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Still Waters

Cuddle hormone 'increases' agony

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It is known as the cuddle hormone, but it seems the chemical that helps us fall in love may also be responsible for prolonging our agony when relationships go wrong.

Scientists have found that oxytocin, which promotes feelings of love and social bonding, also plays a role in etching painful emotional memories into the brain.

http://www.telegraph...oken-heart.html

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makes sense, love can be a wonderful feeling but on the other hand it can rip out your beating heart infront of your eyes, there always has to be an opposite love/hate light/darkness and they always seem to go hand in hand so well i love the choas factor to life

what goes up must come down

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It doesn't matter if it is "love" or "hate". It is still an addiction, a drug (chemical / hormone). People seem to forget that.

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oh no i very well know that its an addiction, thats why so many people are stuck in their vicous cycles

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Posted (edited)

I' learned that feeling VERY quickly with my girlfriend back in high school, it's to the point now where I would just rather be alone then go through that type of pain again.

Iv seen that happen to my uncle more times than I can count, and it's very evident to me that he fears to be alone, so he hurries up and tries to find a replacement.

Edited by R4z3rsPar4d0x
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I' learned that feeling VERY quickly with my girlfriend back in high school, it's to the point now where I would just rather be alone then go through that type of pain again.

oh ive been there brother, but thats why you have to pick up, mend the pieces and put it back on the choping block, there would not be 7 billion people on this planet if we were all ment to be with just one person our whole lives, it sucks yes, but its a learning experience, either you learn what not to do in your next relationship, or you learn what to not go for qualities in girls, life is one great big painful learning experience, than you die, me my light are my children, even though they might hate me as they grow up ill know that i love 4 things in this world with the upmost intesity and that recieving end of that love can never break up with me

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Yikes! With my track record I really must be stuffed full of it. :tu::wub: :wub: :wub: :wub: :wub:

Oxytocin, I mean. :rolleyes::P

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lol

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I' learned that feeling VERY quickly with my girlfriend back in high school, it's to the point now where I would just rather be alone then go through that type of pain again.

Iv seen that happen to my uncle more times than I can count, and it's very evident to me that he fears to be alone, so he hurries up and tries to find a replacement.

The more you have it, the more it hurts. I'm a masochist, though, even there. But I dont like the idea of addiction, being addicted to someone. Nor someone being addicted to me. Just loving is better. Explains why people eat chokolate and all that stuff after breakup.

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love is deaths b**** lover! ADRIAN! ADRIAN!

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The more you have it, the more it hurts. I'm a masochist, though, even there. But I dont like the idea of addiction, being addicted to someone. Nor someone being addicted to me. Just loving is better. Explains why people eat chokolate and all that stuff after breakup.

Chocolate increase dopamine levels, thats why its refered to as such.

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So it may not have been better to have loved then lost after all.

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Yes I hate this cuddle hormoone...

or what ever it's called...

it's why I don't fall in love or bond with anyone..

Also falling in love is a waste of time..

I believe love to be the biggest lie ever told...

something from the Devil's mouth..

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Posted (edited)

Iv seen that happen to my uncle more times than I can count, and it's very evident to me that he fears to be alone, so he hurries up and tries to find a replacement.

Not always a bad thing, with every failed attempt, you learn more about yourself and more about what you're looking for as well. That makes you less likely to "settle" on things in the next potential mate. Eventually you will either find someone perfect, or very close to being perfect for you, or you will move on and learn to love a single, unattached life, which also has it's benefits. Oxytocin blockers in the short term would be helpful though, breakups really suck for a few months. After you've been through it a few times, you become a lot more guarded, and it hurts a lot less to split with someone. Still though, the initial split is really difficult.

Edited by WoIverine

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It's never wise to give another soul...

power over you happiness or your heart.....

If you never give them that power.. they can never break you heart...

also who is truly worth of you loving them so deeply?

I think it's all tricks of the mind... all in the mind.. none of it is real....

just chemicals... and thoughts flowing...

what they once thought was magic is simply science..

but it can be controled and manipulated to your will....

love does not conquer all...

it only conquers the weak minded...

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lol this thread is epic

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Posted (edited)

oh ive been there brother, but thats why you have to pick up, mend the pieces and put it back on the choping block, there would not be 7 billion people on this planet if we were all ment to be with just one person our whole lives, it sucks yes, but its a learning experience, either you learn what not to do in your next relationship, or you learn what to not go for qualities in girls, life is one great big painful learning experience, than you die, me my light are my children, even though they might hate me as they grow up ill know that i love 4 things in this world with the upmost intesity and that recieving end of that love can never break up with me

Yeah and Its not like iv only been with one person, but If your lucky you do find your "soul Mate" and stay together, It seems like in this world the idea of being with one person is a bad thing, I mean personally I would want one woman I can connect with on several different levels than having to change women every two minutes. But hey that's just me, this one I recently broke up with I had a really strong connection with, I mean we liked all the same things, It was great. But when the dust settled and I realized it was over and she was gone, its like a part of me left with her, my heart, I know it sounds corny as hell but yeah that's the way it is.

Not always a bad thing, with every failed attempt, you learn more about yourself and more about what you're looking for as well. That makes you less likely to "settle" on things in the next potential mate. Eventually you will either find someone perfect, or very close to being perfect for you, or you will move on and learn to love a single, unattached life, which also has it's benefits. Oxytocin blockers in the short term would be helpful though, breakups really suck for a few months. After you've been through it a few times, you become a lot more guarded, and it hurts a lot less to split with someone. Still though, the initial split is really difficult.

The key word there is learning and trying not to repeat the same mistakes repeatedly. The split is more than difficult when your with someone that you put all your faith, energy, time, money into and it all just ends up blowing up in your face. In my opinion the pain felt is worse than even the highest high that person brings you when your together. But again this is just my opinion. Its easier to be alone at least for me than putting myself through that again, Now I'm not saying forever but at least for me there has to be a cooling off period, Kinda like serial killers have between murders :yes:

The more you have it, the more it hurts. I'm a masochist, though, even there. But I dont like the idea of addiction, being addicted to someone. Nor someone being addicted to me. Just loving is better. Explains why people eat chokolate and all that stuff after breakup.

You wanna talk about pain, that's my department :tu:

Edited by R4z3rsPar4d0x
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It's never wise to give another soul...

power over you happiness or your heart.....

If you never give them that power.. they can never break you heart...

also who is truly worth of you loving them so deeply?

I think it's all tricks of the mind... all in the mind.. none of it is real....

just chemicals... and thoughts flowing...

what they once thought was magic is simply science..

but it can be controled and manipulated to your will....

love does not conquer all...

it only conquers the weak minded...

Sometimes I have those thoughts to

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we need love in order to function in our world, even though it causes pain, atleast that pain reminds us that we are human, always remember the hurt only lasts a couple weeks some even just takes days,

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Posted (edited)

The key word there is learning and trying not to repeat the same mistakes repeatedly. The split is more than difficult when your with someone that you put all your faith, energy, time, money into and it all just ends up blowing up in your face. In my opinion the pain felt is worse than even the highest high that person brings you when your together. But again this is just my opinion. Its easier to be alone at least for me than putting myself through that again, Now I'm not saying forever but at least for me there has to be a cooling off period, Kinda like serial killers have between murders :yes:

Yeah man, I learned the hard way too. I poured my everything into a relationship I had a few years ago, and got completely screwed. I realized that when you give your all, it's never usually appreciated, and many times, it turns a girl off to you (sometimes unconsciously they see "too nice" as a weakness). If you find yourself being too nice, back off and throw up some distance for a little bit, focus on yourself, even if you don't want to. She will wonder what's going on and will jump through hoops to get you back to where she feels comfortable. ;)

A book called, "The Passion Paradox: Patterns of Love and Power in Intimate Relationships" is pretty good, it teaches about relationship balance, ebbs and flows, etc.

Edited by WoIverine

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Yeah man, I learned the hard way too. I poured my everything into a relationship I had a few years ago, and got completely screwed. I realized that when you give your all, it's never usually appreciated, and many times, it turns a girl off to you (sometimes unconsciously they see "too nice" as a weakness). If you find yourself being too nice, back off and throw up some distance for a little bit, focus on yourself, even if you don't want to. She will wonder what's going on and will jump through hoops to get you back to where she feels comfortable. ;)

A book called, "The Passion Paradox: Patterns of Love and Power in Intimate Relationships" is pretty good, it teaches about relationship balance, ebbs and flows, etc.

That's going into the whole psychology of the females mind, and although they may all be different, the girl I lost was utterly I don't want to say insane, but she wasn't like everyone else. Which is what drew me to her in the first place, because to tell you the truth I got screws loose in my head to, but the way we got along was like beautiful music, and I wasn't way to nice which is why I think we lasted so long because we were completely honest with each other.

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