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Sakari

Why do people get so mad when questioned ?

158 posts in this topic

Posted (edited)

I have been having this happen a lot to me lately. More newer people, but the same thing.

First, I want to point out if someone is on a open discussion board as this one, do they not know what " open discussion " means?

Second, I have no issues with anyone believing whatever they want, it is when they say their belief is fact, and have no evidence to support this. This is exactly what some do with their religions, they preach it as fact, and we all know how religion and politic discussions end up.

Also, if someone does say " this is what I believe", but follow it with " what do you think " , why do they get so damn upset when people start questioning it?

I have some awesome PM's, and replies to me of people acting like I just spat on their mothers grave for debating with them, when they got into the debate.

Statements are taken as if they can hear my tone of typing, when they can not. ( others also, not just me )

Then, some will " follow " people to other topics and generalize on things they said in another topic, but will not talk about it in the proper topic. It is like they are in a battle to get people to believe them, and not someone else. It is actually comical.

Some will put people on ignore, then keep jabbing at them in replies on topics, and even ask them questions when they have them on ignore.....Then, wonder why they do not get answers.

I've seen it from all kinds; from Pagans to people of the Abrahamic religions to even little known ones, and those who have no belief system at all. Do they interpret any statements as a personal attack? Why is this the case so often? Anyone know?

Above goes for all topics here.

Funny thing, I , and all skeptics I am sure, would love nothing more then to see what people post be real. I WANT to believe some of the things here, I really do.

So, anyone care to share why you get so p***ed off when you get into a discussion on a open forum, about anything paranormal?

And, if you do get so mad, why do you stay on a open discussion board, and not go to a " believers " forum only?

There has to be a reason, and I would love to know what it is.

Now, do not get me wrong, there are great discussions here, it is a minority of people ( both sides ) that get in this " defensive" mode, then go into " attack " mode....

I just want to know why is all.

I have been forming my opinions, I just want to hear others.

I also wish we could get more mature debates/discussions going with people not getting butt hurt over a forum topic.

Edited by Sakari
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Providing there is nothing said to make the person feel stupid for saying what they did to begin with, there are people that just can't stand someone thinking differently than them.

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Providing there is nothing said to make the person feel stupid for saying what they did to begin with, there are people that just can't stand someone thinking differently than them.

I agree, but why?

There are also people that do not want to hear opinions or facts, unless they are the same as theirs.

Note : You are one that does not do this, and I respect that..... :tu:

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There's no '1 reason', ...there's as many reasons as people that post here at UM.

The other night I had an exasperating converstion with an atheist about agnosticism. For them, it was black or white, one side of the fence or nothing. It was like I was being asked for the 'proof of agnosticism'.

A month or so ago, someone was complaining that the conspiracy forum should belong only to the people that believe the conspiracy theories, so that they could have a place to freely discuss their evidence.

That's the thing, 'open discussion' is open to everyone that opens an account. Given that many people, there will be a lot that will get 'butt hurt' over the slightest imagined transgression.

:) Smiley faces help! :)... and if that doesn't work, screw'em!

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Providing there is nothing said to make the person feel stupid for saying what they did to begin with, there are people that just can't stand someone thinking differently than them.

What you have to remember is:

When in discussion with anyone, you have to remember that they believe that their "answers that are right to them" are equally as "right as your answers are to you"

If you are not willing to bow down to their opinions why should they to yours... You have to agree to disagree, until such a time one is of you is proven right.

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What you have to remember is:

When in discussion with anyone, you have to remember that they believe that their "answers that are right to them" are equally as "right as your answers are to you"

If you are not willing to bow down to their opinions why should they to yours... You have to agree to disagree, until such a time one is of you is proven right.

Then, there is no discussion.

As I said, why even bother then?

Neither needs to bow down to anyone.

And, as I said, again, " if they state it is jut a belief I do not mind "

When they state their belief as fact, that is where discussion should happen.

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Now, do not get me wrong, there are great discussions here, it is a minority of people ( both sides ) that get in this " defensive" mode, then go into " attack " mode....

I just want to know why is all.

I have been forming my opinions, I just want to hear others.

I also wish we could get more mature debates/discussions going with people not getting butt hurt over a forum topic.

The problems only occur when one side claims that their opinions are right, and all others are wrong. Then they continue to mock and condescend onto those with different beliefs. (Basically the same as Christianity does to Atheists. "if you do not believe in god you are ignorant and will burn in hellfire")

That is why people take offense, because they are being offended.

The whole problem will cease to exist as soon as people learn to respect each other's rights to different beliefs.

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The problems only occur when one side claims that their opinions are right, and all others are wrong. Then they continue to mock and condescend onto those with different beliefs. (Basically the same as Christianity does to Atheists. "if you do not believe in god you are ignorant and will burn in hellfire")

That is why people take offense, because they are being offended.

The whole problem will cease to exist as soon as people learn to respect each other's rights to different beliefs.

See, this is where this topic is.

You are correct, when people think their " opinions " are fact. That is what I said.

And you also pointed out they continue to mock and be condescending. I have been accused of this, when no quotes could be supported of me doing that. That is what I mean. Some people can not handle a discussion, even a " heated " one, without taking things personal, and trying to read in feelings and tone into replies. ( yes, some are out right obvious ).

I can show you a ton of examples of people getting offended, for no reason other then people asking them questions, or asking for evidence, or links and facts. It is just dumb.

These people are not being offended, they are taking offense because people do not believe them on their opinion, and try to discuss it.

As said, I have my hypothesis why.

And Felix, in case you missed it, respect for what you have done with your life, and Thank You for Serving the US, and everyones freedom. If you only new how much I have put into to donating for familes of fallen soldiers, and my Dad served 37 years. I have more respect for people that served then anyone......So, thank you.

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I've noticed throughout the years that Christians with the type A mindset often fall prey to arrogance.

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Ah Sakari, it's just cuz you a snarky cussed jackanape :) Just teasing you!

Really, people do get all flaked out when someone has a different opinion. They get extra flaked out when one is forthright and steadfast in their opinion.

One that I don't get is when you take the time to choose your words, and then someone decides to quote you and say "in other words.. ". Nope, no other words, if I had meant other words I would have chosen them instead of the ones I did. I see a lot of people that have differing opinions do this. Heck, I've seen people do this when I could swear they are actually on the same side of a subject and just putting it in two different ways.

I don't know why some folks get so mad about it. I've for sure had my pride pinked on UM, but usually I'm more pleased to have better information or truer knowledge than I am upset that I was wrong or that someone isn't agreeing with me. I'm also willing enough to shrug it off, agree to disagree, and just leave the thread or move on with it.

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this is why I tend to stay away from supernatural forums sak, too rabid for me.

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I've noticed throughout the years that Christians with the type A mindset often fall prey to arrogance.

.

what's a 'type A mindset' J.K?

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Ah Sakari, it's just cuz you a snarky cussed jackanape :) Just teasing you!

Really, people do get all flaked out when someone has a different opinion. They get extra flaked out when one is forthright and steadfast in their opinion.

One that I don't get is when you take the time to choose your words, and then someone decides to quote you and say "in other words.. ". Nope, no other words, if I had meant other words I would have chosen them instead of the ones I did. I see a lot of people that have differing opinions do this. Heck, I've seen people do this when I could swear they are actually on the same side of a subject and just putting it in two different ways.

I don't know why some folks get so mad about it. I've for sure had my pride pinked on UM, but usually I'm more pleased to have better information or truer knowledge than I am upset that I was wrong or that someone isn't agreeing with me. I'm also willing enough to shrug it off, agree to disagree, and just leave the thread or move on with it.

Look above my avatar :)

You are right.

I have people take something from me, say " Demons do not exist " and exagerate that to " the paranormal does not exist "........

Pretty broad jump there :)

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Look above my avatar :)

You are right.

I have people take something from me, say " Demons do not exist " and exagerate that to " the paranormal does not exist "........

Pretty broad jump there :)

OMG Sakari that's funny as hell!

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...Then they continue to mock and condescend onto those with different beliefs. (Basically the same as Christianity does to Atheists. "if you do not believe in god you are ignorant and will burn in hellfire")

Or when atheists infer that theists are ignorant inbred hill-billies?

I don't believe either side, I just believe that we live on a two/three way street and all are allowed equal access.

One of the first rules of a healthy debate is, don't bring your personality. :) Who 'you' are doesn't mean diddleysquat. What 'you' think does.

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I think we're starting to lose the art of civil discourse in our society. Look at someone like Rush Limbaugh, who still is extremely popular with some folks. He and some others have taught us that it's OK and even desirable to use pejoratives for those who disagree with us, to cut people off in mid-sentence who aren't true believers. I saw it during the last 2 election cycles, and in my own family. Those of us who are Democrats & liberals were called all kinds of names, denigrated, mocked, and subjected to rants that were full of inaccuracies. And the people who felt perfectly free to post or say whatever they wanted got really p***ed when they got a response they didn't like. Part of it is just plain bad manners, some of it is due to adopting a poor role model, ignorance plays a role, as does confirmation bias and immaturity.

We used to be able to agree to disagree, now we just call each other names and identify ourselves and others by our differences instead of our commonality. The US has become extremely polarized, and that them vs us attitude hurts everyone in the long run. But, people do like to be right, and some people will insist on being right no matter what price they have to pay. In the long run, they end up hurting themselves.

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I don't know, I am used to having my belief system attacked. Hell they come up on the porch to do it. I guess they don't see pentacle next to the door and the instruction to think about why they are there. On a website like this I could care less and I don't take it personal, I am here to discuss and debate. If I didn't enjoy it I wouldn't be here, I really don't do anything if I don't enjoy it. I am too old and mess up to worry about what somebody on a website says. There are some people on this site I have a great deal of respect for. Some I have none, respect you have to earn. There are people here I have know for years. There are many who are gone I really miss. I met some first class science and history buffs. If you start talking BS there is somebody who is going to call you out on it and if you can't back up your science or history here your not going to win the debate. If you can't handle it you need to move on, because especially this forum you're not going to get a break.

Saru split the religion and skepticism the into two. That way if you want something light you can on the religion part and i you want something more adversarial you can come to this one. One good thing about being a Pagan is we really don't care what religion people are as long as you play nice and nobody gets physically hurt. We believe when you're ready, you will understand.

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Everyone knows there are nuts on here, after awhile , they are easy to identify.

They are the one's with the longest replies in

a topic they do not believe in. They are the ones that make personal attacks on someones character and intelligence because they choose too keep their feet firmly in the acceptable realms of there own perceptions, and never would accept anything from outside these boundaries.

And that UMers , is what makes this site fantastic,

especially for us fence sitters.It makes for good comedic relief in a disturbingly deteriorating world.

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Posted (edited)

**1) You are correct, when people think their " opinions " are fact. That is what I said.

And you also pointed out they **2)continue to mock and be condescending. **3)I have been accused of this, when no quotes could be supported of me doing that. That is what I mean. Some people can not handle a discussion, even a " heated " one, without taking things personal, and trying to read in feelings and tone into replies. ( yes, some are out right obvious ).

I can show you a **4)ton of examples of people getting offended, for no reason other then people asking them questions, or asking for evidence, or links and facts. It is just dumb.

These people are **5)not being offended, they are taking offense because people do not believe them on their opinion, and try to discuss it.

I have people take something from me, say " **6)Demons do not exist " and exagerate that to " **7)the paranormal does not exist "........

Pretty broad jump there :)

I have taken the freedom of bolding some quotes of your last two posts, but we both know you are smart enough to understand what you are doing. We both also know that you are doing this intentionally, and that it is not the first time.

1) Didn't you claim that demons do not exist and you have facts to prove such?

2) I will touch more of this a bit later.

3) Same as above.

4) While it is true that people may get offended seemingly for no reason, it is quite uncommon. For every example you can demonstrate of this occurring I will demonstrate 3 of them actually being disrespected.

5) The same as 4 applies, most people do not get offended by disbelief but by disrespect towards their beliefs.

6) Same as number one.

7) See numbers two and three? Where you said people accuse you of being condescending or mocking them and no quotes of such can be demonstrated? Here is your demonstration, this is not your first sneaky wordplay shot at me either.

Note: Nobody said it was just you, it is many people who have adapted this whole mentality of "Someone posted their experience, it's time to go mock them".

Edited by xFelix
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I think we're starting to lose the art of civil discourse in our society. Look at someone like Rush Limbaugh, who still is extremely popular with some folks. He and some others have taught us that it's OK and even desirable to use pejoratives for those who disagree with us, to cut people off in mid-sentence who aren't true believers. I saw it during the last 2 election cycles, and in my own family. Those of us who are Democrats & liberals were called all kinds of names, denigrated, mocked, and subjected to rants that were full of inaccuracies. And the people who felt perfectly free to post or say whatever they wanted got really p***ed when they got a response they didn't like. Part of it is just plain bad manners, some of it is due to adopting a poor role model, ignorance plays a role, as does confirmation bias and immaturity.

We used to be able to agree to disagree, now we just call each other names and identify ourselves and others by our differences instead of our commonality. The US has become extremely polarized, and that them vs us attitude hurts everyone in the long run. But, people do like to be right, and some people will insist on being right no matter what price they have to pay. In the long run, they end up hurting themselves.

Hey, Beany,

The first part, I agree with everything you said. The second part was steeped too much in US politics. The third part you said, I agree with again.

I owe you 2/3rd's of a 'like'. :)

- Likely Guy

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I owe you 2/3rd's of a 'like'.

.

a 'lik'?

(i know that technically that's 3/4 of a like, but I can't split the 'k'. or maybe I could do a bit of inventive cheating and make it 'lic'....?)

:-)

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Ok, not directing this at anyone...

But hey, second page in, things are sure to shred soon... So just chill... Don't get mad folks. Don't provoke, don't get all arg...

Let's just nicely chat about why people get mad instead :)

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I want to complain about these people, too. In some of my discussions, my adversary, I mean who I'm discussing or debating with will choose to reply to my easiest point to contend with. Parts of my replies that they might have difficulty challenging they ignore. And some are so smug. They dismiss my posts as though my point of view is so obviously incorrect as to be inconsequential.

Note: Nobody said it was just you, it is many people who have adapted this whole mentality of "Someone posted their experience, it's time to go mock them".

I can understand someone getting offended when a poster tries to make that person look foolish, so I think it cuts both ways. A type A person takes offense when his/her opinion is challenged, a type B person takes offense when he/she feels mocked, so he/she retaliates.

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.

a 'lik'?

(i know that technically that's 3/4 of a like, but I can't split the 'k'. or maybe I could do a bit of inventive cheating and make it 'lic'....?)

:-)

The Welsh have an answer but it's 27 letters long. :)

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Posted (edited)

welsh is an odd language! because it's ancient, they don't have words for modern things, so you'll hear odd words like 'video' or 'telephone' mixed in with it, but, the welsh word for 'microwave' has got to be the

b-e-s-t

word

EVER!!

.

(it's a 'popty-ping!')

Edited by shrooma
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