Promiscuous People: Distant and Disconnected?

[psyche101]

If you have all the money you could want, you still need friends, and exhibitionism is a good way to lose them and generate envy and attract trouble. I have no trouble putting out the cash to fly first class, cause it's neat, but I show up in jeans and pullover shirt and my old canvass travel bag. Of course the people on the plane know full well what I'm doing and I think respect me for it.

Really? That honestly seem very strange to me, to act poor, when you have strived to become someone, to not have what you earned seems like self punishment to me.

I value the opposite. People think it is cool to look like a bum, and lie on the beach, and be a hippy, but I do not respect that nature garbage at all, I call it laziness. To me, it takes a great deal of effort to get up early, make sure you are properly showered, shaved, wearing a watch (big one with me - means a person values time and is punctual) neat clean hair decently cut.

Anyone can lie on the beach an be a bum, that takes no effort at all. To be on time, well presented, and in good form takes much more effort, and that's what I see in a flashy person, effort and hard work. I would find the idea of hiding wealth devious and dishonest, and I would not trust a person that does that. I know people covet wealth, if a businessman is successful and has a flashy car, hot wife, and a boat at the marina, people talk about him behind his back, but all the same - every single one of them wants to be him.

I would probably respect you too, for going to such great efforts to make this around you comfortable, but I would consider such actions as quirky.

I have to go now, things to do, thanks you for the cultural exchange Frank, I am in your debt, I look forward to reading more tomorrow.

[Frank Merton]

Yes, that is what I mean, snake oil salesmen aka dishonest business men, biker gang runs many businesses, most of them rather illegal, but many legitimate ones too, but a clean cut older guy with driving a Ferrari with a Rolex watch with an attractive young wife cannot be trusted because his success has brought him happiness in his bedroom as well as at work?

Refusing the above when one has worked hard enough to afford such is just self punishment isn't it?

I know one very successful man who owns several Ferrari's, cause he likes driving them. His wife is really the businessperson of that particular family though. I've dealt with them over the years a few times and they have made major purchases from my company (not my company personally but the firm I have worked for now almost thirty years), and I had no hesitation extending liberal credit terms. Once you trust someone that is pretty much all it takes; books can be cooked but personalities and performance count.

[Frank Merton]

Well I'm clean and shaved and have a good haircut and manicure if that is what you mean. I just don't dress in ten thousand dollar suits and wear any jewelry, and when traveling I dress comfortably.

[psyche101]

I guess I have a different view of what money is for: I have experienced serious deprivation where I thought me and everyone around me was going to starve to death. I remember long periods when all there was to eat was some cassava the government managed to drop off, mixed with things we caught. So to me money represents safety, as does political stability. It also includes the idea that your children and their children will never have to face such things. I don't need a fancy watch (who wears watches anyway nowadays?)

Ohh dragged me in for one more.....

My background is very poor too, not as much as yours from what I read, but we did live on rice and water, when my mother and father divorced, my mother moved quite some distance away, and we live din lifeline houses for about 2 years, then living with only a single Mum, I sure knew what poor meant, I assure you. When she remarried, she did so for what I think were the wrong reasons, and my stepfather was a farmer, again, years of hardship, no comforts just work. But an honest living.

All it did was make me strive, from a little kid all I wanted to do was be self sufficient and never rely on anyone.

A watch to a worker to me is a valuable tool. It means I can rely in him to be where I need him to be. Iphones and that are not so great for time telling on a construction site, they are usually in a pocket or some such so they do not fall and get broken, a watch is efficient.

[spartan max2]

What STDs do you get kissing? Mono? Colds?

Here is a list http://voxxi.com/201.../oral-sex-stds/ for "oral"

Edited December 4, 2013 by spartan max2

[Skep B]

What do you base relationships upon?

Why do both partners have to be attractive?

Intimacy is not a relationship.

Why can't money be a common denominator that makes both partners happy? Why does it have to be something else?

In the case of the trophy wife concept I was meaning the female was attractive and thats all she brought to the relationship

How do you figure intimacy isn't a relationship? I don't understand that

[Drayno]

An abuser is going to appear strong in the eyes of someone who considers themselves a victim still.

If she never allowed herself to heal from the experience and to move on, then a part of her would always be under the abuser's control.

That's an unfortunate point that is also 100% correct.

[Neognosis]

On a biological level:

Women seek a partner who can provide for them and their children and who has strong genetic traits that he can pass on. Women seek a partner who can pass to their children power and security.

On a biological level:

Men want several women in succession and sometimes concurrently who are best able to successfully birth a child. Men want women with physical features that indicate she will be able to feed and care for a child. Men want women who have outward signs of health and youth, as health and youth give the best chance of surviving pregnancy and childbirth and having a healthy child.

When a woman becomes too old to likely have healthy children and raise them, men naturally find them less attractive.

On a biological level, women look for power and a provider. Currency, power, muscles.

Men look for youth and beauty. Curves, largish breasts, clear skin and eyes, long hair.

Edited December 5, 2013 by Neognosis

[Frank Merton]

I just love American "corn on the cob" although to American eyes I ruin it with a little olive oil with the salt and pepper. That doesn't mean, however, that I am loyal to it and want to eat nothing else.

[spacecowboy342]

I just love American "corn on the cob" although to American eyes I ruin it with a little olive oil with the salt and pepper. That doesn't mean, however, that I am loyal to it and want to eat nothing else.

That's fine as long as you haven't promised to be loyal to it and eat nothing else

[psyche101]

I know one very successful man who owns several Ferrari's, cause he likes driving them. His wife is really the businessperson of that particular family though. I've dealt with them over the years a few times and they have made major purchases from my company (not my company personally but the firm I have worked for now almost thirty years), and I had no hesitation extending liberal credit terms. Once you trust someone that is pretty much all it takes; books can be cooked but personalities and performance count.

Many of our Prime Ministers have been elected with a very showy lifestyle. Paul Keating was known for his Ferraris, Swiss Clock Collection, and German Suits. The last Prime Minister Kevin Rudd was also married to a very wealthy lady, and was a spoiled brat who would throw tantrums at Aircraft Staff for not having a decent hot meal for him, or losing it at someone for forgetting to pack his hairdryer.

I did not vote for either of them, but the country did an elected them. As such, I would say in a Western situation, certainly here in Australia, that flashing wealth is not cosidered offensive at all. We make those people Prime Ministers.

[psyche101]

In the case of the trophy wife concept I was meaning the female was attractive and thats all she brought to the relationship

I honestly do not think that is ever the case. I feel in every case, there is something for both parties.

How do you figure intimacy isn't a relationship? I don't understand that

I find it part of a relationship, not what a relationship is based upon. Lets say my wife, God forbid, was in a serious car accident tomorrow and could never have sex, or be intimate again, like being married to Stephen Hawking or something. Lets say she is physically incapable of intimate contact and can only communicate basically on a keypad. Like being married to a machine. It would not change the way I feel about her.

[psyche101]

Well I'm clean and shaved and have a good haircut and manicure if that is what you mean. I just don't dress in ten thousand dollar suits and wear any jewelry, and when traveling I dress comfortably.

Well it does not have to be a ten thousand dollar suit, but if someone shows up shabbily presented, it indicates they do not bother to go to any effort - not even for themselves. That is not the sort of person I want working for me, I need people who do not use too hard baskets. I need people who are ambitious, and want to make things happen.

To me, that is just expected from an employee. But like I say, I am a little highly strung compared to most, like I drink a great deal of red cordial. This is my preferred news show. Not sure if it says anything about me.

[Frank Merton]

The point is to dress appropriately. I would never show up for a business appointment in New York without wearing a suit, and a cheap off the rack suit would not be acceptable. Since it costs maybe two hundred dollars to have a tailor made suit of high quality material made here in HCMC, few are bought off the rack as is the norm in the States.

The point I am really making is that even though I can afford a car, I don't have one but go places by motorbike. It's easier to drive around in. Same I don't have a big house, but I do have one comfortable and in a quiet neighborhood. (Neighborhoods in HCMC aren't like in the States -- they aren't segregated by economic class -- you have nice houses right next to shanties.