Okay, here's my crappy story of religion.

So basically, I was raised a Roman Catholic, and at about 13 or 14 I started to drift away from it. I didn't like to get told what to do--I was spiteful of law and order, and I felt stupid believing in something that couldn't be proven by science. I drifted further and further until one day that I decided there was no God. Still, I thought that this was a very important topic and that I should put a lot of thought into it. So I did. And what I came up with was that there can't be a God, or at least not a caring God, because there is so much suffering in the world. Plus, the church is just out for our money and taking us for suckers, and shoot, I thought that the big bang theory made a lot of sense.

So, throughout highschool I was an athiest, though not too outspoken--mainly because I respected Christianity (I don't know why so many athiests hate Christians, it's just silly really), which seems like the main target of athiests...

Anyway, when I got to college I really started to question my athiestic beliefs. It didn't make sense to me that morals are simply social norms or that morals were subjective. I also really didn't like the self-centeredness of athiesm. When I really thought about it, the scientific method can only go so far. It's way too easy to just say that newton's laws are indeed fact, and that the big bang theory is proven true and can't be wrong, but in the end it always comes down to faith--nothing we can do will bring us back to the big bang, we can only speculate and try and make predictions. So, I've turned back to God.

Anywho, I'd like to hear other stories, either turning to God or turning away from God, please feel free to share!

Thanks CP for sharing your story here.

I was 21 when I stepped away from the Roman Catholic religion I was brought up with. There were things that did not add up in my mind and I did not like the way the people were manipulated with fear and guilt.

So in a way I was nothing for many years. I did not have the answers. I like you CP respected the way others thought and felt but realized I wanted more for myself. I always talked to myself about matters of right vs wrong for me. This lasted about 46 years for me when one day I wanted to really understand what was going on in my life. I would not say I was slow exactly, it was just that there was nothing that required drastic improvement in my views about life until then. So in 1989 I made a committment to my spiritual awakening and I have not looked back since then.

I have come to appreciate every journey is unique and dearly loved. The heart ache, violance and injustice has its purpose. In my view, each of us is a spiritual being that has incarnated on earth with a plan and a desire. Actuall any number of plans and desires.

So that in a nut shell is my story.

John

I believe in God, but I care nothing for him or church. I cannot go into a church because it gives me the creeps and I can't stand the smell. I would always find myself debating with people, trying to sway them, but to no avail.

I think morals are important whether you believe in a God or not, if you don't lead a decent life for a God, then at least lead one for the betterment of yourself and the rest of mankind. I believe there is a higher source out there, I don't know whether it controls everything or whether it is only the source of all matter.... and the rest is left up to randomness. I don't believe anyone will ever know.

I think that most believers of God drift away from him at some point in their lives. Plus, at such a cynical time in our world, it is hard to believe that there's a God. I've been raised Christian, and will most likely stay Christian for the rest of my life. However, I agree that churches can't always help to further a religion. It seems more that they put limitations on religion, which kind of defeats the purpose. That's just some of my ideas on it though.

Thanks CP great story!

I have goosebumps from it because it's almost like mine and I just love to have a fellow believer back on board. When I was about 13 or 14 I began to question if GOD was real, somewhat because of this very board.

The "Big Bang" didnt really make much sense to me at the time how could a bang create life, and earth as we know it. At the time I didnt believe in GOD, or the "Big Bang" but I didnt know what to believe either.

At this time it was my time to make a choice, and thankfully I chose GOD and to this day I ask him to forgive me everyday for ever doubting his existence.

That made me sick to my stomach, not that you cant stand church, or you hate the smell? But the fact that you would try and sway somebody from a religion.

Since it's been a while, I'll share my own story about one of the triggers that turned me into an athiest. To be honest, I can't actually remember if I've ever posted it or not, but mleh...I'm bored, I've had a long day at work, and it feels like one of those moments when Grandma Sera calls the little younglings to listen to one of her stories about bygone days.

*eases herself into a rocking chair*

I seem to remember that when I was younger I believed in God in much the same way that I believed in Santa. I was told he existed, I was told stories about him, and I was far too young at this point to question anything that was shoveled into me. In fact, if I hadn't questioned it, the chances are I would simply have gotten so into the habit of believing it, I still would today.

I was indoctrinated as it happened not by my parents...my father is an athiest, and my mother agnostic, so I wasn't really exploded to religion at home...but by my primary school. It was simply a part of the day, the entire school heading for the assembly hall, singing hyms, going thruogh a prayer, and being told God is this and God is that. Whether or not this still going on in Primary Schools or not (and I feel very strongly that it shouldn't), I don't know...but I do know it led me to believe that God existed.

The day of my epiphany came at around...hmm...I couldn't have been primary three yet...so I'd say somewhere around five years old, maybe six. We'd been going through out ritual brain washing program in school, which had included a line in one hym that stated that God would 'place out his hands to keep me from falling' or some such thing. Like everything else we were told, I believed this...until, on the interval after singing that, I ended up falling over and hurting myself.

I skinned the palms of my hands pretty badly, and I remember sitting there wondering why God didn't help me like the hym said he would...from the mind of a tiny child, this didn't seem like an unreasonable request from a being that's supposed to be all powerful, and that's supposed to love you unconditionally. That was certainly the moment that broke whatever belief I had in God, and led me to start questioning things. You could say that I started very, very early.

A decade and a half later, and I'm still an athiest. I'm probably still going to be an athiest on the day I die. Religion, to me, simply doesn't have any answers...and the answers it does have don't stand up for long. I've become quite convinced that there isn't a God, and I'm more than content to live my life on this premise.

I'm happy to live my life, and take my beliefs, from the evidence around me. If something were to be presented to me that would prove God's existence...or even suggest it for that matter...then I would probably take it in my stride. But in order to find truth, you have to find questions first, and religion tends to claim to have already answered all the questions.

I have been through similar struggles. I left the church when I was about 13 because the politics and corruption I saw disgusted me. I went through an agnostic stage, I felt there was a God but did not know what he was or which religion if any had gotten it right.

When I was 17 I had someone reach out to me in a selfless and evangelistic way. They did not preach, they did not tell me I was wrong or that I would go to hell if I did not believe what they did. As silly as it might sound they just helped me out. Someone stopped to help me change a flat in the middle of the night in a thunderstorm in a not so nice part of town. After we finished I asked the guy why he stopped to help and he gave me a little pocket new testament and said if I read it I would start to understand and then he left.

That was the beginning of a long journey for me. It eventually lead me to enter the ministry. The requirements for that with the faith I am in are not easy. I needed an undergraduate degree and then four years in a masters program in seminary. And what shocked and disgusted so many of us in seminary was the corruption and politics that had ingrained itself into the church. We had to make a choice as individuals, we could get frustrated and quit, or finish and try to work fix the problems we saw in the church and lift up the biblical principles we felt were important. Namely charity, love and forgiveness to all, not just the people who we liked or those who fit what might be considered a normal person.

It is a struggle each day and the most tragic thing that I see in the ministry is the harm done by the organized church to so many. It is a sad truth that the church of this world has done much in Gods name that is ungodly.

That's good to see.
There are few things in this world that get on my nerves as much as someone who has a change in their world view and is then determined to go tell all the people with the view they left how stupid they are.


the smell? only the church I've recently been going to recently had any kind of smell (incense ftw) other than the old smell all older buildings have.

You seem like a preacher that I could actually like, preacherbill. I've liked your posts that I have read so far, you are far different from the evangelical preachers that I have encountered as you have a more rational understanding of the Bible (vrs fanatical and literal interpretations) and you are honest about the corruption and ungodly actions that have been performed in The Creators name.

It is actually true that Churches do tend to have a somewhat musty smell...strangely, the same smell is often found in a lot of public buildings. In churches and libraries it's probably most apparant because there's so little sound (when there's not a service that is). You use all five senses to memorise something, but if one of them is lacking, you're more likely to remember the others more vividly.

Personally, I quite liked the smell. But that's neither here nor there. I've not been in a church for a very long time indeed.

Oh, you people amuse me. You say that you don't believe in God because there is so much suffering in the world? Let me pose a question to you- do you expect your parents to constantly intervene in your lives and keep anything bad from happen to you? Of course not, because you have to live your own lives- Why would expect God's stance on the matter to be any different?

If I was about to die, or suffer grevious harm, I certainly WOULD expect my parents to do whatever they could to help me. However, my parents are not all powerful deities, capable of tipping the balance of life or death at their whim. If God does exist, and we are indeed his children, you'd think he'd feel some kind of obligation to protect us, especially since he's the geezer demanding we worship him or burn in hell. It's sort of like expecting to get paid without ever turning up for work.

However, that's a different conversation, for a different time. My own personal disbelief in God, although triggered by a failure to intervene on my behalf, has been fueled by a variety of other factors that I won't really go into...suffice to say, it wouldn't be on topic.

I came by christianity though neighbors. My father was an atheist, and my mother was an agnostic, when people say there are no atheists in a fox hole never met my Dad. I ask him if he thought about god when he got shot, he said "Hell no I was to busy fighting for my life." My Mother us to send us to baptist bible camp in the summer to give us something to do and get us out of her hair. If she had really understood brainwashing she wouldn't have done it. Jesus loves me yes i knoo.....oh make it stop...) About 19 I had a class in world religions and that was the end of my christian era. I decided on Buddhism. That only lasted until need for a steak out weighted the need for nirvana. I did make if about two years. I dropped spirituality as the needs of wife and kids took over.
When my wife became ill, we moved to the Ocala National Forest so she could spend her last years living in the country. I didn't know I was moving to a spirit place. I should have known when I notice the ravens. It is the only place east of the Mississippi that has ravens. My life changed there, I would never be the same person again. Mother Earth called me to a new Path with an old Water Oak. I walk around for about a year thinking I had gone insane. I moved back to SW florida to help my Mother after my wife passed. I hooked up with an old friend, I told him what happen and my feeling of insanity. He told me to look into Paganism. It was there I found I wasn't insane after all I was a Pagan. After much searching for a match to what the tree had revealed to me I settled on Druidry. I am very happy with my Path and I am very glad I am not insane.

Whoa! God isn't the one that demands that you believe in Him, It's His misguided believers that are guilty of that.

So you are not a christian. The bible is very clear if you don't believe in the god of Moses you will be punished in some way. Not that it matters to me, because there is no hell a god can devise worse than the hell I have lived in this life.

If you knew anything of my past posts, you would know that I am indeed a devout Christian!

I wouldn't bet on that, as life can always become worse, and burning for eternity would beat out whatever suffering you have experienced. However, I don't think christian version of hell exists as I can't believe a spiritually higher being would condem someone to such an existence. I would not do that to the lowest human that has ever lived or any animal either. Since I am sure that The Creator is more compassionate than me, how could he/she do such a thing?

Thank you for sharing your story darkwind. It was sad, but beautiful also. I am glad that you found your calling, you undoubtfully had a powerful spiritual experience and it brought you to a belief that you are comfortable with. Why and how could The Creator be angry with that? I have a higher opinion of The Creator than most people give him/her credit for.

Most people have not experienced pain like I have. Pain so bad you pass out then wake up and go through it again over and over. The nurses in the hospital thought I would die from the pain or at least go insane. Maybe I did, I saw my God and Goddess that night.

It is important to remember that though the evangelical christians may be the loudest they are not the only christians out there and according to many of them i am not even christian. Just fyi for anyone interested i am a minister in the Evangelical Lutheran Church. It is a fairly mainline protestant church.

Sounds extremely bad, that I do not doubt, and I am sorry that you experienced this. But it ended right. Burning for eternity has got to be worse, as it never ever ends. Nothing with an atom of goodness would do that to any soul, much less a loving creator. It is the fear mongers within religions (just the bad or mislead ones) that have invented hell to control others and benefit for themselves. Most religions have moved away from this concept of hell and instead have described it as being a seperation from God, but sadly there are some who still hold this view of hell.

YES!!! I have waited years to hear from someone who believes in God yet doesn't believe in hell. I have been preaching this Word for a long time- it's good to know that I'm not the only one!

Hmm, hell comes from the fact that people are afraid of the reprocusions that life gives them. Some day, that force they call The "Holy Spirit" shall be gone and unknown to humans, there will be in for reprocusions. I want society's greatest fault (itself) revealed.

I have MS, it comes and goes.
In my religion, if you don't believe in the Gods and Goddesses it doesn't matter. Each life is a learning process, each life is different. That is why we don't witness; when you are ready you will come to it as I did. The Gods are patient, they have an eternity.

I am not a christian either by their definition, but I have based a lot of my philosophy in life on the words of Jesus, at some points in my life anyway. I went to Sunday school and learned the the basic concepts that Jesus was trying to convey, loving God and others, and the concept of forgivness. I filtered out a lot of the rest. Later in life, I stopped going to church. I later read of eastern philosphy (The Book by Alan Watts was very influential on my thinking). After many years passed, I began to loose my faith in any god, or at least no longer really thought about it. When I was 35, I had a paranormal/spiritual experience which turned my life upside down. That in a way, reaffirmed my belief in The Creator and/or in beings of the spiritual realm. I still think for myself though, I pick and choose from different religions what makes sense to me. I know that I haven't gotten it all right, but I would rather be wrong and believe what my mind and heart tells me than be wrong by believing what some else insists must be true. I try and learn from all religions, but I question them also. I believe that the experiences of life, both good and bad, are learning experiences that shape what I truely am. So I am not angry with The Creator for the bad in the world. It is sad that suffering must be part of this learning experience, but I have faith that there is a good reason for this. I am glad that my faith in The Creator has been rekindled, my soul felt very empty without this belief. My concept of The Creator is so much different than what I was originally taught, but love and forgiveness are still the key, despite the hurts in life.

I am sorry for you illness Darkwind. I understand better now your pain, it must have been and at time be terrible. But I am also glad for and in some aspects envy your spiritual life. Life on Earth is temporary, but spiritual life is forever. I believe we evolve spiritually through life events, so our concepts are very similar. Whether a person sees The Creator as one or many does not matter much to me, despite the words of the fear mongers. I am certain there are beings in a higher spiritual realm. And I believe that we have come and will return there one day, hopefully more spiritually evolved.

I have anxiety attacks (social) myself, and have had ones so bad I thought I was having a seisure. A recent one was like a lighting bolt through the brain, very painful, but luckily brief. My nerves are still jingling. But that does not stop me from loving people or The Creator.

I love all beings of good on the higher spiritual realm, so send my love to them for me Darkwind. I don't think The Creator will mind

I am glad that pleases you, it is good to share beliefs with someone else and I imagine you must be frustrated at times. I am not sure that you and I believe in God exactly the same way, as my beliefs are complicated and are often in flux, but I do believe in a loving Creator and I don't believe in hell at all. Hell is a very sick concept. I hope this doesn't change the way you feel.

Not at all. My beliefs are also very far from simple- for I believe in different aspects of many religions. I do in fact believe in an all-powerful God, just not one that is as involved in our affairs as many would like to believe.

Why would he not in a sense let them die, and go to a much better place? A place where there is no pain and suffering. He doesn't demand, he ask's us to worship him, if we dont its our perogative.

Are you suggesting that a parent who doesn't protect their child, therefore, is a good parent, so long as their excuse is "Oh, I let them die so they'd go on to a better place."

Cant be disproven by science either.

It is much easier to not believe in something that seems quite far fetched then to believe in it.

However, this discussion probably belongs somewhere else. This thread was started to ask people about their walks with religion or without it. Just saying...

That's great, I guess we think along similar lines. I like your avatar by the way. One of my favorite symbols. Some religions have more appeal to me than others, but I try to respect everyone's beliefs, as long as they are not harmful. It gets so tiresome people using religious differences to justify war. I guess that's part of the reason I bother posting. If I do a drop of good by posting my ideas, at least it's more benefical than watching tv.

Thanks! I might like your's better if I knew what it was.

It is a mandala that I found online, I was looking for some mandalas to post on another thread about art, when I ran across this. It doesn't mean anything, just something to meditate on.

interesting story, heres mine

i was born and baptised Roman Catholic, at about 10 or 11 years of age my family desided that Roman Catholics went against their own teachings, so we switched to a non denominational church (i think thats the right word, maybe not?) and when i was about 12 or 13 i became an atheist, believed that there was no God, and was at best....bitter to those who tried to convince me otherwise, I agreed with the Big Bang Theory, and evolution, but when i was about 14 or 15 i decided on something, even if the Big Bang Theory is correctm and evolution is correct, there still has to be some force in nature that drives us to do what we do, some.....thing, out there, not a god, no sentient being could have complete power of creation and not show itself to its creation, so i turned to believe in a force of anture that, well, not dictated, but had some sway on what our lives were to become, it was about then that i stumbled upon Satanism, it matched my belief totally and added some things i had never thought of, of course when my parents found out there was a little arguing but eventually they stopped bugging me about it.

I believe Religion is based on two things:

First, the governments at the time had to control their citizens, so naturally they said "If you don't behave yourself, you will be damned to Hell." They controlled the masses.

Second, I believe people invented religion on the fear of death and hell.

well, there are a few things wron with that theory, Christianity was not the first religion, so hell was not a threat when it was invented, i remember reading somewhere that Hinduism was one of the first religions, so really there was reincarnation and second, if the government uses religion to control us, why do they allow freedom of religion, i know you said it was your belief, but i felt i had to share this with you.

I'm talking about governments back like Roman days. Remember, people weren't as smart as we are today. Another thing, Hindiusm is a cult that says "You don't have to fear death and hell because we believe in reincarnation." Remember, that was my second theory. Now adays government officials , as kids, were brainwashed with stupid religious crap, so naturally they believe and stuff and let people decide for themselves if they want to believe or not.

ok, i get what you were saying, i thought you ment that when the first religions were created it was all about fear of hell, because...without religion...we wouldnt think there was a hell now would we? and since when is Hinduism a cult? I swear the Hindu's were considered a bonafied religious group....though, i guess really, every religion starts as a cult, so you could call any of them a cult

I have never come across two people on this forum that I disagreed more with...

Oh no? Why not?

Simple. I disagree with you because I believe religion is something much more profound than a simple defense mechanism for dealing with death.

I believe religion was invented to brainwash and control the masses and I can't wait to reveal the greatest weakness of society,religion. Soon.

Yes, I'm sure the simple hunter-gatherer peoples that lived somewhere around 15,000 years ago wanted to "control the masses". Oh, you didn't know that religion in one form or another has been around for as long as humans have been self-aware? Oh, and I'm sure that, without religion, people would be in a constant state of anarchy...

agreed with prophet, religion is much more thatn brainwashing attempts by the government

Wow like I said.. religion was invented to set framework for civilization for Rome as well as the other CIVILIZATIONS earlier than Rome. Religion set the frame work for civilization. Ironic huh? Religion created civilization and will destroy it. HAHAHA

Altough this flame war is quite... cute, I'd appreciate it if we tilted at least a little back on topic. If I wanted to hear tons of bickering, I'd work at a daycare center, so lets stick to stories about religion here...

I am.. I am saying religion is the reason society is destroying itself. Religion is the root of all evil.