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Taun

Things you would like to Invent Thread

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Let's use this thread to post inventions we would really like to see - -but may or may not be practical...

I'll start...

I would like to invent a sign that is part of my cars windows (side and back) ... It would normally be 'off' and not obstruct my vision, but when 'provoked' would allow me to flash a sign at the offending vehicle... It would have stored messages that could be flashed with a single button like:

#1 - "Hey stupid! Hang up and drive!"

#2 - "Your turn signals are still on dumby"

#3 - "Get the heck off my bumper or I'll jamb on my brakes!"

#4 - "I would say 'learn how to drive stupid' but it looks like you already learned how to drive stupid!"

What's your 'invention'?

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Posted (edited)

I'd invent a tool for taking wrinkles and creases out of clothes.

Or invent a female companion.

Edited by Eldorado

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I'd invent a tool for taking wrinkles and creases out of clothes.

They're called irons.

Or invent a female companion.

They're called women.

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They're called irons.

They're called women.

:lol:

How many young people today have actually used an iron?... A much lesser percentage than my age group I would bet...

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Posted (edited)

:lol:

How many young people today have actually used an iron?... A much lesser percentage than my age group I would bet...

I'm not a young person but I still try to avoid ironing wherever possible - I'll live with the creases!

Edited by schizoidwoman

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Posted (edited)

They're called irons.

They're called women.

laugh.gif I can almost feel his face go a a bit red once he reads this lol

How many young people today have actually used an iron?... A much lesser percentage than my age group I would bet...

Once this morning.. I forgot to have Becky's school uniform ironed and left out last night like I usually do.. So I had to iron it this morning

Things I would like to see invented....

Rosie from The Jetsons.. A robot to do all the chores, programmed the way you like it and you do not have to pay her lol

The device that goes on to a dog to stop him from barking...well I would love one for a cat.. because my tom cat is very annoying..

A transporter, cut out the travelling for hours ..

A pillow cooler.. I am tired of flipping it over and over.. I wish it would just stay cool

Airline food that actually tasted like........food !!

The opposite of a microwave... like say you had just purchased a 6 pack or some drinks that were not exactly cold.. You could place them into this machine and set it for 30 seconds, they come out ice cold just as you like it...

A stupid person zapper ... Like a ray gun.. the second they open their mouth and come out with dumb sentences and trash talk.. you zap them with it, and it drowns out their annoying voices.. They will be too dumb to notice you have done lol

Windows..... One that doesn't keep doing updates and causing problems

Cures for diseases that do not hurt or make the patient feel worse..

Edited by Beckys_Mom

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Posted (edited)

I'd need to invent my female companion with a male sense of humour methinks.

I'd also invent a door answering/phone-answering robot who can stand/sit talking to people that I can't be bothered talking to..... and they'll think it's me! Ha! Ha!

Edited by Eldorado

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I'd need to invent my female companion with a male sense of humour methinks.

Then you would need the stupid person zapper that I spoke of lol......I am joking with you tongue.gif

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Posted (edited)

BM, there are already cool/chilled pillows, a device to train a dog not to be so barking, and even an "instant" beverage chiller- not by the six pack but rather by the individual drink :) My hubby says there is indeed already a "directional" silencer too- it sends out a disrupting wave to cancel out sound waves- that might work for stupid people :)

Edit- he said it's called a "speech jammer gun".

Edited by rashore

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Posted (edited)

Then you would need the stupid person zapper that I spoke of lol......I am joking with you tongue.gif

Not so quick with the Zapper........ it would cost your hubby a fortune recharging the battery on his. :yes:

lol

Edited by Eldorado

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...

Once this morning.. I forgot to have Becky's school uniform ironed and left out last night like I usually do.. So I had to iron it this morning

years ago (back in the old US ARMY green 'fatigue' uniform days) we were standing in morning formation... The Platoon SGT decided to conduct a surprise inspection... Fatigue uniforms were expected to be starched, with 'sharp creases'

When he came to the guy next to me he saw that the soldiers uniform was absolutely dreadful! nothing but wrinkles - it looked like he had wadded it up while damp and let it dry...

The outraged SGT said: "What the heck is this? What kind of creases are these?"

The soldier replied, "These are summer creases Sgt."

"What the **** are summer creases?"

The soldier shrugged, "Some 'er creases... Some 'er wrinkles"

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I would like to invent a sign that is part of my cars windows (side and back) ... It would normally be 'off' and not obstruct my vision, but when 'provoked' would allow me to flash a sign at the offending vehicle... It would have stored messages that could be flashed with a single button like:

#1 - "Hey stupid! Hang up and drive!"

#2 - "Your turn signals are still on dumby"

#3 - "Get the heck off my bumper or I'll jamb on my brakes!"

#4 - "I would say 'learn how to drive stupid' but it looks like you already learned how to drive stupid!"

What's your 'invention'?

I would love an invention like this... though mine would be a lot more vulgar. :blush:

Inconsiderate drivers really p*** me off. Why, on a three lane freeway, do people group up and drive the same speed in every lane? Insanity...

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Posted (edited)

BM, there are already cool/chilled pillows

Seriously? Where? I would LOVE them...I thought I was buying some from Argos one time.. but they re not as cool as I would have liked

a device to train a dog not to be so barking,

I know, I wanted one for my cat lol

and even an "instant" beverage chiller- not by the six pack but rather by the individual drink

Like the opposite to a microwave...put it in for 30 seconds and bingo? Where can I get one of those.. or similar? Don't forger I am talking 30 seconds or up to 1 min lol

My hubby says there is indeed already a "directional" silencer too- it sends out a disrupting wave to cancel out sound waves- that might work for stupid people :)

Edit- he said it's called a "speech jammer gun".

I have never seen one of those...I would love one..The moment you press the button you cannot hear them speak..lol OR it translates their words into logical sentences.. IF only !

Edited by Beckys_Mom

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I would love an invention like this... though mine would be a lot more vulgar. :blush:

Inconsiderate drivers really p*** me off. Why, on a three lane freeway, do people group up and drive the same speed in every lane? Insanity...

Well... I considered being a bit more 'colorful' in the language... but decided to try and cut down a bit on the road rage, and drive by flipping offs...

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Not so quick with the Zapper........ it would cost your hubby a fortune recharging the battery on his. :yes:

lol

laugh.gif Ha ha very good.. But see I would use it on him...Hey it would still cost him a fortune, because he usually pays for everything.. I give my money to him he manages it all..

years ago (back in the old US ARMY green 'fatigue' uniform days) we were standing in morning formation... The Platoon SGT decided to conduct a surprise inspection... Fatigue uniforms were expected to be starched, with 'sharp creases'

When he came to the guy next to me he saw that the soldiers uniform was absolutely dreadful! nothing but wrinkles - it looked like he had wadded it up while damp and let it dry...

The outraged SGT said: "What the heck is this? What kind of creases are these?"

The soldier replied, "These are summer creases Sgt."

"What the **** are summer creases?"

The soldier shrugged, "Some 'er creases... Some 'er wrinkles"

Ha ha @ some er creases

I cannot stand creases in clothes though.. My husband would attempt to leave the house with created Jeans now and again ...The odd time if he is rushing our daughter out to a party or some place, he would stick creased clothes on here and not think anything of it.. well, until he passes me in the hall and I spot it ..And then its get back up there and get those ironed.. she is not going out looking like something that got pulled out of the washer !!

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Posted (edited)

laugh.gif Ha ha very good.. But see I would use it on him...Hey it would still cost him a fortune, because he usually pays for everything.. I give my money to him he manages it all..

Ha ha @ some er creases

I cannot stand creases in clothes though.. My husband would attempt to leave the house with created Jeans now and again ...The odd time if he is rushing our daughter out to a party or some place, he would stick creased clothes on here and not think anything of it.. well, until he passes me in the hall and I spot it ..And then its get back up there and get those ironed.. she is not going out looking like something that got pulled out of the washer !!

There's an old joke (at least here in the States) about the main, fundamental difference between men and women (aside from biology)...

A woman can be standing in a closet the size of a train station - full of clothes and say (and mean) "I have nothing to wear" ...

A man can go to a dirty clothes hamper, pick up a shirt, sniff it and say "Yeah. I can wear that"

Edited by Taun

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and even an "instant" beverage chiller- not by the six pack but rather by the individual drink :).

You must be talking about this incredible invention.

three%2Bice%2Bcubes.jpg

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Get your credit card out, BM...

http://www.costacooler.com/

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The opposite of a microwave... like say you had just purchased a 6 pack or some drinks that were not exactly cold.. You could place them into this machine and set it for 30 seconds, they come out ice cold just as you like it...

This would work also...

post-102111-0-44696700-1330968417_thumb.

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Viola! The chill pillow...

http://www.chillowstore.com/

Is there anything left to invent? :P

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Good gravely I would LOVE one of those.. It says it can store up to 9 messages.. I would have fun with that, even if it only allows you up to 250 characters for each message lol

There's an old joke (at least here in the States) about the main, fundamental difference between men and women (aside from biology)...

A woman can be standing in a closet the size of a train station - full of clothes and say (and mean) "I have nothing to wear" ...

A man can go to a dirty clothes hamper, pick up a shirt, sniff it and say "Yeah. I can wear that"

So TRUE... I am guilty of that.. ( wish I wasn't ) .. I can never make up my mind. and I hate it.. I even hate clothes shopping.. I can however easily enter a men's clothing store and pick out an outfit for the other half in the space of 5 mins and he will love it.. But in a ladies store.. forget it..

Get your credit card out, BM...

http://www.costacooler.com/

Look very neat Michelle and I wouldn't mind one of those. But what I was thinking of was the same as a the microwave.. Like even cooling food that you accidentally left out in the heat.. Or Like my husband who is forever heating up a cup of coffee in the microwave for like 30 seconds.. Well to be able to do the same with say a glass of water.. or milk and so on that you want cold ASAP ...

When I make dinner for everyone at home.. I would tend to take some glasses from the cupboard... rinse them again with cold water, then stick the glasses in the coldest part of my freezer.. By the time I have dinner ready, I can set them down a nice tall frosted glass of milk or whatever.. But say I forgot to do that...If I had one of those machines that could do it in a matter of seconds.. it would be great

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Posted (edited)

I want a stapler that works all the time without jamming. (And don't tell me about paper clips! ^_^ )

Edited by J. K.

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