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OverSword

[Archived] Make up a lie about poster above

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This guy picked me up this morning. I was standing on the corner and he just pulled over. Something came over me and I got into the back seat of the car. I didnt say anything, didnt even smile. He kept looking at me in the rear view mirror. He kinda smiled, kinda blushed and I could hear him in my mind. He was saying "its me! Its Oversword". I could understand him but didnt let on to it. He dropped me off at QFC which was exactly where i was going. And that was it, i didnt say goodbye, i didnt wave, just got out of the car and went into the store. I looked around when I came out but he was gone. Kinda wierd if you ask me...

What was your impression of the experience Oversword?

SpiritWriter was indeed standing on the corner ... but why you may ask ?

She was waiting for someone to come along ( anyone ) and it just happened to be OverSword on this way back from the post office , he was picking up his latest delivery of products from " TipsToys " . Once SpiritWriter found out that OverSword was packing all manner of wild accessories the gloves came off .

It was like a scene from UFC84 , there was claret flying all over the place , In the end OverSword had to hand over half of his delivery and he also had to walk home wearing his gimp costume and nothing else .

TiP.

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And tip knows this because he was a bug on the dashboard.. now he's a bug in the computer. :D

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Oh I'm so tempted to dive int the realm of inappropriateness right now.

When spirit writer climbed into the back seat of my car uninvited I thought I was a dead man. I'm thinking 'Crazy lady in the back seat, probably got a gun, I'm dead, I wish I told my mother I loved her the last time we spoke' Then when I stopped at the light near the QFC (that's a grocery store in the state of Washington for all you foriegners) she got out and went shopping. I didn't know until I read the post it was SW trying to project her thoughts into my mind. If I had known it was her I would have told her I would be at the Rock Box around 5:30 or 6:00 tonite with some co-workers.

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OverSword had to clean his house expecting the paranormality to escalate into a date with SpiritWriter. Because if she accepts the innocent invitation to a late cup of cafe late... you can’t let her walk into gerbil infested storage of balls, rubber dolls dressed up into... ahem.

So he brought his gerbils to work, claiming they will boost productivity by making people scream and jump on chairs and desks. Nothing helps the working atmosphere like sudden rodent touch on and up your leg.

Rest of the gear made to the top 5 strangest donations to Red Cross, but not to the no.1.

Edit: caffe latte. languages had a little fight inside my brain.

Edited by Helen of Annoy
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Yeah, that was pretty passive aggressive of me wasn't it...I now feel like less than a real man.

Helen of Annoy built a jetpack because she's tired of being shorter than everyone all the time.

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OverSword once had a book signing at Barnes & Noble. It took security over an hour for them to realize that he wasn't actually JK Rowling before they kicked him out. His terrible English accent gave it away.

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If PlanB fails, PlanC starts with French accent and goes full speed in reverse.

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Helens octopus hasnt reached her full spiritual awareness yet but helen keeps trying to get her there.

Oh and thanks oversword for not going into the realm of inappropriatness I knew I was setting myself up, but I still liked the story.. (pretend like this text is smaller)

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SpiritWriter actually lives in The Realm of Innapropriateness. Only women are allowed in there and she would have been in a lot of trouble if OverSword had marched in, bottle of cheap red plonk in one hand, cheap red flowers from the local service station in the other, asking for her. The Realm of I. is completely teetotal and has aspirations to be classy ....... so service station flowers definitely NOT acceptable.

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Ouija has tempted to venture into my realm and has only been succesful three times. I have recently put down the torch and handed it to helen (not oversword or any other man of course), and because of this I cannot get into the specifics (or complications) of those particular matters.

Edited by SpiritWriter

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SpiritWriters realm used to be non-genre oriented, but then one day she went to bed bath and beyond and the pottery barn and re decorated. It's not really for women only it's justthat it's now so sickeningly girly that no male wants to go there.

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Oh, yes, that’s exactly how shopping can alter your hormones and consequential stuff in your body.

For example, OverSword grew second set of external genitalia upon visiting hardware store and buying a jackhammer.

The trouble is that his metabolism can support only one erection at the time, so he’s doomed to look half flaccid instead of double potent.

He asked doctors what could be done about that and they said he has only one brain to shut down and redirect blood to his privates so there’s nothing to be done, except joining the carnival or hiding the extra set by wearing thong at all times.

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Helens hat is sticking rather well these days and has accepted the inappropriate responsibility to the utmost extreme. She now points outs (using all of her tentacles) every genetalic anamoly she can find and exploits them on a the world wide web in full view of millions of participants.

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SpiritWriter has no body anomalies. She is an anomaly.

Starting with two-dimensionality but she is about to fix that with bicycle hand pump, as soon as she figures out how to stop the air from escaping her new 3D form.

It seems most of the air escapes through her nose, so she tried clamping it shut but it damn hurts.

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Helen of Annoy is opening a sushi joint called Tentacles.

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OverSword just told you what he dreamt last night and woke up drooling like St.Bernard.

Which reminds me... because St.Bernards are Swiss dogs they are often given cushions and blankets with Swiss flag motif: red with white cross. OverSword didn’t know that, but his ex-girlfriend did. Now you know too, why OverSword used to have two Swiss cushions, one blanket and one funny cut rain coat, and now you also know why that rain coat was cut so funny – it was cut for real St.Bernards, not honorary ones. It doesn't matter now when everything she gave him was burnt in his front yard. The trouble is, OS has no front yard and apparently there's the fine for those who make bonfires in the street.

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Helen buys St Bernards from Switzerland and sends counterfeit money orders to pay for them.

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Asteroid had a lot of st. Bernards, 102 to be exact. He was recently ripped off by accepting funds wired from an unusual check. He thought it was odd that he was overpaid exorbuntly but none the less was excited about his cash. On his way home from the bank he sawa tall slender figure in his back yard which was half black and half white and shadows of puppies scampering across the gate. As he was noticing this he wad knocked to the ground by the switzerland police, hand shackled and carted off to jail. The oldest st. Bernard is the only one remaining and he cant bail him out because hes only a dog afterall.

Edited by SpiritWriter
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ScriptWriter can summon the spirit of Rod Hull upon a whim. Together they plot the downfall of Honey Boo Boo and make jelly.

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Paraweird scoffs at SpiritWriter for her ability to summon up Mr. Hull at will, HOWEVER, the truth is that he is GREEN with envy! He would give anything(and that includes all the ring-pull tops he's saved), to be able to summon up anybody.

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Ouija Ouija can travel through time, but doesn't because time-travelling gorillas just don't fly around here anymore ;).

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Ouija Ouija can travel through time, but doesn't because time-travelling gorillas just don't fly around here anymore ;).

Paraweird would like to be a flying Gorilla when he gets older , problem is that he is way to paranoid and weird to travel in time , could you imagine a paranoid weird paradox ?

TiP.

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Tipotep only came into his present being a few years ago. A large rock was discovered by some kids playing at the beach, it had come in after a great storm some time ago but no one really paid it any mind. The rock had crystals on the outside of it, and being the sons of a geologist they ran to tell their dad. They thought he might be interested and boy were they right! The dad broke the rock open and tipotep came out. They brought tipotep home wanting to teach him the language and culture of Australia but had to send him away after he tried to get with the mans wife. The rock, broken nearly perfectly in half still has tipoteps shape and smell and is very attractive to some of the wildlife..

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SpiritWriter stole candy bar once, but she felt so guilty she bought another one and tried to secretly replace it on the same shelf she stole from. She got the shelf right, the store was wrong, but that's not so important. Important thing is that cashier saw her unsteal the candy bar and thought it must be poisoned or something. So now everyone that works in that particular store keeps an eye on SW, just in case their customers start dropping dead or complaining about razor blades in candies.

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SpiritWriter stole candy bar once, but she felt so guilty she bought another one and tried to secretly replace it on the same shelf she stole from. She got the shelf right, the store was wrong, but that's not so important. Important thing is that cashier saw her unsteal the candy bar and thought it must be poisoned or something. So now everyone that works in that particular store keeps an eye on SW, just in case their customers start dropping dead or complaining about razor blades in candies.

I actually did get caught stealing a snickers bar but this was in the 80's. Helen knew this because she traveled back in time riding on a gorilla. This is not a lie this is the truth because unlike what tipotep would have you believe gorillas can fly.. its just that not everyone knows how to find the portal. Helen is the absolute master at portal finding.. this is how she found my snickers bar and where she retreaved the squid (but I think you guys knew that already)... helen im flattered you are interested in my past...

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