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ambelamba

In my case, it's personal.

31 posts in this topic

Anybody in here whose life was wrecked by following the scriptural teachings? Count me in.

Jesus said that if you lust after a woman you are committing adultery. Adultery is a sin. And wage of sin is death. Or, His judgment of 'love' is quick and swift. My life was driven by fear and reverence of God. God was my lord, master, and shogun. And following that teaching wrecked my life. It destroyed my career and everything. For last ten years I've been trying to rebuild my life from the ground. But once shattered the life won't be put back together easily.

Maybe it's my prejudice but I noticed that many of you on the forums have really, really minimal or non-existent libido. Probably I am an exception in here. And that Seattle rocker guy, too. I am not saying that promiscuity is good. It's not necessarily toxic, but it will make you desensitized and jaded ending up making yourself dull to the happiness of relationships and such.

(I am not that young. But I am very youthful for my age and except for the diabetes (caused by bad medicine) I am doing OK. 5'10" and 185 lbs with minimal body fat ratio. I avoid sweets and do not eat candies, unless I get dizzy and hungry from daily two-hour hiking. I am not bad looking either. But I am socially retarded. Well, it's more like I became withdrawn over years. Although my avatar is THAT guy Ron Jeremy, he and I have virtually nothing in common. I am a youthful-looking Asian with BFA in art. I served in the military, which gave me some perspective. And...I can count number of the girlfriends I slept with my one hand. But that's just because of my stoic nature and lack of social skills.)

But, seriously my hatred toward Jesus is very personal. His teaching wrecked my life. How can I get it back? I lost my career and everything. And it's all caused by faithful to that teaching by Jesus. I tried to purge out lust from my mind to please God and well, my mind was wrecked and I got into a major meltdown. Who will pay for my damage? Who will avenge my misfortune?

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I dont wanna sound mean but you took this way to serious.but you at least you are fixing it.and iam sorry for saying it

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Are you saying Jesus wrecked your life because you refused to indulge in some sin? Because of a tryst that never happened?

Maybe you are simply misguided in believing sex holds all of life's answers. Well it dont. Life is bigger than batting averages. Only losers keep the score, remember that.

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Ah...I don't want to reveal what really happened. But I can tell you that it caused a major mental meltdown and eventually destroyed my military career.

Unfortunately, I was a very literal person filled with fear of God. Yes, I was a legalistic Christian thanks to the upbringing. There's a lot of things that I did not reveal about myself. Please don't judge me too quick.

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And yeah, coolguy got it right. I took it too seriously because I was a very literal person.

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I was under the impression Jesus wanted people who cared more about love than legalistic righteousness. Legalistic righteousness was the way of the Pharisees and Jesus clashed with them often because of their refusal to put love and the spirit of the law before the letter of the law. Sorry to hear about your experiences, it's good that you're beginning to rebuild your life. It's just sad that it took something this dramatic and fateful to bring you to where you are.

I know my comments are probably empty to you right now, I still wanted to share them with you nonetheless :)

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I was under the impression Jesus wanted people who cared more about love than legalistic righteousness. Legalistic righteousness was the way of the Pharisees and Jesus clashed with them often because of their refusal to put love and the spirit of the law before the letter of the law. Sorry to hear about your experiences, it's good that you're beginning to rebuild your life. It's just sad that it took something this dramatic and fateful to bring you to where you are.

I know my comments are probably empty to you right now, I still wanted to share them with you nonetheless :)

Ironically, it was Pharisees who cared about the spirit of the law than Jesus did.

Sometimes I get the impression that Jesus was even more legalistic than any others combined. Look, what I wanted to hear is the similar cases. There has to be someone who dug deep into the teachings of the Bible and got burned hard.

Edited by Ron Jeremy

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Ironically, it was Pharisees who cared about the spirit of the law than Jesus did.

Sometimes I get the impression that Jesus was even more legalistic than any others combined. Look, what I wanted to hear is the similar cases. There has to be someone who dug deep into the teachings of the Bible and got burned hard.

Incorrect, the Pharisees had hearts of stone and not a heart of flesh. They knew the law but failed to grasp it. What it represented. A HUMBLE relationship between God and man with sacrifices, and a HUMBLE relationship between man and man with sacrifices. In other words, they followed the law with the absence of love but were judgmental and were a pious self-righteous lot. Their ego were not humbled and lowered by the law, but rather their ego were raised and uplifted by the law.

Edited by B Jenkins

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Your not the real Ron Jeremy are you? If you are the real Ron Jeremy then congratulations for lasting so long with women if you know what I am talking about.

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Incorrect, the Pharisees had hearts of stone and not a heart of flesh. They knew the law but failed to grasp it. What it represented. A HUMBLE relationship between God and man with sacrifices, and a HUMBLE relationship between man and man with sacrifices. In other words, they followed the law with the absence of love but were judgmental and were a pious self-righteous lot. Their ego were not humbled and lowered by the law, but rather their ego were raised and uplifted by the law.

So you believe how the Gospels paint Pharisees. I won't argue with that.

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Ironically, it was Pharisees who cared about the spirit of the law than Jesus did.

Sometimes I get the impression that Jesus was even more legalistic than any others combined. Look, what I wanted to hear is the similar cases. There has to be someone who dug deep into the teachings of the Bible and got burned hard.

Clearly this is an important subject to you, so I won't debate the issue of the Pharisees with you. Regardless, my commiserations from the last post remain true. I can't speak for others, but for myself, digging into the teachings of the Bible did not lead me to get burned. I feel the only way that one could get burned doing so would be to take things far too extreme, removing the element of love. You have written several times in this thread about fear. In my opinion, a fear-based life is no life at all and will lead to a path of destruction. I do not believe Jesus ever intended us to live a fear-based life. It was always supposed to be a life rooted in love. If your experience led you somewhere else, then I am sorry for how that turned out for you.

With that said, I wish you the best in the future.

~ Regards, PA

Edited by Paranoid Android
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So you believe how the Gospels paint Pharisees. I won't argue with that.

Yes I do. But I got it abit wrong it is not sacrifices, it is mercy and love.

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Maybe it's my prejudice but I noticed that many of you on the forums have really, really minimal or non-existent libido. Probably I am an exception in here. And that Seattle rocker guy, too. I am not saying that promiscuity is good. It's not necessarily toxic, but it will make you desensitized and jaded ending up making yourself dull to the happiness of relationships and such.

The forums aren't really a place to exercise your libido. The internet is full of enough filth and it's good to have a place where it's relatively clean.

Having said that, there are flirtatious posts on a lot of threads which is all good, however I think anything more than that would be inappropriate. I think that most users know this and know that there are boundaries you shouldn't really cross within most threads.

If you want to discuss that kind of thing then there is probably an appropriate place on the message boards but I'd be careful how you express yourself.

I just can't take your post seriously under the name 'Ron Jeremy' - it seems almost like you're trolling here? But if what you say is true, then you most likely won't get back what you had, you'll need to rebuild. But that's not saying that what you rebuild won't be better than what you had. No one will pay for it and no one will avenge it, but you could think of it positively in that you have realised these things sooner rather than later and you have time to rebuild and get past it.

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The forums aren't really a place to exercise your libido. The internet is full of enough filth and it's good to have a place where it's relatively clean.

Having said that, there are flirtatious posts on a lot of threads which is all good, however I think anything more than that would be inappropriate. I think that most users know this and know that there are boundaries you shouldn't really cross within most threads.

If you want to discuss that kind of thing then there is probably an appropriate place on the message boards but I'd be careful how you express yourself.

I just can't take your post seriously under the name 'Ron Jeremy' - it seems almost like you're trolling here? But if what you say is true, then you most likely won't get back what you had, you'll need to rebuild. But that's not saying that what you rebuild won't be better than what you had. No one will pay for it and no one will avenge it, but you could think of it positively in that you have realised these things sooner rather than later and you have time to rebuild and get past it.

The reason why chose this avatar and nickname was to rebel against the la-la land atmosphere of UM forums.

I joined UM because of the UFO subforum. But I got quickly disillusioned. Then I moved down to S&S. Too many self-proclaimed mystics, saints, prophets and whatnot. I felt sick of it and wanted to p*** them off. So I intentionally chose this persona. Having said that, I have noticed that there are many asexuals in here. Something inevitable? Maybe.

Edited by Ron Jeremy

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:........

*sighs*

I think many people ,are led down a path,be its religious or spiritual ,and in the end ,they feel disillusioned by what following this path ,did to their life as a whole.

Generally ,it is no ones fault ,and the person who feels wrong ,must pick themselves up,dust themself off ,and start anew .

To feel betrayed,and like you lost part of your life ,is natural ,but....my advice ,is to put it behind you .Dwelling on what is done ,keeps you from moving forward .

I know people who left Israel for this reason . I know people who became atheists,or switched religions . Some did well,some still floundered .

You must realize ,you are much more than any religion you practice ,or job that you do .

We tend to box ourselves in with labels .

You should identify who ,YOU ARE ,not label yourself by anyone else's tenants .

Figure out what your priorities are .Why they are priorities ,and make it your own .

People put down my beliefs ,yadda yadda ,but they make perfect sense ,to me. I need no ones approval ,and I am content this way.

It may take you a while to get to contentment ,but you need to figure it out ,and let past misgivings ,go....

PS ,plenty of people on this forum have a libido . The fact you identify yourself with Ron Jeremy ,is one of the things you should let go .

Change your name and avatar.

You want to have the life of a pornstar ,to make up for something .....

???? Be you .

. Just my thoughts on it .

Edited by Simbi Laveau
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:........

*sighs*

I think many people ,are led down a path,be its religious or spiritual ,and in the end ,they feel disillusioned by what following this path ,did to their life as a whole.

Generally ,it is no ones fault ,and the person who feels wrong ,must pick themselves up,dust themself off ,and start anew .

To feel betrayed,and like you lost part of your life ,is natural ,but....my advice ,is to put it behind you .Dwelling on what is done ,keeps you from moving forward .

I know people who left Israel for this reason . I know people who became atheists,or switched religions . Some did well,some still floundered .

You must realize ,you are much more than any religion you practice ,or job that you do .

We tend to box ourselves in with labels .

You should identify who ,YOU ARE ,not label yourself by anyone else's tenants .

Figure out what your priorities are .Why they are priorities ,and make it your own .

People put down my beliefs ,yadda yadda ,but they make perfect sense ,to me. I need no ones approval ,and I am content this way.

It may take you a while to get to contentment ,but you need to figure it out ,and let past misgivings ,go....

Great post. Thank you.

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I'm sorry for what happened and I'm glad you're getting back on track.

Jesus' teaching does seem more legalistic than loving. I mean equating the 'thought' of doing something (regardless of how fleeting) with the deed itself, well that's always struck me as both problematic and foolish. The two are not the same by any stretch of the imagination and jesus treating them as such doesn't strike me as 'loving'. Imagine our justice system. If everyonne that thought of doing something, even if they'd never actually do it, was but in jail, everyone would be in prison. (And we'd have no hesitation saying it was because the system got more legalistic, not moving loving.) To me it just seems like the only purpose it serves is to make doubly sure that everyone is guilty of something. it's sad really and you're most likely not the only one that's suffered because of it.

Edited by shadowhive

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I'm a sinner but God who knows the future and He also knows what's in my heart. Knowing that I'm a sinner makes me feel humble and compassionate but I'm very thankful to God I can still perform sometimes with the help of medication. It's not always going to be like that you know the older I get with blood pressure. We also get double messages in our society like guys have to be great lovers. Intimacy out of wedlock hasn't ruined my life but I have rough times stories because of it. I also believe true repentence coming from the heart is a grace from God just like being a Christian but I feel in my heart that making love is a natural urge. Jesus is also about love. The lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world. Jesus before the cross compared to Jesus after crucifiction.

Edited by euroninja

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The reason why chose this avatar and nickname was to rebel against the la-la land atmosphere of UM forums.

I joined UM because of the UFO subforum. But I got quickly disillusioned. Then I moved down to S&S. Too many self-proclaimed mystics, saints, prophets and whatnot. I felt sick of it and wanted to p*** them off. So I intentionally chose this persona. Having said that, I have noticed that there are many asexuals in here. Something inevitable? Maybe.

I've been on this forum since 2005. In that time, I may have met two people who could be described as "mystics" (self-proclaimed or otherwise). I've met several people claiming to be prophets (mostly dealing with end of the world stuff - eg, 21st December, 2012, or perhaps the "God Code" type person), and most of these are ignored and then discarded once the particular date is passed. I can't say as I recall any "saints" (self-proclaimed or otherwise). I certainly haven't met that many "asexuals". I've met several homsexuals and bisexuals, but not any asexuals.

All in all, I struggle to work out what your beef is and why you felt Ron Jeremy (no idea who that is, by the way) was the best way to "p*** them off". Sounds like there's bigger issues here than just your fundamentalist/literalist upbringing.

~ Regards,

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I'm sorry for what happened and I'm glad you're getting back on track.

Jesus' teaching does seem more legalistic than loving. I mean equating the 'thought' of doing something (regardless of how fleeting) with the deed itself, well that's always struck me as both problematic and foolish. The two are not the same by any stretch of the imagination and jesus treating them as such doesn't strike me as 'loving'. Imagine our justice system. If everyonne that thought of doing something, even if they'd never actually do it, was but in jail, everyone would be in prison. (And we'd have no hesitation saying it was because the system got more legalistic, not moving loving.) To me it just seems like the only purpose it serves is to make doubly sure that everyone is guilty of something. it's sad really and you're most likely not the only one that's suffered because of it.

I don't believe Jesus was being so literal just illustrating that sin begins and takes root in our thoughts and hearts. Comparatively speaking, Jesus never committed sin in his heart or thoughts. His nature is not our nature as you yourself just testified to.

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The reason why chose this avatar and nickname was to rebel against the la-la land atmosphere of UM forums.

I joined UM because of the UFO subforum. But I got quickly disillusioned. Then I moved down to S&S. Too many self-proclaimed mystics, saints, prophets and whatnot. I felt sick of it and wanted to p*** them off. So I intentionally chose this persona. Having said that, I have noticed that there are many asexuals in here. Something inevitable? Maybe.

Haha yeah a lot of people will stay anonymous which isn't necessarily a bad thing. But still I don't think there's a lot of room for things of a sexual nature here.

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I don't believe Jesus was being so literal just illustrating that sin begins and takes root in our thoughts and hearts. Comparatively speaking, Jesus never committed sin in his heart or thoughts. His nature is not our nature as you yourself just testified to.

How do you know he never did anything that could be labelled a sin? The bible not only omits large sections of his life, but was composed largely long after his death. (Which means anything that could be labelled as a sin committed by him could simply be edited out.) I do recall that he got angry more than once and that's labelled as a sin but righteous anger allows him to wiggle out of it.

Second you don't know what he thought, you only know what he said and did which is not the same thing. (And even with that, much is what other people claimed he did and said.) You can no more know what he was thinking than you could know what I'm thinking right now. So agin, he could very easily have thought something that got labelled a sin but you'd have no idea.

Thoughts can lead us to negative actions, but (and here's the important part) thinking of doing a bad thing and doing it should never be considered as being the same thing. Most people have probably thought of killing or harming another person when they were angry, however when the anger subsides they're glad they didn't and the thought is discarded. But if you kill a person, well, that's different isn't it? It's so different it's obvious.

Edited by shadowhive
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How do you know he never did anything that could be labelled a sin? The bible not only omits large sections of his life, but was composed largely long after his death. (Which means anything that could be labelled as a sin committed by him could simply be edited out.) I do recall that he got angry more than once and that's labelled as a sin but righteous anger allows him to wiggle out of it.

Second you don't know what he thought, you only know what he said and did which is not the same thing. (And even with that, much is what other people claimed he did and said.) You can no more know what he was thinking than you could know what I'm thinking right now. So agin, he could very easily have thought something that got labelled a sin but you'd have no idea.

Thoughts can lead us to negative actions, but (and here's the important part) thinking of doing a bad thing and doing it should never be considered as being the same thing. Most people have probably thought of killing or harming another person when they were angry, however when the anger subsides they're glad they didn't and the thought is discarded. But if you kill a person, well, that's different isn't it? It's so different it's obvious.

His anger was addressed to those that turned his church into their own personal gains. They were banking off of God. Some things have never changed.

But I hold the scriptures as true that Jesus had pure thoughts only and descriptively asexual IMO.

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His anger was addressed to those that turned his church into their own personal gains. They were banking off of God. Some things have never changed.

But I hold the scriptures as true that Jesus had pure thoughts only and descriptively asexual IMO.

That's true, some things have never changed, but religion seems to have a built in function for abuse. Probably due to absurd nature and number of rules enshrined within it.

That's what it'd like you to think.

However real human beings aren't 'pure' all the time and have a built in sexual component. Denying that or expecting unrealistic expectations simply isn't benefitting anyone anywhere. I fail to see what the use is of expecting everyone to be 'pure' or asexual, other than setting them up to fail when they so much as think of something 'impure' or sexual.

I just don't see the value in treating humanity in such a negative way.

Edited by shadowhive

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This happens to a lot of people, fearfully following a god or religion and feeling like crap after a while. t Happened to me when I was a kid and there's several years of my teenage times I'll never get back, but it was partially my own fault for being an idiot kid and fearing punishment The only thing that ever peeves me about it is the fact that while people were out doing that stuff that teenagers do, I was locked away and scared ****less of god to the point where I can admit I became a bitter fellow.

All I can say is that you might as well build your life back in whatever way you can, it may take time (I only recently got out of that hellhole myself, with some nasty scars too) Rome wasn't built in a day right?

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