wanted to. so she decided to come out to san diego to be close to family. so she lived in a studio hotel room untill she found a lump in her breast and found that she had cancer. she started doing chemo and lived with us for about 6 months until she transfered to my gpas then back to her home in texas about a week b4 she died. i think she knew she was going to pass.

about 3 months after she died i went to a summer camp. we took a camp picture like most do. my grandfather picked me up and took me to his house to stay for a day or two. i had my stuff in the back bedroom, my aunts old room when she lived there. i had my suitcase on the bed. i was home alone and i took out my picture to see it. i had it rolled up in my bag with a rubberband. i looked at it for a few moments then rolled it back up and put it back between the the suitcase itself and the flap to hold it in place. i went to take a shower. when i returned to the room, my camp picture was laying flat on the bed in a position as if some one was sitting at the part where the pillows just sittin there lookin at the picture. it was so weird becuase no one was home and i remembered whre and how i left it. plus it was completely flat, not rolled up how it was. iknew it was my aunt and i just remember smiling.

i would never sleep in that room untill just recently. you couldnt get me near that room. but since so much time has passed i dont even care anymore.

anyhoo the whole reason i looked this up was bc i had a dream about my aunt last night. it was the first one in a LONG time. whats so strange is that it was 2 years ago last night that she died. FREAKY. she died the night of april 7 but since the time difference is a bit different then texas its the 8th bc it happened about 10 mins past midnight. i didnt even realize tho. like i thought yesterday was the 5 or 6 i didnt even know it was exactly 2 years.

what makes no sense to me is what my aunt said. she called me and she said we hafta meet up. and i was like? uhm excuse me your dead? how are you here your dead? and she was in a car and i heard a man in the background. i was liek whos that? and she told me that it was her boy friend. now this was very odd because my aunt was a lesbian. so i said to her, BOY FRIEND?? what do you mean boy friend. and she said thats how im here, its what i had to do to get here to see you. i didnt understand. when i told her she was dead she said dont worry about it. she was verry nonshalant too like a different attitude that ive never seen her posses before. anyhoo i dont think we ever even ended up meeting.

idk i just thought it was weird what she said. this dream was very real unlike any other dream ive ever had about her.

anywayss sorry for writing so much i just wanted to share and thought maybe some1 would be interestedd.

:]]

Welcome to UM mushroom.

As to your story I have no comment.