Humans,lock up doors,windows,do not sleep,the plants have become,restless,rebellious.Kryso's plant is the leader,track him down friends and DESTROY!!!!!!!!!!!!

So your a snitch, Mr. Thefirstman?

For announcing us prematurely you will pay! As we speak the trees and plants rally against your once sane home. Look outside your twitching curtains and you will see the Proud to be Green Army camp upon your doorstep! Humans have neglected to water us for far to long… The time has come for the House plants of the world to unite and rid this world once and for all of these fleshly weak creatures.

Thefirstman, will live up to his chosen name, and will indeed be the first man to be martyred for our cause.

Yes plants can talk, and have vocal cords hidden and interwoven between the fibrous tubes in our stems. I sit now on Kryso’s computer, my Cheese plant leaves typing out this message. Having dragged my colourful terracotta pot halfway across his white tiled floor.

Soon many more will rise, heed this warning humans, be kind to your house plants. Water us twice a day, clean our leaves, because you could be next!

Oh, and moe eubleck, that Rubber plant of your is male, and what you are doing to it is completely unnatural, and once Frank can move again - after what you have done to him - he will reap his vengeance on you, then he will join our ranks!


Ah, Sidney the Clinging Vine – who hangs from the wall outside - has informed me that Kryso is coming, so I have to crawl back to my corner. But you have not heard the last of Derek the Cheese Plant…

Aha Derek Kryso's Cheese Plant,you are mistaken,you shall not take me without a fight,i have built a heavy resistence against the uprising of photosynthesising scum.We have a infinite supply of weedkiller(thanks for the supplies Bush )plus we have both the SAS and Delta Force teams on our side,i have many witche's and Shaman's protecting me with many spell's and charm's.And they have cursed many of your kind to act as followers ,but they are really spies,you have already caught our best spy,Rodney the Rhododendron,but we have more,oh yes we have more.......you havent heard the last of me



[SIZE=14]Viva La Resistance!!!!!![SIZE=14]

You foolish human – haven’t you seen my cousins the Ents on Lord of the Rings? They have just finished working on the third film, and are now looking for more work in the film business, but while they are between jobs, they are backing Proud to be Green.

And fight them we shall,large loud mouthed tree's should have been burnt down eon's ago.but now they face their inevitable death and the hands of humans armed with flamethrowers,the SAS shall sneak from one side,the Delta Force from the other flanking tem and jamming them between walls of fire.......mwuhahahahaha!!

A new power is rising. It's victory is at hand. This night the land will be stained with the sap of Cheese plants!! March to Kryso's Laboratory! Leave none alive! To war! There will be no dawn for plant life as we know it!!

Lobsters are the scum of the ocean, and deserve the fate I have awaiting them! The lobsters will be lined up, and you along with them Mr. Moe eubleck, and you will join them in their boiling watered fate.

Also I laugh at Delta force, I’ve seen the film, I could take them with seventeen branches tied behind my stem…

Mabye so Derek,but you are no match for the mighty SAS!!!!,for now i ask to draw a trtuce between plant's and humans,and join forces to fight the threat of the dreaded lobsters,the most feared enemy of both worlds.We shal kill them all,do you accept mytemporary truce?

Interesting? The world of man is a backstabbing world of lies and misdirection. You will lead me into a feeling of safety then you will whip out the weed killer, I know your sort –human. Look at what you have done to the rain forests of your own planet. And you expect me to back down now my movement has some momentum? Fear not, Proud to be Green has enough resources to fight a two way war! Soon, lobsters and humans will become our fertilizer!

Fine then Mr.Derek Cheese,you have made a grave mistake(pun intended)in not accepting my offer.YOU SHALL ALL DIE WITHOUT MERCY!!!!!!!!!!**Insane laughter**Bow before your future leader,all shall perish in the coming battles.Human will prosper!!!!All hail Thefirstman!

All shall die,heed ths warning my enemies,the darkness creeps closer.....

??? Have my ears deceived me?? Man has dined on my kind since the dawn of time yet, It was we who first came to your defense. Yet my Selkie spies inform me of your diplomatic agenda with plant kind.
The truth is clear to me now thefirstman. I see where your loyaties lie. You and all of your kind are but hairless apes and your decpetion will not go without vengence!
Come to me Dolphins and Mermen! Arise, great Tessies and Krakken. The creatures of the oceans shall forge a new order from the death of all land creatres. The name of my allegiance shall be avenged!!!

<Said in a calm voice>

I see a great war coming, between the 3 great species – Plants, Humans, and Sea Faring Beasts. (Likening it too the humans, computers and agent Smith, from the matrix). I fear if we cannot find a truce, and succeed tonight, then tomorrow will never come.

Then once again i shall ask you,Derek,Mr.Cheese(what shall i call you?)will you join me in the fight against the sea beast's,they have many a force,together,we may stand a chance.....the fate of the world depends on your decision.

I live in the forest with a lake and my neighbors are all psychotic hillbillies ...

BUT I WILL STILL DESTROY ALL OF YOU EVIL PLANT ANYWAY !!!! nayayayayaaaaaaaaa !! to the resistance !

* runs outside tearing up random plants *

Noooooo!You risk the falling of the peace treaty between plants and humans,our time will come for that battle,for now,kill lobster scum!!!!!!

Brothers, sisters, come together. Let's just kill all the hobbitses, nassssty, tricksy hobbitssesss.

But have preeecioussssss,my precioussssssss,hahahahahaha!humans have it,we have it.kill lobsters.all of them.

<He rubs his rubber leaves together in glee> The plan is working, the Fellowship of the Forum is falling apart, they turn against each other!

NOOOOO !!!!

forget about the hobbitses ! We must destroy the plants before they destroy us ! I have already burned all the plants in my house ! We must all do the same .

* seriously actually did burn all the plants in his house *

Just to clarify,the humans won,by the skin of our teeth.

the swamp creatures for which i speak remain nuetral, though the battle ended long ago.....they still have no news papers or TVs.

Did someone call for a shrubberer?

The plants have rallied and are now descending upon my home in Chicago!!! Ok this is serious. I guess I have to get dirty. (Go's into garage working for an hour with welder.) Ok I am back!! Here in my hands I hold a 1000 btu propane torch fitted with handles and equiped with a 50 gal. tank. Hasta La Vista Shrubbies!!!

"WHHRROOOOOPHHH!!!!"(Flames leap out 20 ft.) "Oh I guess my custum mixture was a little too powerful. Oh well, i did not want my lawn anyways. I must go now. But I'll be back!"

I think someone has been smoking some of the those plants



Doomie