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Apoapsis

I radiate negative energy. How do I change?

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Hi!

This is my first post here.

I radiate negative energy, I don't feel anything myself but when I leave my apartment people will frequently cough in my direction or cover their face with their hand when they see me. I also notice how people scratch their face when they are talking to me. I'm pretty sure I'm not imagining things. Some have mentioned that I have a really bad vibe.

This started after several bad things happened to me almost at the same time. Hurt by someone etc. Also my entire life I have been expected to be the adult one. I have a hard time to be recognizes as a human with feelings.

Since I know this will happen I try to mentally push people away and they seem to sense that. But I don't know how to stop. The worst part is that everyone seems to be convinced that I do this intentionally. If I could change this I would. I'm just a guy who has had a ruff time i life lately.

Anyone have any advice?

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Being in a good mood makes you smile, but smiling also gets you in a good mood. Try to act the way you want to feel and not the way you really do and you may find your feelings changing to match your actions. Sorry about all the hurt.

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It all begins from recognicing things in yourself. If you're hurt, then be hurt. If you feel like yelling out, walk out all the way near the edge of a forest, take a breather, and make peoples' hairs stand up in their necks with your cry. When you recognice and face something in yourself, others have an easier time facing it too. It doesn't have to be easy, life's not always easy. It doesn't have to be anything anyone tells you. And look yourself in the mirror a bit, can help to recognice yourself and to build a bit of self-esteem. When you deal with life, you ain't the cinderella in an ivory tower, but a poor Rocky Balboa in his 1st movie's beginning, fighting crappy matches and getting yourself hurt for seemingly little gain. But you do it because you like it, because you feel good about being yourself. We all do.

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Just be kind to others. It will go away if you show kindness.

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You radiate how you are on the inside. The mentality pushing people away radiates out.

Psychologically speaking when people have pain they normally have something they need to let go. be it a memory or the want for revenge or hatred or the sense of injustice delt upon you.

You have to let go. Let go of the fear of being hurt. You have to let go of that and let people in. You have to not want to mentally push people away.

You just have to let it all go! :tsu:

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You have to let go .. forgive and try to feel good about yourself and who you are. Don't try to change for other people. Do it for yourself and then eventually others will recognize it and it's going to feel so different for both you and them. You just have to work it out within yourself.

Good luck :)

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The fact you are aware of radiating negative energy is a great start…. Most people go through their lives not even realising just how much their life experiences are down to them and what they give out.

So, well done for your self awareness, indeed well done.

You have demonstrated an openness beyond most by the fact that when others have said those things to you, you have not recoiled but have taken it on board and questioned the validity to such statements as…. 'a really bad vibe'. Whilst most would ignore or dismiss this without even thinking twice.

So,

Yet again,

I complement you on your openness to hold the mirror of truth up to yourself.

It shows courage and a strength of character. Well done.

Ok, having said this and given that not every cough or scratch are actually to do with you and may well be down to the other persons own self consciousness, insecurities or just as plain and simple as having an itch and no more.

Be aware….There are however some people out there that are clumsy and would rather project their own personality traits on to others than deal with it in themselves…. Saying such things to an innocent as….. 'you have a really bad vibe'. Can be just a sad manipulation technique of smoke and mirrors.

But even so,

It is clear by the fact of you asking the above question that you are still up for exploring this as a possibility.

i have found it useful to gauge things by ratios, such as, if I am the common denominator then may be it is about me….But still, understand this is not always the case.

As in the story of the out of tune choir…

Where all but for one are singing out of tune.

The whole choir turns to the single one in tune, glaring, whispering, snarling as they all look at the one in tune and accusingly declare the one to be off key. When in truth, they are actually all out of tune and the one is the only one out of the whole choir singing in tune.

If you see what i am trying to tell you…. Just because someone says something, doesn't make it true. Even if they have a gang, government, socially excepted norm or whatever behind them with their nodding dog heads wagging in agreement. It is always best to make enquiry for ones self, think things through, make observations, study it for yourself.

Sorry for such a lengthy response but i feel your question warrants a full answer.

Now to make a starter into the addressing the 'how to change'.

You could start by writing it out.

Two columns, one listing negative attitudes, beliefs, thinkings, assumptions, reactions. and another column of positive attitudes, beliefs, thinkings, reasonings and responses.

What will be revealed to you by doing such a list is how you are thinking at present.

It will also reveal to you that if you know the negative, you will know the opposite and therefore the positive attitude stance to take.

It has been demonstrated through many tests that when we make a mistake/ get something wrong….. The positive thinking person is quicker and better able to change and correct, improve and overlay the mistake. Where as, the negatively thinking person will be slower and find it harder to make the necessary changes to improve.

So,

Yet again, may i acknowledge the fact of your wanting to change as evidence that may be your negativity is not your own in built or a natural state of how or who you actually are but something you have learnt and adopted through the negative reinforcements within your experiences to date. Be it from peers, family, teachers or whatever.

Knowing that this is not a natural state will help in letting the baggage of your yesterdays go. As some have mentioned already.

Questioning your beliefs, all those things you have excepted as true without question.

This is a process of realignment.

Instead of facing the negative and looking through the glass darkly you will now be turning it all around and facing the light. This is best done on ones own at first, because unfortunately, others may struggle to except the new you. Only when you are strong enough in your self will you venture out but you will know when you are ready to do so. Above all be kind and gentle with yourself. You may find you lose a lot of so called friends as you make these changes but this is all part of the process.The ones you lose where not good friends but you will see this too as you go.

Making enquiry has helped me too. You can try looking into 'The work' by Bryan katie… There will be plenty on youtube and such, it is free.

Self affirmations/ call overs also can help.

I have made a start on some of the options now open to you but there is much more besides too but this will get you started.

This is a beginning, the doors to freedom will open to you now, life will change. There are many positive steps along the way and much delight to be lived.

May be once you have been able to digest this, i will write more.

But its a starter, for now.

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Hi Guys!

Thanks for the support.

I decided that I was not going to let the s**t that has happened to me affact me and expelled it.

A breathing technic were you expell negativity when you exhale was used. Kinda of like when a bull snorts.

It seems to be working.

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Hi!

This is my first post here.

I radiate negative energy, I don't feel anything myself but when I leave my apartment people will frequently cough in my direction or cover their face with their hand when they see me. I also notice how people scratch their face when they are talking to me. I'm pretty sure I'm not imagining things. Some have mentioned that I have a really bad vibe.

This started after several bad things happened to me almost at the same time. Hurt by someone etc. Also my entire life I have been expected to be the adult one. I have a hard time to be recognizes as a human with feelings.

Since I know this will happen I try to mentally push people away and they seem to sense that. But I don't know how to stop. The worst part is that everyone seems to be convinced that I do this intentionally. If I could change this I would. I'm just a guy who has had a ruff time i life lately.

Anyone have any advice?

Work on yourself. Watch a movie called "the secret".

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Hi Guys!

Thanks for the support.

I decided that I was not going to let the s**t that has happened to me affact me and expelled it.

A breathing technic were you expell negativity when you exhale was used. Kinda of like when a bull snorts.

It seems to be working.

That's grand, Apoapsis. Well done. What ever works works..good, good. :tu:

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Hi Guys!

Thanks for the support.

I decided that I was not going to let the s**t that has happened to me affact me and expelled it.

A breathing technic were you expell negativity when you exhale was used. Kinda of like when a bull snorts.

It seems to be working.

It is brilliant that you are taking control of your own 'vibe', rather than letting others control that for you.

This is something I posted elsewhere, but I feel is relevant here...

Each of us is a unique being, and immensely wonderful in our complexity and capacity for nobility or depravity.

One of my favourite movie scenes occurs near the end of "Watchmen", when Dr Manhatten realises how special Silk Spectre is, just by the sheer unlikelihood of all the events that had to transpire for her to be there, then, as she was. This epiphany had nothing to do with us being "special creations of God", but on how magnificant is the universe in which such a thing [as Silk Spectre] can be.

The universe is magnificent - and we are part of this universe, not separate from it. Does that not make us magnificent also?

Dr Manhatten learned to not separate the component (us) from the whole (the universe).

Learn to appreciate yourself for the wonderful being that you are - and that applies to everyone. Consider that all of us are equally, and uniquely, wonderful.

It doesn't matter whether what has happened to us to bring us to where we are now, has been good or bad, all that matters is who we are, right now. That we can appreciate, even love, the slightest thing about ourselves - that is what is important. And it helps us also appreciate and love others.

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I don't know if this is helpful or not, but I find that if you listen to postive affirmations (and maybe even repeat one that you like that is meaningful for you in particular) people respond more positivly to you. You can root out any negative beliefs that you might have regarding your interactions with others and your self concept and replace those negative beliefs with more constructive ones.

This worked for me because I used to be too shy to talk to people, and now people think I'm cute and charming :)

All you have to do is change your mind.

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Hi!

This is my first post here.

I radiate negative energy, I don't feel anything myself but when I leave my apartment people will frequently cough in my direction or cover their face with their hand when they see me. I also notice how people scratch their face when they are talking to me. I'm pretty sure I'm not imagining things. Some have mentioned that I have a really bad vibe.

This started after several bad things happened to me almost at the same time. Hurt by someone etc. Also my entire life I have been expected to be the adult one. I have a hard time to be recognizes as a human with feelings.

Since I know this will happen I try to mentally push people away and they seem to sense that. But I don't know how to stop. The worst part is that everyone seems to be convinced that I do this intentionally. If I could change this I would. I'm just a guy who has had a ruff time i life lately.

Anyone have any advice?

Get yourself a girlfriend.

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Don't worry. Be happy!

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Each radiates energy according to their mental mood. So, anyone can change the radiation through meditation techniques.

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To elaborate on the above it is best (imho) to meditate on a happy memory. Do this till you feel the happiness. Gradually this should help your mentality.

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Posted (edited)

Hi!

This is my first post here.

I radiate negative energy, I don't feel anything myself but when I leave my apartment people will frequently cough in my direction or cover their face with their hand when they see me. I also notice how people scratch their face when they are talking to me. I'm pretty sure I'm not imagining things. Some have mentioned that I have a really bad vibe.

This started after several bad things happened to me almost at the same time. Hurt by someone etc. Also my entire life I have been expected to be the adult one. I have a hard time to be recognizes as a human with feelings.

Since I know this will happen I try to mentally push people away and they seem to sense that. But I don't know how to stop. The worst part is that everyone seems to be convinced that I do this intentionally. If I could change this I would. I'm just a guy who has had a ruff time i life lately.

Anyone have any advice?

It seems that you are aware of this because of the nuances or odd comments which others have directed to you, realize that is generally public ignorance and people can sometimes say things like this because they are jerks. Unless you are aware of having a harmful intention toward others, then that's just smoke; and certainly you do not have this negative aura about you. Others are just trying to niggle you into thinking something is wrong here, but it is them. You really shouldn't judge yourself by the odd commentaries that others make because that is not in any wise a mirror of your own true self; and maybe they are niggling because deep down you have a little vainity of your own and this shows. And it is not a good idea to talk about an inner hurt, heal that and move on with your life. Just the healing process and the ability to move on and enjoy your life anyway is a major life changing experience in itself; good luck to you with that.

Edited by spacelizard667

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Just be kind to others. It will go away if you show kindness.

Good one.

........only if it actually worked.

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Hi Guys!

Thanks for the support.

I decided that I was not going to let the s**t that has happened to me affact me and expelled it.

A breathing technic were you expell negativity when you exhale was used. Kinda of like when a bull snorts.

It seems to be working.

If you still are experiencing this some.. also do a meditation in which you imagine the energy links between you and the one who hurt you being cut as you let go of any remaining negative energy.

I like to also do imprinting.. go into a meditation state and go back to when you were being hurt and send yourself love to that self you were then.. comfort your past self. Do this till you can go back and find the past has no hold over you at all. (doing deep breathing in which your abdomen is gently raising and falling.. breathing in thru the nose and out throu the mouth while doing this.. also helps release any left over negative energy).

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Again, people often make a lot of odd commentaries....try releasing the past with indifference.

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