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OverSword

[Archived] Make up a lie about poster above

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Simbi believes she wasn’t given a ticket, only a warning, because she looks so good. The truth is, she looks so scary the cop thought to himself: “I’d rather live to retire than die for the principles.”

So he let her drive away, pretending he didn't notice a hand lifelessly hanging out the trunk of her car. As the car started to speed up, so the hand started to move on the wind, like it's waving goodbye to this cruel and often confusing world.

If it got me out of rickets for real,trust me,no problem with this at all .

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Helen is very frugal . When she runs out of diapers ,she uses the coffee filters in their place,and vice versa.

It works ok,until the hatopus actually has to go .

When she reuses them ,is when the problems start .

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Simbi Laveau was recently spotted in the audience of the Jerry Springer Show chanting 'JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!'

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OverSword was on the stage. His fake beard and wig just ripped off in fight with transvestite who accused him of being the surrogate mother of his adopted twins, before he had re-re-assignment surgery and went male again.

Then it started to get weird, because a woman in the audience recognized her long lost son in de-bearded OverSword, demanding very loudly he pays her back every cent she saved for his college that he robbed off the account and spent on... well, I don’t have to tell the whole story in one breath.

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LOL! I don't know if I should be angry that a woman in Crotia knows who Jerry Springer is or not!

Helen of Annoy has been trying to get on the Jerry Springer show for years. Unfortunately(?) they don't consider her strange enough and she was explicit that she would not flash her breasts since it is the most watched show in Croatia.

(please note this is in the lying thread the truth is that Helen has been on Springer many times including the time I was on it)

Edited by OverSword
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Simbi Laveau was recently spotted in the audience of the Jerry Springer Show chanting 'JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!'

Dude ,this is very true . I'm serious . I'm on film ,and I even make a comment to a guest at the end .

No one I know saw it air ,and then a rockstar pal of mine saw it down in Texas ,and I get this hysterical text message .

He was with a bunch of other musicians .No idea who ,but he's pointing at the screen going ,I KNOW HER !,

Ive even flown to Chicago to see Jerry .

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Oversword has also been on Maury Povich ten times ,because he's got all these baby mamas .

This is why he's always at work when he's on UM. He's needs 20 hours overtime a week,to keep up with his child support payments .

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Simbi got her start on the New York music scene when Jon Bon Jovi promised to make her a back-up singer if she would take his poodle for a walk and pick up his poop. He was lying of course and never even gave her an audition and doesn't even remember who she is even though they've been introduced 15 times, but every time Simbi gets drunk it's just on and on about how she should've been Bon Jovi's back-up singer and also how 'She's a Little Run Away' was written about her. I don't know how many times there has been a drunken message of the following on my answering machine

Ooh, she's a little runaway.

Daddy's girl learned fast

All those things he couldn't say.

Ooh, she's a little runaway.

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It was OverSword leaving drunk messages on his own answering machine. Pretending he can’t recognize his own voice.

When he’s not singing he’s begging his own self forgiveness in voice that is supposed to sound like his ex-girlfriend.

Nothing to be ashamed of, we all believe in the truth that pleases us the most, not the one that is the closest to what actually happened.

(The problem is that his drunken alter-ego is planning to leave a message from his landlord, letting him know he doesn't have to pay rent from now on.)

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Helen despises cars of all kinds and has secretly been plotting to destroy them all and bomb every last car manufacturing facility around the world forcing us all back to cycling, busing or riding a train.

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Lady Kasey deliberately forgot to mention donkey riding, because she had broken pride after trying to ride a donkey during crossing the Rocky Mountains for the first time. Her first time, not historically first, she’s not that old which is obvious from the fact that she can’t ride a donkey.

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Simbi got her start on the New York music scene when Jon Bon Jovi promised to make her a back-up singer if she would take his poodle for a walk and pick up his poop. He was lying of course and never even gave her an audition and doesn't even remember who she is even though they've been introduced 15 times, but every time Simbi gets drunk it's just on and on about how she should've been Bon Jovi's back-up singer and also how 'She's a Little Run Away' was written about her. I don't know how many times there has been a drunken message of the following on my answering machine

Ooh, she's a little runaway.

Daddy's girl learned fast

All those things he couldn't say.

Ooh, she's a little runaway.

The fact you know the lyrics ,is beyond telling . *gigglies*

Oh and,he's from New jersey ,not the NY scene. Yes,we ny scene people are very specific about this .

Bon jovi ,Springsteen ,even Madonna ,NOT FROM NYC ....ahem....yes,we are a snotty grew in nyc .

Edited by Simbi Laveau

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Helen is a tattoo artist in her spare time ,and in a drunken blackout,tattooed an exact replica of lady Kaseys donkey ,on overswords butt.

He was just as drunk .Lady Kasey just laughed maniacally,as Helen is not a good tattoo artist .

Said tattoo looked more like a ferret ,than a,donkey .

Oversword has a hard time explaining it to his groupies .

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Simbi comes from a small town in Iowa pretending to come from NYC...

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Tsa la gie oyate (say that ten times fast !) yearns to be a power ranger ,but is completely torn as to which color . Pink ranger ? Yellow ranger ,green ?!? Black !??!

In the mean time, Tsa la stays at home all day and practices coool power ranger yells and poses(in the mirror of course) ,while waiting for the producers to call .

Going on year 11 of waiting,but Tsa la is sssuuurrreee the call is coming .

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oh well yeah.... clearly simbi can play the of the roll of a rock star ......... Yep! I saw it you tripped . he'd be better off if some one told him that he needs to be famous

first ..........and can't come to grips with just who is martin & lewis are............ooops! there goes the wig!

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rrainn clogs the drain in the bathtub every time she shaves her legs

(btw Simbi, I know he's from Jersey, and I know you're in love with him and that you've also got a huge thing for Johnny Thunder)

Edited by OverSword
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OverSword is absolutely beside himself with jealousy at this precise moment. He knows that if he hears Simbi mention her fantasy lovers one more time he's probably going to die from jealousy. Unfortunately, he is at work at the moment and colleagues are looking at him writhing about on the floor, red in the face, ripping at his clothes and biting his wrists, wondering what it is all about and trying to decide whether to call 'security' or the emergency services.

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ouija voted they call security. Not out of spite or any ill intention, she simply believes shock therapy is the best therapy when love and related mental illnesses are in question.

Why going through bureaucratic hell in order to shock someone back to mental health if you can have him tasered for free and no paper work at all.

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ouija voted they call security. Not out of spite or any ill intention, she simply believes shock therapy is the best therapy when love and related mental illnesses are in question.

Why going through bureaucratic hell in order to shock someone back to mental health if you can have him tasered for free and no paper work at all.

I actually laughed out loud when I read this :lol:

Helen is especially keen that security are called rather than emergency services because she is Head of Security in OverSword's office block ............ :o oops! he wasn't supposed to know that. Er, too late ..... sorry, Helen :hmm: .

Helen only applied for the job because it means she gets to taser whoever she wants, whenever she wants. In fact she has been known to taser herself in quiet times. Also takes it home with her at weekends.

Edited by ouija ouija
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I actually laughed out loud when I read this :lol:

Helen is especially keen that security are called rather than emergency services because she is Head of Security in OverSword's office block ............ :o oops! he wasn't supposed to know that. Er, too late ..... sorry, Helen :hmm: .

Helen only applied for the job because it means she gets to taser whoever she wants, whenever she wants. In fact she has been known to taser herself in quiet times. Also takes it home with her at weekends.

Ouija has been using her taser for .. well not so savoury uses , she usually gives herself a zap in the bedroom so she can be an electric charged fornicating machine , unfortunately last time she tried it the result was not as expected , she accidently tased her ear off and now she is having trouble hearing out of the new prosthetic replacement .

Please read the instructions before use :cry: !

TiP.

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Tip is the administrator on a web-site dedicated to alternative sexual kink practices and the safest most discreet ways to satisfy yourself under dangerous conditions and with pokey objects.

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Tip is the administrator on a web-site dedicated to alternative sexual kink practices and the safest most discreet ways to satisfy yourself under dangerous conditions and with pokey objects.

Oversword happens to be my number 1 customer , his user name is nothingisofflimits . As his user name suggests he buys everything that we have for sale , he has cleaned me out of squash balls and gerbils this month .

You had best keep your ordering to a minimum this month buddy , what is it you do will 100 squash balls a month ?

TiP.

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Just check my member page (blush)

Tipoteps user name on his fetish website is 'Granny Packer' Every year he attends the wrinkle convention in Las Vegas Nevada, BYOC (bring your own crisco) Every wrinkle is a new experince according to tip.

Here is a picture of his date for 2013

l.gif

Hot stuff Tip, way better than last year.

Edited by OverSword
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This guy picked me up this morning. I was standing on the corner and he just pulled over. Something came over me and I got into the back seat of the car. I didnt say anything, didnt even smile. He kept looking at me in the rear view mirror. He kinda smiled, kinda blushed and I could hear him in my mind. He was saying "its me! Its Oversword". I could understand him but didnt let on to it. He dropped me off at QFC which was exactly where i was going. And that was it, i didnt say goodbye, i didnt wave, just got out of the car and went into the store. I looked around when I came out but he was gone. Kinda wierd if you ask me...

What was your impression of the experience Oversword?

Edited by SpiritWriter

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