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Bling

Can atheists and religious lovers be happy?

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The question I'd like to ask is 'Can Atheists and religious followers have a happy relationship together?' Do their virtually opposite views cause too much of a gap between them for they to ever have a deep and meaningful relationship? When I say 'relationship', I'm talking about love and marriage not just friendship. If you fell in love with someone of another faith/no faith - would you convert in order to maintain your relationship?

Please read this article for more ideas, but this discussion is not just about christians:

http://opinionatedat...te-a-christian/

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The only way I see it is if they are liberal in their beliefs.

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Many people 'of faith' finding themselves in a long term relationship, involving one faith and another, one will usually convert to the other.

Between atheists and theists? I think, not so much and the relationship is usually shorter term.

However, when it does work, neither parties are so black and white. They're usually agnostics hidden behind their own religious/cultural differences. They just eventually meet in the middle.

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I guess it really all depends on how passionate they are as far as their beliefs are concerned (and when I say "they" I mean the religious person, because I doubt the atheist is going to make a big deal out of something that his partner believes in that he takes as seriously as a fairy tale, where the religious person might believe some crazy notion about their partner going to hell for eternity for not believing in their personal belief).

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I broke up with a Muslim who wanted to marry me because he was adamant about me converting, and I couldn't do it. He was the best guy I ever had.... We saw eye to eye on many spiritual matters, but I would not accept being a Muslim, knowing he would want me to cover my head and wouldn't allow me to take (our) my children to a Christian church or teach them my concepts about Jesus. Because God means soooo much to me, I think it would be hard not to share that with my partner. I love to be able to talk about these type of things with people and I would hope that my partner would be one of my bests friends. If we didn't have that spiritual side in common, I think it would be so hard to relate. I have made my mind up not to be with a partner that I cannot be myself around. If I had to stiffle my relationship with God in order to get along, it wouldn't be worth it for me....

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I'll need an Atheist girlfriend - any volunteers? It's FOR SCIENCE after all ;)

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My fiance and I are doing fine. She is an Atheist, I am Pagan. I don't really talk about my beliefs, she doesn't come down on me about things. We do talk about various science topics a good bit, which is always fun to talk about.

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The only way I see it is if they are liberal in their beliefs.

Yeah...pretty much.

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I'll need an Atheist girlfriend - any volunteers? It's FOR SCIENCE after all ;)

lol, something tells me that this does not bode well for said atheist girls. :D

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I think as long as both sides simply explain their beliefs and then allow the other side the same opportunity, and accept the Free Will of whatever they both decide... then things can be fine. Christians are expected to be like Christ... Jesus... and Jesus did not foce convert anyone, he simply talked to everyone and performed miricles to prove his divine nature. That Christians have to try to convert people is bunk, and is spread by Bad Christians who thiink they are doing good, but actually they are causing people great hurt with their actions.

I respect the Jehova's Witness in that way, if you tell them to go away, they go away. They might come back, but simply tell them to go again and they do. Same with most Mormons. It is the Prespiterian Bible Thumping Brimstone Breathers that are really bad in this respect. The point should be Choice. Everyone should have the Choice, but it is OK if you simply want to talk to someone and explain your belief.

Likewise, I've met some militant Atheists who have campaigned huge circus side shows to try to get Christmas symbolism taken out of peoples yards and to get the word God taken off memorials on government land... They are idiots, also causing much more harm then good.

Edited by DieChecker
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My wife is catholic. I'm .... Well whatever i am.... My oldest has started religous education. I was a little irked at first... I will not let my son be indoctrinated, but so far all they do is sing songs about being kind to one another and other universally spiritual things. I know the day is comeing when he tells the priest after he dies he wants to come back as an eagle and his dad wants to be an oak tree..... But we will cross that bridge when we get there.

It will get interesting when he is older and we discuss scholarly inturpretations of the bible, and actual history.

Edited by Seeker79
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I think it only becomes an issue when the storm is here. And every life has storms. I think it would be rare for it to last without one or the other changing their beliefs.

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I am a catholic and my partner is buddhist .. We have been together for almost 7 years ..

So yeah, I don't think that this is a problem .. Quite the opposite .. I love seeing them perform their little rituals and it's always nice to see them celebrate their festivals .. I like taking part in them ..

If the two people are tollerant of each other's religious systems and beliefs, I think it could be quite productive ..

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i dont see why not.

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I would never get involved with anyone who was too much of a fundamentalist and bent on converting.. I view that as selfish and arrogant..it is if they keep harping at you and try and force you... I hold no interest in following any man made religion...I will not try and stop anyone from being what they love, but as long as they don't try and change me.

I detest anyone trying to convert me to any church or faith, just like I detest anyone trying to change me as a person and preach nonsense at me..I never buy the sugar coated reason either.( yet I love a bargin lol ) ..Way I see it is, if I do not care to change a person and convert them, then they should treat me the same way...

Edited by Beckys_Mom
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It depends on so many things. My eldest niece has recently married a muslim. I would classify her as "spiritual angling toward agnostic" with catholic leanings, way left of myself I guess. Prior to the nuptials there was pressure from the future mother in law to convert and my niece actually considered going through the process for the sake of peace and so that an Iman could complete the ceremony. It was her husband that finally put an end to those plans by stating that as he is hardly a devoted practicing muslim himself it is ridiculous that she should have to conform to something he couldn't care less if she believed or not - so they married with a legal registrar on a tropical island under great protest from all those who thought they were shirking tradition on both sides of the fence - good for them, it was a truly beautiful wedding.

It didn't end there though, pressure kept coming as to how the kids would be raised. Very proud of my new nephew, he made it perfectly clear to all and sundry that that would be a matter for himself and his wife to decide and they will let us (mostly the mother on his side) know what they have decided is right for THEIR children when the time arrives :w00t: .

Edited by libstaK
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It depends on so many things. My eldest niece has recently married a muslim. I would classify her as "spiritual angling toward agnostic" with catholic leanings, way left of myself I guess. Prior to the nuptials there was pressure from the future mother in law to convert and my niece actually considered going through the process for the sake of peace and so that an Iman could complete the ceremony. It was her husband that finally put an end to those plans by stating that as he is hardly a devoted practicing muslim himself it is ridiculous that she should have to conform to something he couldn't care less if she believed or not - so they married with a legal registrar on a tropical island under great protest from all those who thought they were shirking tradition on both sides of the fence - good for them, it was a truly beautiful wedding.

It didn't end there though, pressure kept coming as to how the kids would be raised. Very proud of my new nephew, he made it perfectly clear to all and sundry that that would be a matter for himself and his wife to decide and they will let us (mostly the mother on his side) know what they have decided is right for THEIR children when the time arrives :w00t: .

For some reason I enjoyed reading that.. It reaked of freedom and we will do as we please, nuts to those who protest... Good for them..I like people who love their freedom and care not what others think..

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Could probably go out with an agnostic but not an atheist, atheists are rude with out noticing there impolite (nothing to do with there beliefs).

i could probably go out with a pagan as they seem like nature lovers and are sensitive in general, love some pagans more than some Christians.

Probably couldnt go out with morman or muslims as there religion in there eyes is a continuation of mine.

p.s i do know some atheists who i could go out with just not militant ones.

Edited by Ever Learning

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I think it depends on the degree of a couple's maturity and mutual respect, and also on the amount of 'space' they allow each other to have. Attempts to convert will usually not stop at questions of faith because they are in essence attempts to dominate. Unless each partner can fully accept the other, ideosyncracies warts and all, without feeling threatened or having the impulse to 'correct' the other, the relationship is doomed anyway. If it's not faith it will be politics or even diet!

edit: typos

Edited by meryt-tetisheri

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Yes. It is about respecting eachothers beliefs. I do not believe in God, my wife is a Christian (though she kind of considers herself more of a deist or theist now.) She goes to chuch without. If I do have to go I just act respectfully and do not partake in communion. We plan to raise the kids Christian. My older son is baptized, and it is in the plans for the younger one in the next couple of months. We have a perfectly happy family.

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atheists are rude with out noticing there impolite (nothing to do with there beliefs).

Eh? They are rude based on what then, if it's not their beliefs? How many atheists have you met that you're basing this opinion on?

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Luckily for me my fiance is also an atheist, and has never been involved in religion. I have dated christians while I was an atheist and I've been a christian who got involved with a non believer - he converted to my church....but it was a big mistake. I would never be involved in a romantic relationship with a believer - whatever faith, because I feel the fundamental core attitude to life is way too different. I want a harmonious relationship, not one where there's always an elephant in the room. Christians can nice people to have relationships with and so can atheists, but in my experience having polar opposite beliefs (which is what an atheist and believer has) it's no basis for a long lasting relationship.

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My husband is Agnostic, now leaning towards being a believer even though he was an Atheist when we first married. I am, as you probably already know Roman Catholic. It's never been a problem between us and love blossomed despite of our differences. Our children have been brought up RC and my husband has supported this all through our kids childhood. I don't preach to him or the kids which would be unfair of me, so I have respected his views too. I rarely talk about religion but he knows that I am faithful to God and he respects that about me. So, yes love can thrive, if you show respect to one another.

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My husband is Agnostic, now leaning towards being a believer even though he was an Atheist when we first married. I am, as you probably already know Roman Catholic. It's never been a problem between us and love blossomed despite of our differences. Our children have been brought up RC and my husband has supported this all through our kids childhood. I don't preach to him or the kids which would be unfair of me, so I have respected his views too. I rarely talk about religion but he knows that I am faithful to God and he respects that about me. So, yes love can thrive, if you show respect to one another.

That's lovely to hear. How long has it taken him to 'lean towards being a believer'? Do you think he's changed his beliefs because he's with you? :)

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The question I'd like to ask is 'Can Atheists and religious followers have a happy relationship together?' Do their virtually opposite views cause too much of a gap between them for they to ever have a deep and meaningful relationship? When I say 'relationship', I'm talking about love and marriage not just friendship. If you fell in love with someone of another faith/no faith - would you convert in order to maintain your relationship?

Please read this article for more ideas, but this discussion is not just about christians:

http://opinionatedat...te-a-christian/

as long as the relationship isn't based predominantly on their faith or lack of. there are a lot of couples who don't share the same belief system whether that be differing religions or as in this case, one who believes in god and one who does not.

i don't think god has anything to do with marriage or coupleship.

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