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Still Waters

Is too much praise good for you?

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I can understand it, kind of relates to this:

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Positive reinforcement is very helpful, but I suppose it can be overdone. I think some youth today are made to think each and every one is special.

If everybody is special, then what happens to "common" or "normal"?

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The term "special" is rather arbitrary and subjective considering that it only applies when someone else makes that determination to an otherwise ordinary person, which is what we all are, really.

Sometimes I think that the only time some kids get any sort of "positive" reinforcement is when they're in school or perhaps at work and the rest of the time they are just..well, doing what they're supposed to do. Is it good or bad? I don't know. What I do observe is an increasing amount and frequency of meaningless phrases being tossed out by those in "authority" then expecting everyone to immediately feel good about the useless verbal scraps they are being given.

So it seems that praise is also subjective since it depends on what the other person deems worthy of any praise...we can't escape being judged, can we?

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Praises can boost up attitude and confidence but too much praise all the time can also make a man blind from seeing his flaws and improving them. Anyway, too much of anything is not really good. The same concept applies here.

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I believe it is how the praise (or lack of which) is TAKEN by the reciever of it.

There is one school of thought- Hardly ever praise them and they will work much harder for it and become accustomed to that, then they will not pout and give up, for being spoiled with too many rewards would lead one to expect too much for too little. It be better to teach them the opposite so that they GREATLY APPRECIATE the rewards they ARE given, no matter how small, and be the most efficient.

Then the OTHER school of thought- We (people) are only taught by two true teachers at the neural level. PLEASURE and PAIN. And as we are made to feel a reward mechanism when we do something, those networks become reinforced and make us better at it. And as far as the spiritual level goes, I think we all know how to put ourselves in a state of enjoyment when we are doing something that gives us a rhythm.. Feels like when you hear the best music and you just HAVE to move to it. And whatever we are doing, we are masters at it, as long as we stay in that state.

Both sides have shown tremendous results, and having trained many people at different jobs, I've learned from experience that women USUALLY advance faster when being complimented for what they did right and men USUALLY advance faster when being pointed out what they did wrong. Not always, just USUALLY, and though I believe in not discriminating in ANY way based on gender, we have to face it, we arent exactly the same, ladies and gentlemen. LOL

I think the key to which direction is efficient or works best lies somewhere in the RECIEVER (worker) not the method itself.

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lol I work better without praise, praise makes me complacent with what I am doing. I no longer go from what works best to hey ok this is good enough I guess. Less likely to change my ways for the better. Need to have the balance of bad remarks as well so I can show fools that they are wrong which makes me go outside of my normal way of thinking :P

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Praise can be a detriment as it can boost ego and promote arrogance in the wrong person.

But it can also positively boost confidence in the right person, and as the article implied, improve task performance.

People have psychological needs such as self-esteem needs.

If you want your kid to live up to its full potential in life you need to give it positive recognition, positve status and positive praise. Giving them high self-esteem doesnt make them elitest or arrogant. Teaching them not to be considerate towards others does. That means dont let them see you putting down others who are below you but let them see you showing understanding for their circumstances.

Try pointing out a few positive things to them each week so they believe they are special instead of defective or merely normal. If they believe they are special they will go far in life.

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Try pointing out a few positive things to them each week so they believe they are special instead of defective or merely normal. If they believe they are special they will go far in life.

I do not think the aim should ever be to make them feel special as I think this is a detriment to their development. Instead they could be helped to feel competent instead. That goes farther than the "special" label we slap on them.

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I don't know let me call you an idiot and see if that increases your self esteem. I'm not completely serious, I have no way of knowing if you are idiot. Notice, I said I'm not completely serious. Why do people rely so much as psycho babble and all those blessed studies which are subject to certain conditions and only represent a fraction of humankind?

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