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The_Sensual_One

[Archived] YOU are BANNED! (Part 2)

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Banned for trying to climb your way out of being a conspiracy theorist.

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Banned for making me feel bad of my drawing skills :cry:

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Banned for having drawing skills. What do I have??

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Banned for you have a question in your ban.

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Banned for banning question marks!

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banned for selling rotten eggs to the vicar's wife

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Banned for that’s not your business, especially since she was asking for more.

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Banned for butting in on others business

Edited by Blue Star

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Banned for that’s my mission here on Earth. That and opening the door for cats who are in great hurry to get in the house because they feel like getting out the house.

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Banned because of my liking your topsy turvy thinking as much as I do......it doesn't look good on my CV.

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Banned for my CV doesn’t look good no matter who writes it.

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Banned for having a CV.

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Banned for it's more like VC in my case. WC to be more precise.

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Banned for toilet jokes.

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Banned for you still haven’t heard the one about a man sitting on the toilet, pushing hard, when the electricity went out.

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Banned for not including the punch line.

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Banned for I was waiting for you to ask :D

So as the power went out, he starts screaming in the dark: “AAAAAAAAAA!!!”

His wife opens the bathroom door, holding a lit candle and asks: “What’t the matter with you, you idiot, why are you screaming like that?”

“Oh, good, thank god” he says “I thought I popped my eyes out.”

I'm pretty sure I told this one before... ah, what can you do, we live in age of reruns.

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Banned for not realising that re-runs can be just as funny second(third, fourth), time around.

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Banned for maybe, but I’m starting to feel sorry for the poor guy getting scared like that each time I tell that joke.

Wait, it reminded me of another one:

Two friends are shopping. Younger, newlywed says: “I’d like a nice necktie for my husband, one that will make his eyes stick out.”

Older, married for years replies: “Any necktie will make his eyes stick out, you just have to tighten it.

It should be told, not written, it's all in the tone of voice...

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Banned for some how....i'm not sure quite how......but your tone Misses H o A, comes across as clear as telepathy.

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Banned for that's because my fairy godmother was generous but insane.

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Banned because I don't have a fairy godmother :cry:

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Banned because I don't have a fairy godmother :cry:

banned for not joining the dark side

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Banned for making me give up my purple lightsaber

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Banned because I don't have a fairy godmother :cry:

Banned for I'd send you mine but I'm not sure if that's what you had in mind. She made me pestilence instead of giving me patience and that sort of stuff.

Banned also for lightsabers don’t kill people, screenplay writers do.

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