Yes i agree its just something passive. The teenage years can be very complex, teenagers try to be original, cool and outstanding. So they all try to relate to a group. In my opinion music plays a big part in the choice of group, but its also a question of fashion, current trends and the ppl they relate too. There are alot of other groups like the 'Rappers' group, the "metal-heads group", the "Junkies" group etc. All of those has different styles and way of acting. Emos arent different or worse.

I wouldn't worry that much for ur daughter being emo, if she is comfortable being like that, it will not harm her. I beleive a group you relate to it also depends upon ur character. Maybe she feels good only being with her emo friends. Its normal. everyone has its close group of friends, what so ever is the group is called. Probably her frineds decided to act emo, and she followed the stream, its normal for teenagers to copy their friends. And even if she is acting like hating everyone and being deprassed, im sure she doesnt do that all the time. Generally they do that only when they are with ppl they dont know, to look tough, and to be targeted as an 'emo' cause they wish to have that image. Im sure she laughs, she jokes with her friends and she even listens to love songs when she's alone Dont think shes gonna become an aggressive person or a suicidal kid. I beleive kids who try to commit suicide or cut themselves, arent because they are emos or goths, but because they have more serious personal issues like needing attention.

Don't worry, once she matures she will get out of that image..its a just something she needs to belong too

Its not the image I'm worried about, she could dress up as BatGirl for all I care. Its the attitude I worry about. The fact that to fit in she has to hate or she'll be kicked out. The fact that she is not being herself if she doesnt comb her hair in her face, glare and strike a violent pose and the ect.

How long she's been acting emo?

In my opinion its just for the image, not image as in clothes, accessories etc, by image i mean the Emo way of life. Yes its not a nice attitude, but i'm sure she doesnt mean the things she says or does, she may be just acting the part to fit in this group. Im sure u did the same thing when u were a teenager, i mean changing ur attitude and style for a period of time, to fit in your group.. we all did.

You only have to worry if she begins to be aggressive like beating others or very be very hostile to everyone. Some teens can become fixated with something, i'm aware of that, but normally its just a passive thing teenagers go through.

Thats the problem though this fixation she has. Its more than just liking the style or lifestyle, I fell sometimes the way she talks about it she is being brainwashed. Thats what bothers me the most.

Yeah a fixation can be about anything, a lifestyle, or an object etc.. but a fixation can fade away with time. She maybe brainwashed by the media and friends, its no surprise. If u're so worried u may be thinking of keeping an eye on the company she is hanging with. But i dont advice that, cause teens tend to get rebelious, if a parent says no, they would say yes just for the satisfaction of not following the rules, so it could be worse in some way. If i was u i would follow her actions, and dont try to make her feel weird, or not understood cause at the moment she feels like being emo. Maybe she needs some support.. some attention. You seem a great parent, cause ure taking alot of care for her. I'm sure u'll do the good thing to be there for her if she needs u..

Thanks for the complements. And yes this is what I hope it is a phase. The problem is she doesnt get these ideas from her friends, its mostly from the chat lines and Emo music icons such as Gerard Way. Then she relays this to her friends. I have been working on a new method of getting her out of this Emo thing and it seems to be working. But thanks for the input and the conversations, lets keep it up.

I'm not so sure that Gerard Way or My Chemical Romance are really 'Emo' icons...at least not anymore. Their music changed a great deal from their first major album to their second, which leads one to believe that perhaps the first album was more of a fabrication by producers/managers in order to further an image that was perceived to be there, but really never was. Just my opinion though.

In fact, come to think of it, I'm not sure I can name one band that falls under this 'hate everything and kill yourself' philosophy that Emo supposedly is all about. Anyone care to help?

i'm still not totally clear on what a EMO is ? ain't there some kind of puppet on sesame street called emo ? some kind of perverted elmo ?--lol

is it some kind of thing you can join ? like the red cross ? is it a automobile like a GTO ?-- like hey man i got a hot ride a EMO ?--LOL

or is it a medical term like a EKG ? some kind of weapon maybe like a RPG ? "private bring up the EMO and take out that enemy tank !" i guess it's been too long since i was in high school .

Emo's mainly come from the goth subculture. i dont know any goth bands which promote hate and killing though lol. well thats a good question, why that attitude?

one thing that bothers me though, is that they've all think they've got it so bad..

I'm a medic during the day, riding around in an ambulance, and I deal with a lot of suicide victims... and all the emo's that cut themselves, take pills and stuff like that... I always tell them: "why didn't you finish the job? Why didn't you slice your wrist the proper way? why did you take pills? it takes hours to die from pills you know... jump of a building if you really wanna do something about this "dark world" as you call it"...

and I find, that when they hear the reality, and not some therapists carefully chosen words, they stop acting emo, and start being normal...

it may seem like I just pour gas on the fire, but all the people I've said that to, never did anything about it, because deep down inside, there's a reason why they didn't cut it the proper way... why they didn't eat enough pills or simply dived off the roof...

one thing that bothers me though, is that they've all think they've got it so bad..

I'm a medic during the day, riding around in an ambulance, and I deal with a lot of suicide victims... and all the emo's that cut themselves, take pills and stuff like that... I always tell them: "why didn't you finish the job? Why didn't you slice your wrist the proper way? why did you take pills? it takes hours to die from pills you know... jump of a building if you really wanna do something about this "dark world" as you call it"...

and I find, that when they hear the reality, and not some therapists carefully chosen words, they stop acting emo, and start being normal...

it may seem like I just pour gas on the fire, but all the people I've said that to, never did anything about it, because deep down inside, there's a reason why they didn't cut it the proper way... why they didn't eat enough pills or simply dived off the roof...

excuse me; medic person,

I understand what you're saying, but as a teen who's supposedly"emo" I have to say that you don't really know what the term means or how to use the term. Personally I don't believe in the word "emo" because it's short for emotional... meaning that you would also be considered "emo," because I know that you've cried or been upset once in your life. And even though black is my chosen color, i don't feel as though other kids who call themselves emo by cutting their wrists and thinking that their life is a waste, are anything like me. Sure we may look alike but the meaning all together is portrayed differently.

If my words don't seem to shed new light think of it like this:
If an adult wants to commit suicide, they're suicidal; but if it's a teen they're automatically deemed "emo."

Emo's mainly come from the goth subculture. i dont know any goth bands which promote hate and killing though lol. well thats a good question, why that attitude?

====500th post woot!=====

Well, not really. Goth and emo are different subcultures centered around different types of music (emo is centered around bands like My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy and such, whereas goth is centered around musical genres like gothrock, deathrock, EBM and industrial). But if you aren't a part of either subculture, I guess they do look very much like each other; both consisting of black-clad, gloomy people

For A year now I have been influence by my step-daughter who follows the emo type lifestyle. From the black out fits to the heavy make-up to the emo rock bands. I've looked over and studied this new wave of its cool to be depressed and hate others and am wondering if you think it to be more of just a lifestyle of teenage outcasts or a new wave in the belief systems of the modern day. All posts with questions or answers appreciated.

I prefer goths than emos. At least goths are nice to you & you can have a conversation with them.

I'm glad that there was no emos when I went to high school. I was pretty much the reject or weird kid in my high school.

Attention whores. Sad, pathetic attention whores. That's my take on it. Ask them WHY their life is so depressed. It's one thing to dress a certain way but another to dress a certain way AND act like a depressed little whiny brat.

People go through phases.

And maybe people don't want to look and be like everyone else.

..

I was a punk and then a goth for many years--it wasn't for attention--I felt I was being true to myself and that reflected the "inner self" at that time> plus it attracted the people I wanted to be with (sort of an attention ploy) >also expressed my music taste (Sisters of Mercy-The Cure etc.)

That is true. To a certain extent I can understand teenagers who feel like they aren't part of the "normal" gang, and thus want to disassociate themselves from a group of people they feel they have little in common with. It's not the clothing style that bothers me with emo teenagers, it's the overblown depression they seem to feel over mundane, everyday happenings. You don't become a Nietzsche-praising nihilist because mommy won't take you to the My Chemical Romance concert.

And on a sidenote: The Sisters Of Mercy are awesome. My number one fave band. The Cure are great too

For A year now I have been influence by my step-daughter who follows the emo type lifestyle. From the black out fits to the heavy make-up to the emo rock bands. I've looked over and studied this new wave of its cool to be depressed and hate others and am wondering if you think it to be more of just a lifestyle of teenage outcasts or a new wave in the belief systems of the modern day. All posts with questions or answers appreciated.