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Your 'on line' and 'off line' personality


Lilly

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For awhile I've been thinking about how people's personalities can be very different when they're on line (in discussion forums and chat rooms) verses how they behave in 'real life'. I know that I have marked differences in my personality. In real life I'm far more introverted, less likely to offer my opinion, generally keep to myself (especially in public). However, when offered the anonymity of on line expression I become far more outgoing and willing to engage with others. Does anyone else feel that their personality differs depending upon the medium they are using?

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For awhile I've been thinking about how people's personalities can be very different when they're on line (in discussion forums and chat rooms) verses how they behave in 'real life'. I know that I have marked differences in my personality. In real life I'm far more introverted, less likely to offer my opinion, generally keep to myself (especially in public). However, when offered the anonymity of on line expression I become far more outgoing and willing to engage with others. Does anyone else feel that their personality differs depending upon the medium they are using?

Its the same for me, but only with the real life persons, whom I don't know and just met.
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I'm trying to behave the same, on-line and off-line. Maybe I'm more kind and warm in a real life with real people. I don't mean that as an insult, but I don't believe in "best-friends-forever" thing through Facebook, e-mail etc. From my point of view the direct contact is needed for good friendship.

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Pretty much what you (don't) see is what you get... I'm much the same on-line as off, except I really don't have antlers...

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Same as on here, only i drink more offline.

Interesting topic,

Thanks,

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For awhile I've been thinking about how people's personalities can be very different when they're on line (in discussion forums and chat rooms) verses how they behave in 'real life'. I know that I have marked differences in my personality. In real life I'm far more introverted, less likely to offer my opinion, generally keep to myself (especially in public). However, when offered the anonymity of on line expression I become far more outgoing and willing to engage with others. Does anyone else feel that their personality differs depending upon the medium they are using?

If someone is mean to you in public does it provoke an automatic emotional response (anger, hate, unhappyness, etc) which is missing during online debate?

Those programmed responses can be reprogrammed away.

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If someone is mean to you in public does it provoke an automatic emotional response (anger, hate, unhappyness, etc) which is missing during online debate?

No, I *feel* very much the same in both mediums. However, I'm more likely to point out my feelings online verses simply keeping my feelings to myself (in real life).

Those programmed responses can be reprogrammed away.

I don't function via "programmed responses", I look at each situation on its own merits. Also, I have little desire to be "reprogrammed"...sounds rather sinister actually.

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With serious coversations, like politics and religion: probably even less in real life than I do on here.

With corny jokes and acting silly: more so in real life than on here.

I gotta be me. <--That and I dislike too much negativity. Don't need it in my life, no one does.

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I have a different personality when posting on a thread then I do in the chat room. That is just here on U-M.

I am also different to mostly everyone I meet and gets to know me. Everyone would probably describe me differently.

I think perhaps the reason for this is because when two people interact they form something new so my interactions are just half of the result with any given person. So with another person the end result will also be different.

Basicially no one is really interested in the things that most interest me so I end defaulting to topics that others choose or that I slide in if I feel they can be receptive.

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Eh, I'm pretty much the same online and off. :) I will say that I think my "personality" doesn't come through online as it doe IRL. Many times I have to explain (even in a heated debate) that I'm not being snarky or a smartass and am sincerely asking or saying something. IRL the "tone" comes across better. :)

I am a goof online and off. Don't take things personally (98% of the time) and try to NEVER say something hurtful or something I will regret.

Nibs

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I'm definitely more outgoing online. More inclined to join in on a conversation with strangers.

Most people I know are not very skeptical at all or interested in seeking truth.

Edited by HDesiato
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My personality is the same online and off line. I've been using chat for over 15 years, and in that time I've TRIED different personas, but it never works. I'm just me. If someone hurts my feelings online I feel just as upset as if they did it in real life. The only difference is, online I can put them on ignore or turn off the computer to make them go away, which I wish I could do sometimes in real life.

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1. No, I *feel* very much the same in both mediums. However, I'm more likely to point out my feelings online verses simply keeping my feelings to myself (in real life).

2. I don't function via "programmed responses", I look at each situation on its own merits.

3. Also, I have little desire to be "reprogrammed"...sounds rather sinister actually.

1. If your parents annoy you do you usually get them told or do you tend to pass comments under your breath and be moody?

2. It isnt a criticism of you we all function through programmed responses.

3. An example of a programmed response is someone who as a kid never kept their room tidy and now is a messy adult. If you look back at their childhood you would find one (or both) parents had no respect for the childs personal boundaries. This caused the child to rebel by being messy.

Many programmed responses in life are destructive. Social anxiety, insecurity, shyness, lack of confidence, phobias, agrophobia there is a huge range of programmed responses which arent beneficial for a person to retain. They were all triggered as coping mechanisms to get the sufferer past a disressful situation. A psychologist can reprogram away the destructive responses and replace them with healthier thought patterns.

The ultimate destructive response a huge amount of people have is stage fright. Even that can be got rid off.

Edited by Mr Right Wing
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I have difficulty talking to people I don't know, both online and off. But I am a little more open online. I think I would still rather observe than participate most of the time though.

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My online and offline are pretty similar. Except swearing, I cuss like a sailor and tend to keep it clean when online.

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1. If your parents annoy you do you usually get them told or do you tend to pass comments under your breath and be moody?

My parents are dead. Back in 'the day' when I was young we just towed the line and respected our parent's wishes.

2. It isnt a criticism of you we all function through programmed responses.

If you're talking about socialization I tend to agree. However, a great deal of how one chooses to behave is indeed under our control.

3. An example of a programmed response is someone who as a kid never kept their room tidy and now is a messy adult. If you look back at their childhood you would find one (or both) parents had no respect for the childs personal boundaries. This caused the child to rebel by being messy.

A bit of an over simplification IMO. There could be a variety of reasons why a person would choose to be messy.

Many programmed responses in life are destructive. Social anxiety, insecurity, shyness, lack of confidence, phobias, agrophobia there is a huge range of programmed responses which arent beneficial for a person to retain. They were all triggered as coping mechanisms to get the sufferer past a disressful situation. A psychologist can reprogram away the destructive responses and replace them with healthier thought patterns.

From what I know I don't think psychologists exactly "reprogram" people? I thought psychologists were supposed to make people understand their behaviour and help them to choose healthier behaviours. The point here being personal choice (verses being programmed).

Edited by Lilly
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For awhile I've been thinking about how people's personalities can be very different when they're on line (in discussion forums and chat rooms) verses how they behave in 'real life'. I know that I have marked differences in my personality. In real life I'm far more introverted, less likely to offer my opinion, generally keep to myself (especially in public). However, when offered the anonymity of on line expression I become far more outgoing and willing to engage with others. Does anyone else feel that their personality differs depending upon the medium they are using?

Yeah, totally, I'm similar, but I've been trying to be a lot more social. Awkward silence bugs me though, and I find myself running off at the mouth sometimes.

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The ultimate destructive response a huge amount of people have is stage fright. Even that can be got rid off.

Had that in speech class until I figured out how to use the 'shot' method. Before every speech, slam a shot of Jager, you'll be fine.

I actually did much better when slightly buzzed. :tu:

Edited by Spid3rCyd3
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Eh, I'm pretty much the same online and off. :) I will say that I think my "personality" doesn't come through online as it doe IRL. Many times I have to explain (even in a heated debate) that I'm not being snarky or a smartass and am sincerely asking or saying something. IRL the "tone" comes across better. :)

I am a goof online and off. Don't take things personally (98% of the time) and try to NEVER say something hurtful or something I will regret.

Nibs

I thought i was pretty much the same offline and online, but I'm told that my personality doesn't always come through in words. That I am far more goofier offline, less blunt, and certain endearing quirks to my personality that don't get to shine through with word form that perhaps help soften the bluntness perceived online. But I know in myself that I can be far more intelligible and expressive with my words and emotionally open in written form, but i think that's true for most people because writing makes us process our thoughts. My offline personality is more introverted in that sense.

Although I only really count "online presence" as being email, IM, and forums. I think with skype it takes things back into "offline presence" mode, because all your tones and external expressions can be seen and heard.

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Off line I am more politically correct. A personality like mine can't really translate to the internet. I'm kind of a quirky person. Like everyone said my body movements are weird. One of my teacher's said I reminded her of the original Nutty professor. I'n real life I'm not really introverted or extroverted. I kind of just stay quiet but if someone talks to me I don't sound "meek" or anything. I'm pretty loud and friendly. I will easily carry a conversation and make people laugh. I talk very fast.This is all in like the idea situation. I only type like 60 words a minute. I think faster then that so my sentences on the internet are always messed up. Which is why I edit alot. Some of my friends say I have conversations with myself that are directed at other people. Just imagine all the edits I made in a post. But I'm saying out loud really fast to someone. I really can go on forever if I have too.

Is it just me or do the sentences in this paragraph don't really translate well. I am terrible at organizing thoughts. My thoughts are the same way in real life. I am terrible as changing topics skillfully or translating to different subjects. Unless I put lots of conscience thought into it.

I usually come to the internet when I'm annoyed or unhappy. Because the internet always has funny cat meme's and discussions to distract me.

I'm also really terrible at internet jokes. I can never make anyone laugh over the internet. So I come off as rigid.

Edited by Kazoo
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Off line I am more politically correct. A personality like mine can't really translate to the internet. I'm kind of a quirky person. Like everyone said my body movements are weird. One of my teacher's said I reminded her of the original Nutty professor. I'n real life I'm not really introverted or extroverted. I kind of just stay quiet but if someone talks to me I don't sound "meek" or anything. I'm pretty loud and friendly. I will easily carry a conversation and make people laugh. I talk very fast.This is all in like the idea situation. I only type like 60 words a minute. I think faster then that so my sentences on the internet are always messed up. Which is why I edit alot. Some of my friends say I have conversations with myself that are directed at other people. Just imagine all the edits I made in a post. But I'm saying out loud really fast to someone. I really can go on forever if I have too.

Is it just me or do the sentences in this paragraph don't really translate well. I am terrible at organizing thoughts. My thoughts are the same way in real life. I am terrible as changing topics skillfully or translating to different subjects. Unless I put lots of conscience thought into it.

I usually come to the internet when I'm annoyed or unhappy. Because the internet always has funny cat meme's and discussions to distract me.

I'm also really terrible at internet jokes. I can never make anyone laugh over the internet. So I come off as rigid.

You seem alright to me man, I didn't have any trouble following along. I edit almost every post as well, so no worries there. Except my editing comes from trying to rephrase everything I say so that what I'm actually saying is correct and not a convoluted mess of random thoughts, I do that sometimes. :blink:

Edited by Spid3rCyd3
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