grendals_bane Posted January 4, 2013 #5026 Share Posted January 4, 2013 Helen of Annoy saves her toe nail clippings. She glues them together to create sculptures of her favorite Russian leaders, for whom she has nothing but the greatest respect To ensure all of the nail clipping are in the best condition OverSword cleans each one with his tongue. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Star Posted January 4, 2013 #5027 Share Posted January 4, 2013 grendals_bane.......Supervises this process by personally checking each one with his, after OverSword has finished his licking routine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Helen of Annoy Posted January 4, 2013 #5028 Share Posted January 4, 2013 Aw, god damn it, I’m officially disgusted Blue Star was the real life model after which Igi from the Gogs family was shaped. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+OverSword Posted January 4, 2013 Author #5029 Share Posted January 4, 2013 Helen of Annoy thinks men who are missing teeth are sexy because it shows they have more life experience. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Helen of Annoy Posted January 4, 2013 #5030 Share Posted January 4, 2013 OverSword prefers his partners inexperienced, so they don’t notice he sometimes forgets what goes where. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simbi Laveau Posted January 4, 2013 #5031 Share Posted January 4, 2013 Helen has a collection of overswords teeth. She wears them on a chain around her neck ,with little swarovski crystals in between them. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+OverSword Posted January 4, 2013 Author #5032 Share Posted January 4, 2013 Simbi is obsessed with Japanese culture to the extent that she sent me a christmas card wishing me a meddy cdistmasu. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Helen of Annoy Posted January 4, 2013 #5033 Share Posted January 4, 2013 OverSword gives names to sushi rolls and whispers dirty things to them, thinking people in the restaurant won’t notice what he’s doing. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+OverSword Posted January 4, 2013 Author #5034 Share Posted January 4, 2013 OverSword gives names to sushi rolls and whispers dirty things to them, thinking people in the restaurant won’t notice what he’s doing. True, but I prefer sushimi.Helen is trading several family members for a sauna. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+joc Posted January 5, 2013 #5035 Share Posted January 5, 2013 Oversword knows this because he is the one who is buying Helen's 'family members'. God only knows what he has plans for! (perhaps a major sushimi party...featuring hors d'oeuvres, compliments of Helens Family Sale.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PlanB Posted January 5, 2013 #5036 Share Posted January 5, 2013 joc once won a Billy Dee Williams look-a-like contest. He achieved this by threatening the judges with a broken glass bottle that once held the malt beverage Colt .45. As he was handed his trophy, he was heard muttering under his breath, "works every time." 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Helen of Annoy Posted January 5, 2013 #5037 Share Posted January 5, 2013 PlanB chose that name after PlanA got himself permanently banned. Don’t worry, it happens all the time. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+joc Posted January 5, 2013 #5038 Share Posted January 5, 2013 joc once won a Billy Dee Williams look-a-like contest. He achieved this by threatening the judges with a broken glass bottle that once held the malt beverage Colt .45. As he was handed his trophy, he was heard muttering under his breath, "works every time." Just a note: the name of this thread is tell a LIE....the above happened in 1993, 1995 and as recently as 2006...it does work every time! PlanB chose that name after PlanA got himself permanently banned.Don’t worry, it happens all the time. The truth is we all call up Helen to help us with our plans...but the problem is, all of her plans are the same: Put an octopus on your head and call it done! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Helen of Annoy Posted January 5, 2013 #5039 Share Posted January 5, 2013 You ungrateful son of squid, was it not done in 2007, when you pleaded "not guilty by the reason of insanity" in court and my octopus-on-head PlanAAndAOnly worked?! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+joc Posted January 5, 2013 #5040 Share Posted January 5, 2013 No, your Un-heiness...it was 2008 and what you said was, "Slap the judge in the head with this Octopus! Then they'll really think you are crazy." Instead, the judge found me in contempt of court and after 12 hours in the Emergency Room when I finally woke up from the convulsions that I underwent because of the Bailif's Tazer...I spent the next 14 months in jail. Thanks alot! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Helen of Annoy Posted January 5, 2013 #5041 Share Posted January 5, 2013 (edited) It was not my fault. You overdid it. I said “slap the judge with this octopus” not “slap him with this octopus repeatedly until he falls down, then put a foot on his chest and spin the octopus in the air in triumphant fashion”. Since judge tried to defend himself by grabbing you by your... ahem... family jewels, and you responded with kicking him in the ribs (points for quick reaction!), tazering was kind of expected. Edited January 5, 2013 by Helen of Annoy 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+joc Posted January 5, 2013 #5042 Share Posted January 5, 2013 Maybe, but what I never expected, and what the Bailiff never expected was for you to grab his Tazer Gun and shoot the barbs straight into my forehead...and then you yanked them out, reloaded and shot them into my left ear...I went unconscious at that point...but I was always curious why I had little holes and burn marks on my...uh...privates. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ealdwita Posted January 5, 2013 #5043 Share Posted January 5, 2013 Maybe, but what I never expected, and what the Bailiff never expected was for you to grab his Tazer Gun and shoot the barbs straight into my forehead...and then you yanked them out, reloaded and shot them into my left ear...I went unconscious at that point...but I was always curious why I had little holes and burn marks on my...uh...privates. Everybody congratulated Helen on such fine shooting, especially when you consider how tiny the target was! 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SpiritWriter Posted January 5, 2013 #5044 Share Posted January 5, 2013 Ealdwita sleeps in mouse turds. His wife serves him cereal (breakfast in bed) in the morning, he loves it with bananas and raisins. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xYlvax Posted January 5, 2013 #5045 Share Posted January 5, 2013 SpiritWriter pretends to be a ghost and runs around in sheets with chains. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+joc Posted January 5, 2013 #5046 Share Posted January 5, 2013 NikkiAidyn pretends to be a Vampire Goddess and goes around biting the unsuspecting on the neck. : Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Helen of Annoy Posted January 5, 2013 #5047 Share Posted January 5, 2013 And that’s the reason why joc walks around, sleeps, eats and does anything else with his head tilted to one side, accidentally exposing his unsuspecting neck. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ouija ouija Posted January 5, 2013 #5048 Share Posted January 5, 2013 Helen has been voted President of her local Women's Institute for the past two decades. Some achievement, you say ........ she must be very popular, you say. No, this is not the case, she holds the position unopposed because of threats made to the other three members invoving the octopus-bashing and taser-shooting mentioned in previous posts. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PlanB Posted January 5, 2013 #5049 Share Posted January 5, 2013 ouija ouija's favorite band is Duran Duran, favorite city is New York, New York and favorite assassin is Sirhan Sirhan. The last part disturbed me too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ouija ouija Posted January 6, 2013 #5050 Share Posted January 6, 2013 ouija ouija's favorite band is Duran Duran, favorite city is New York, New York and favorite assassin is Sirhan Sirhan. The last part disturbed me too. And what, exactly, is wrong with having a favourite assassin? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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