(still needs extensive editing though but it has potential I think)

I wondered, if wondering makes anything at all,
I wondered still if life was like death,
I wondered, thought, pondered, if I fall,
One day when walking alone, if I fall, if I take my last breath,
Will life greet me? Will life meet me? In death will life see me?
Or will the darkness consume me? Is life blind? Does it forget?
Forgetfullness is not so hard to comprehend, because if life can see,
If life knows and does not help, would it not help? How could it possibly let,
Allow, watch, me fall, how could it, it must have forgotten, yes that is the only possibility.
Life is not like death, it is not hard, cruel, cold, calculating,
Yet welcomed, life is not welcomed as death is, life is waking when still asleep,
Death is falling asleep and never waking up, forever dreaming,
Forever in oblivion, never to wake, never to feel sorrow, worry about tomorrow, never to weep,
Never to hate, to love, to think, just to lay there and not care,
Caring is too hectic, too tiring, too time-consuming, why care when you can dream?
Why care about something that won't acknowledge, won't be there,
Why fight, why struggle, why hold on? Why cry? Why scream?
Life could be so much better if life was like dying,
If life was like waking up in someone's arms and being safe and sound,
If life did not include hurting, hoping without hope left to hope, and crying,
Life is not living but being buried, not just buried but sitting there, alive, underground.