ReaperS_ParadoX Posted October 21, 2012 #76 Share Posted October 21, 2012 The Far Side as a parenting manual: Some similarities/variations on existing themes: "Step on a crack - break your momma's back" - If Devo said it then it must be true... "Seeds will grow in your stomach" - in the days before seedless varieties this made eating watermelons very time-consuming. It took me years to overcome a fear of passionfruit. Confusion over guerrillas/gorillas - "Why are they fighting monkeys?!?" "Gum doesn't digest and will get stuck in your stomach" "Fear and respect the escalator": "Sitting too close to the TV will make you go blind" - I suppose that is better than "Move your fat head!" A couple of new ones: "Eat your bread crusts and your hair will grow curly" - supposedly a good thing... Frogs give you warts. The Far Side as a parenting manual: Some similarities/variations on existing themes: "Step on a crack - break your momma's back" - If Devo said it then it must be true... "Seeds will grow in your stomach" - in the days before seedless varieties this made eating watermelons very time-consuming. It took me years to overcome a fear of passionfruit. Confusion over guerrillas/gorillas - "Why are they fighting monkeys?!?" "Gum doesn't digest and will get stuck in your stomach" "Fear and respect the escalator": [media=]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gwGcP8QbH8 "Sitting too close to the TV will make you go blind" - I suppose that is better than "Move your fat head!" A couple of new ones: "Eat your bread crusts and your hair will grow curly" - supposedly a good thing... Frogs give you warts. I know for a fact that the Frogs give you warts one is a myth, because my cousin had a swamp in his backyard and all the time we would go and catch frogs, I never developed any warts. Oh and Im very careful on the escalators when I was younger I always had this fear that I would get a shoelace caught in one and it would tear me apart :w00t: 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
little_dreamer Posted October 22, 2012 #77 Share Posted October 22, 2012 "If you swallow your gum, it will take 7 years to digest it". "Drinking coffee will stunt your growth" "There was a woman who had her toes caught in the escalator..." Because of this story, my eyes are totally fixed on the escalator as I'm getting off it, obsessed with not making a wrong move so it doesn't happen to me. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImaLoner Posted October 22, 2012 #78 Share Posted October 22, 2012 "There was a woman who had her toes caught in the escalator..." Because of this story, my eyes are totally fixed on the escalator as I'm getting off it, obsessed with not making a wrong move so it doesn't happen to me. To you and all those who mentioned escalators.. I remembered years ago watching this episode of Rescue 911 (It was the only episode which stuck in my head after all of these years): [media=]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L9XsBo7u-bE[/media] 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
little_dreamer Posted October 23, 2012 #79 Share Posted October 23, 2012 To you and all those who mentioned escalators.. I remembered years ago watching this episode of Rescue 911 (It was the only episode which stuck in my head after all of these years): Hmm. The mother just lets her son just sit on the escalator. I wonder if she gave him plastic dry cleaning bags to play with as a child as well. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReaperS_ParadoX Posted October 23, 2012 #80 Share Posted October 23, 2012 (edited) To you and all those who mentioned escalators.. I remembered years ago watching this episode of Rescue 911 (It was the only episode which stuck in my head after all of these years): [media=]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L9XsBo7u-bE[/media] WOW Im glad the kid is okay....But Its just like the Mallrats video said Edited October 23, 2012 by R4z3rsPar4d0x 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImaLoner Posted October 23, 2012 #81 Share Posted October 23, 2012 WOW Im glad the kid is okay....But Its just like the Mallrats video said True. I couldn't agree more. Hmm. The mother just lets her son just sit on the escalator. I wonder if she gave him plastic dry cleaning bags to play with as a child as well. I thought along those same lines. If that happened this day and age, that mom would be charged with neglect at the very least. I've always been overprotective with my kids, and even then they had accidents (mostly when their dad was supposed to be watching them, but I digress). I admit I've scared my kids with the escalator story, actually mentioning the kid in the Rescue 911 video. My mom did her fair share of warnings, while my Papa would be like, just let her do this or that, she'll learn... lol 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catz Posted October 23, 2012 #82 Share Posted October 23, 2012 My mom use to say (maybe it was my granny - I can't remember) that playing with matches will cause you to pee in your bed; I should eat avocado as it makes you smart; If you had a wart, you should expose it to a full moon and it will fall off; (I never had a wart so I could not test that one) Swallowing chewing gum will knot your intestines; If I don't brush my teeth, the tooth mouse will not bring me any money when I place the tooth in my shoe next to my bed (I really believed this, I use to write letters to the mouse, telling him where to walk as to avoid my cat. My mom would then write letters back on the mouse's behalf :-) I also firmly believed in Santa Clause. Of course, If I was not well behaved, I was told that Santa would not bring me any gifts! I once even hid behind a chair as I wanted to see him so badly. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
little_dreamer Posted October 24, 2012 #83 Share Posted October 24, 2012 If I don't brush my teeth, the tooth mouse will not bring me any money when I place the tooth in my shoe next to my bed (I really believed this, I use to write letters to the mouse, telling him where to walk as to avoid my cat. My mom would then write letters back on the mouse's behalf :-) Over here kids are told about the tooth fairy that leaves money under your pillow if you leave the tooth there. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eldorado Posted October 24, 2012 #84 Share Posted October 24, 2012 If there's a sudden change in wind your miserable face could stay like that forever, so you're better smiling. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eldorado Posted October 24, 2012 #85 Share Posted October 24, 2012 Over here kids are told about the tooth fairy that leaves money under your pillow if you leave the tooth there. The Tooth Fairy has been outed as a predatory paedophile, over here. It will be Santa next, no doubt. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meryt-tetisheri Posted October 24, 2012 #86 Share Posted October 24, 2012 The Tooth Fairy has been outed as a predatory paedophile, over here. It will be Santa next, no doubt. How sad and arid would children's lives be if adults strip away all the magic, enchantment and imagination?! They are children for only a few precious years, adults for the rest of their lives... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wyverna Posted October 28, 2012 #87 Share Posted October 28, 2012 My parents weren't big myth tellers. For me, it was always the big kid that wanted to mess with me. One kid told me when I was about seven about Bloody Mary and it absolutely terrified me. I would always close the bathroom doors so I wouldn't see the mirror. But my parents have a mirror and sink connected to their room (the toilet and shower is behind a door) so I was always scared to death of my parents room because I couldn't trap Mary behind a door. Even today, their room still has a strangely ominous feeling to me. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catz Posted October 30, 2012 #88 Share Posted October 30, 2012 If there's a sudden change in wind your miserable face could stay like that forever, so you're better smiling. I remember, I was told If I pulled a face, that when the church bell rings, my face would stay like that forever! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Waffles Posted December 13, 2012 #89 Share Posted December 13, 2012 The Far Side as a parenting manual: Some similarities/variations on existing themes: "Step on a crack - break your momma's back" - If Devo said it then it must be true... "Seeds will grow in your stomach" - in the days before seedless varieties this made eating watermelons very time-consuming. It took me years to overcome a fear of passionfruit. Confusion over guerrillas/gorillas - "Why are they fighting monkeys?!?" "Gum doesn't digest and will get stuck in your stomach" "Fear and respect the escalator": [media=]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gwGcP8QbH8[/media] "Sitting too close to the TV will make you go blind" - I suppose that is better than "Move your fat head!" A couple of new ones: "Eat your bread crusts and your hair will grow curly" - supposedly a good thing... Frogs give you warts. Yes! It all makes sense now... My parents are both gary Larson fans 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReaperS_ParadoX Posted December 17, 2012 #90 Share Posted December 17, 2012 "If you swallow your gum, it will take 7 years to digest it". "Drinking coffee will stunt your growth" "There was a woman who had her toes caught in the escalator..." Because of this story, my eyes are totally fixed on the escalator as I'm getting off it, obsessed with not making a wrong move so it doesn't happen to me. I wonder if that gum one is true Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sean93 Posted December 18, 2012 #91 Share Posted December 18, 2012 If you don't sleep, Johnny Dark will get you...I was told this as a child and being an insomniac it was never good. If you sneeze and burp at the same times your eyes pop out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vikachu Posted January 3, 2013 #92 Share Posted January 3, 2013 I got, eat your bread crusts so that you can have curly hair. Don't sit to close to the tv or else your eyes will turn square. The usual parents have eyes on the back of their heads. And this one I still hear to this day from my grandparents, never walk around barefoot or you won't be able to have children. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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