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Saru

US government: "mermaids don't exist"

87 posts in this topic

In an unusual announcement the US government has assured people that mermaids most likely don't exist.

The United States government has assured its citizens that, much like zombies, mermaids probably do not exist, saying in an official post: "No evidence of aquatic humanoids has ever been found".

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They do... They just don't us to know about them! Conspiracies! Argh!

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The government just ruined 100s of little girls dreams. Although when I was told I couldn't grow up to be a dinosaur I was devastated, then moved on to horses.

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SPOILSPORTS! :o

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Posted (edited)

Why did they even mention Zombies in this. Most of the article is about zombies. LOL

Me thinks they jsut wanted to make more of a point about the zombies than the mermaids.

Edited by Coffey

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What with the economy, huge debt, the health care fiasco, and various wars, I'm surprized the US government finds the time for this kind of stuff. I can see it now...Congressman assures his constituents that he's been 'working hard' on their behalf by de-bunking mermaids and zombies. :rolleyes:

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Finally, I actually believe our government is telling the truth, for once.

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bwa hahahaha !!!

Really, the feel the need to "let the people know" that they dont exsist... Makes me think that the are more full of beans then any thing else. I mean really, what is the need to now turn around and say that there are no mermaids...

And Zombies, Im sorry but I have to admit that given the resent things that have been hapening in the States, with that new drug out on the street, I can see a Zombie up rising... lol

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Maybe they should have a word with that school that is using Nessie to disprove evolution.

Or maybe that school could use mermaids as stronger evidence to disprove evolution.

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Finally, I can dig up my garden and plant what I want to plant instead of peashooters, cherry bombs, doom-shrooms, cob cannons, and the like.

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bwa hahahaha !!!

Really, the feel the need to "let the people know" that they dont exsist... Makes me think that the are more full of beans then any thing else. I mean really, what is the need to now turn around and say that there are no mermaids...

And Zombies, Im sorry but I have to admit that given the resent things that have been hapening in the States, with that new drug out on the street, I can see a Zombie up rising... lol

Well i said this when Nasa starts giving in to conspiracy theorists trying to prove they went ot the moon etc. If it's so silly then why are they bothering to even answer these things? lol

It's like if a person came upto me and said "your not a man, you don't have balls"... I'm not going to actually stoop low enough to that persons level and pull my balls out am I? lol

What with the economy, huge debt, the health care fiasco, and various wars, I'm surprized the US government finds the time for this kind of stuff. I can see it now...Congressman assures his constituents that he's been 'working hard' on their behalf by de-bunking mermaids and zombies. :rolleyes:

I think you covered why in your post... To change the subject and make people think about somehting else instead of the state of the econemy etc.

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Posted (edited)

Why did they even mention Zombies in this. Most of the article is about zombies. LOL

Me thinks they jsut wanted to make more of a point about the zombies than the mermaids.

I wonder if The Walking Dead might be responsible for a recent surge in Zombie fear!

That bloke who bit off a tramps face probably didn't help matters...

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/4372923/Miami-cannibal-attack-photo-emerges.html (Sorry its from the Sun, but the image looks like its straight from a Zombie film)

http://thecount.com/2012/05/30/florida-zombie-victim-pictured/face-eating-victim/ (Do not click this link if you are squeamish, it's the victims face)

Edited by Junior Chubb

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I wonder if The Walking Dead might be responsible for a recent surge in Zombie fear!

Such a good program, I think it might be making the zombie thing more popular. Especially as they mentioned the CDC.

Zombies aren't imposisble though, just very unlikely.

Just seems weird that an artcle that doens't mention it in the headline has 60% or more of it based on the Zombie thing jsut now. lol

I think the media is making it worse though by not reporting proper facts on the attacks. Like they keep saying it IS Bath salts with no evidence and then the first guy has been proven not to have had bath salts.

The whole thing is a mess because of the media.

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Posted (edited)

Such a good program, I think it might be making the zombie thing more popular. Especially as they mentioned the CDC.

Zombies aren't imposisble though, just very unlikely.

Just seems weird that an artcle that doens't mention it in the headline has 60% or more of it based on the Zombie thing jsut now. lol

I think the media is making it worse though by not reporting proper facts on the attacks. Like they keep saying it IS Bath salts with no evidence and then the first guy has been proven not to have had bath salts.

The whole thing is a mess because of the media.

I think parts of a Zombie epidemic are possible, just not 'head shot' being the only way to kill them. A virus could change peoples behaviour, maybe make them cannibalistic and be easily spread but not almost indestructible or rising form the dead.

I do like a good Zombie flick, and even better is waking up in the morning after a Zombie Apocalypse dream (and being able to remember the details).

Edited by Junior Chubb
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Wonder how many millions the Government spent to determine that they, "probably do not exist"? Talk about always keep an exit open just in case the odd zombie or mermaid should pop up?

Our Government at work!~!!

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Wonder how many millions the Government spent to determine that they, "probably do not exist"? Talk about always keep an exit open just in case the odd zombie or mermaid should pop up?

Our Government at work!~!!

They do not rule out Zombie Mermaids though...

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Jeeze... And I suppose unicorns don't exist either.

I wish people would leave my fantasy world alone :)

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..Hang on...who the hell's swimming in my pond then...?

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Posted (edited)

I think parts of a Zombie epidemic are possible, just not 'head shot' being the only way to kill them. A virus could change peoples behaviour, maybe make them cannibalistic and be easily spread but not almost indestructible or rising form the dead.

I do like a good Zombie flick, and even better is waking up in the morning after a Zombie Apocalypse dream (and being able to remember the details).

Yeah i tend to agree with you on that. The scary part I don't like is that if it takes away the "cortex" but leaves the rest of the brain a human will jsut be a walking, eating carcass. Just hope that if it ever did happen it's more like walking dead than 28 days later... (EUGH fast running zombies)

I've never been a huge zombie fan to be honest, I loved 28 days later and 28 weeks later for there gritty realism. The walking dead is good though, but more because of the acting and story etc.

..Hang on...who the hell's swimming in my pond then...?

You haven;t had Michael Barrymore round have you?

Edited by Coffey
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Posted (edited)

Yeah i tend to agree with you on that. The scary part I don't like is that if it takes away the "cortex" but leaves the rest of the brain a human will jsut be a walking, eating carcass. Just hope that if it ever did happen it's more like walking dead than 28 days later... (EUGH fast running zombies)

I've never been a huge zombie fan to be honest, I loved 28 days later and 28 weeks later for there gritty realism. The walking dead is good though, but more because of the acting and story etc.

28 Days Later is great (not so keen on 28 Weeks Later, but looking forward to 28 Months Later ;) ), those running zombies add a whole new dimension to the Zombie flick. I love The Walking Dead too, the character interaction can be awesome but at other times makes me want to scream (or just kill Lori or Carl), and get back to surviving the Walkers. Looking forward to Season 3.

I like the way they both begin with the lead role waking up in the hospital not knowing what has happened and we watch them learn about the new world.

You haven;t had Michael Barrymore round have you?

Lol :tu:

Edited by Junior Chubb
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Lol that they needed to point that out!

:) :) :)

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28 Days Later is great (not so keen on 28 Weeks Later, but looking forward to 28 Months Later ;) ), those running zombies add a whole new dimension to the Zombie flick. I love The Walking Dead too, the character interaction can be awesome but at other times makes me want to scream (or just kill Lori or Carl), and get back to surviving the Walkers. Looking forward to Season 3.

I like the way they both begin with the lead role waking up in the hospital not knowing what has happened and we watch them learn about the new world.

Yeah i've heard that Danny Boyle wanted to do 28 Months later in Russia. But haven't heard if that's where they are actually doing it.

I was talking to someone else on here how i was shocked how could Andrew lincoln (Rick) is in it. Been a sort of fan of his since Teachers. (and Human traffic) I didn't even realise until the second or third episode that it was him because he comes off relaly well as an American. lol ther eis definitly a lot of frustration at Karl and Lori. lol

Yeah when I first seen it, I thought of 28 days alter. It's a good idea though and does add good mystery to it.

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Posted (edited)

I would disagree, I have dated some fishy women in the past :blush: I will leave the rest to your imagination.

Edited by skookum

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Yeah i've heard that Danny Boyle wanted to do 28 Months later in Russia. But haven't heard if that's where they are actually doing it.

I was talking to someone else on here how i was shocked how could Andrew lincoln (Rick) is in it. Been a sort of fan of his since Teachers. (and Human traffic) I didn't even realise until the second or third episode that it was him because he comes off relaly well as an American. lol ther eis definitly a lot of frustration at Karl and Lori. lol

Yeah when I first seen it, I thought of 28 days alter. It's a good idea though and does add good mystery to it.

Snap on the Andrew Lincoln thing. When I first saw it I thought 'he looks like that bloke from teachers' but convinced myself it wasn't him, after a few episodes I looked on-line and low and behold. Sign of a great actor if you forget or do not recognise who they are.

I think some Brits can do a great american accent and often shock the audience when their nationality is revealed, from my experience it doesn't work so well the other way around.

28 Months Later in Russia, sounds good, fits with the last films ending.

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Great job gov't! Why not spend some time on figuring out the nations problems?

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