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markdohle

Choose one or the other

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Choose one or the other

We choose to trust, a hard one. We also choose not to trust, to become fearful, bitter and isolated. This choice is easier because it is something we know and understand.

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Choosing trust is one thing but so is choosing to betray that trust.

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Choosing to trust, for a human, is difficult--especially if he or she has experienced betrayal, evasion or denial. However, trust is a more expressive term for "faith," which has been cheapened by such non-starters as "blind faith."

My experience and tradition support this approach, that trust is a steady assurance that the oncoming nature of reality (the future) is essentially good, and that the well-being of humanity and the earth are in good (anthropomorphic) hands.

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I think choosing not to trust is a more rational choice.

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Why can't you choose a third option (conditionally trusting or conditionally untrusting) or a fourth one (neutral on the issue)? Why the binary option?

Life is not binary!

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Posted (edited)

I'm a person who conditionally trusts most people. Life has taught me that not everyone is trustworthy. Maybe the idea is to live a life free of fear, or at least as free as we can make it, and let trust flow out of that.

Edited by Beany
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StarMountainKid, if something is in the end detrimental to a full human life, it is not rational. It is like we handle things today. We still go to war, even though we know in the end no one really wins.....or if they do, it is only for a short time, with a heavy toll on life.

It is easier to give up; because it is so common it is considered the wise thing to do. In reality it is a form of craziness. Now I partake of that craziness, this is something I have worked with all of my life, not always successful, but when I fail I know that I do. When I can break the cycle I am freer, when I don't, I feel safer, alone, and not overly happy.

I trust in the process of life, that our lives have meaning, and overcoming our fears is one of the most important hurdles. I have found, my personal experience, is that the deeper I go into my relationship with the "Infinite", the more I am able to grow out of ways of dealing with life that are limiting and in the end dehumanizing.

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Why can't you choose a third option (conditionally trusting or conditionally untrusting) or a fourth one (neutral on the issue)? Why the binary option?

Life is not binary!

No life is not…. but our choices are.....yes or no, go forward or go backward, to be honest or not. Our stance towards life is a choice, even though it may come from some deep unconscious source. One point of the spiritual life is to be able to understand the irrational aspect of how we deal with life.

Choosing to trust, for a human, is difficult--especially if he or she has experienced betrayal, evasion or denial. However, trust is a more expressive term for "faith," which has been cheapened by such non-starters as "blind faith."

My experience and tradition support this approach, that trust is a steady assurance that the oncoming nature of reality (the future) is essentially good, and that the well-being of humanity and the earth are in good (anthropomorphic) hands.

Very well said my friend, better than I could ever do.....thank you!!!!!

Peace

mark

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Choosing trust is one thing but so is choosing to betray that trust.

I am not saying that trust can always be regained with some one person, it is the over withdrawral that can happen when we are betrayed, hurt etc., that I am talking about. It is easier to put up walls, understandable, I do it, fight against it, but it is not the best choice.......

peace

mark

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StarMountainKid, if something is in the end detrimental to a full human life, it is not rational. It is like we handle things today. We still go to war, even though we know in the end no one really wins.....or if they do, it is only for a short time, with a heavy toll on life.

It is easier to give up; because it is so common it is considered the wise thing to do. In reality it is a form of craziness. Now I partake of that craziness, this is something I have worked with all of my life, not always successful, but when I fail I know that I do. When I can break the cycle I am freer, when I don't, I feel safer, alone, and not overly happy.

I trust in the process of life, that our lives have meaning, and overcoming our fears is one of the most important hurdles. I have found, my personal experience, is that the deeper I go into my relationship with the "Infinite", the more I am able to grow out of ways of dealing with life that are limiting and in the end dehumanizing.

In what are we trusting? I trust in the process of life, too. The universe is just the universe, life on this planet is just as it is. I trust the universe and life to behave as it does. My relationship with the "Infinite" is the same as my relationship of the physical universe, which is an expression of the "Infinite".

I think it is more rational and makes life more secure to trust with caution, with an understanding of human nature. I don't consider dealing with life in this way limiting in any way or dehumanizing. Being realistic about such matters is contrarily enlightening. One must have a clear vision of reality as it is and not of what one desires it to be.

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In what are we trusting? I trust in the process of life, too. The universe is just the universe, life on this planet is just as it is. I trust the universe and life to behave as it does. My relationship with the "Infinite" is the same as my relationship of the physical universe, which is an expression of the "Infinite".

I think it is more rational and makes life more secure to trust with caution, with an understanding of human nature. I don't consider dealing with life in this way limiting in any way or dehumanizing. Being realistic about such matters is contrarily enlightening. One must have a clear vision of reality as it is and not of what one desires it to be.

I do agree we must each strive for a 'clear' vision of reality...to not do so is a tragedy I believe.

Peace

Mark

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I do agree we must each strive for a 'clear' vision of reality...to not do so is a tragedy I believe.

Yes. Quoting the last sentence in my above post # 10, "One must have a clear vision of reality as it is and not as what one desires it to be". This is where people create problems for themselves and for others...tragedies.

In my view, objective observation is essential for this kind of clear view of reality. Adding subjective 'extras' to what is observed distorts reality. This creates all sorts of beliefs based on personal desires. "What is" is good enough for me.

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No life is not…. but our choices are.....yes or no, go forward or go backward, to be honest or not. Our stance towards life is a choice, even though it may come from some deep unconscious source. One point of the spiritual life is to be able to understand the irrational aspect of how we deal with life.

Maybe, stay put, say nothing. Even your examples aren't binary.
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Posted (edited)

Choose one or the other

We choose to trust, a hard one. We also choose not to trust, to become fearful, bitter and isolated. This choice is easier because it is something we know and understand.

Every choice you make is based on trust - the trust you have in yourself to make the best choice for yourself. That trust in yourself is, in the final reckoning, the only trust that really matters.

Edited by Leonardo
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I choose option (3).

Trust.

But Verify.

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Why can't you choose a third option (conditionally trusting or conditionally untrusting) or a fourth one (neutral on the issue)? Why the binary option?

Life is not binary!

Those who choose to be neutral are boring :clap: I choose untrusting.

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Every choice you make is based on trust - the trust you have in yourself to make the best choice for yourself. That trust in yourself is, in the final reckoning, the only trust that really matters.

This is very close to what I was thinking too. Genuine trust can only arise if we have trust in ourselves first. If we have no trust in our own powers of discernment, then we become followers by default and have suspended our capacity to comprehend and understand by default of that in turn.

Trust in what we ourselves see is the key to trusting another in accordance with the integrity of what they are offering us in turn. We would never trust a salesman or telephone scammer, that is obvious but we do ourselves a disservice if we extend that mistrust to the populace at large and even our family and friends.

Some things we can base our trust on because we have tested their voracity and integrity, some things we can allow ourselves to trust on faith because the odds are in favour of our trust being sound and capable of bringing the best out of the person we have placed that trust in aka: most people do make good and hard working loyal employees because by far and large most people feel that they like to earn a living rather than take something they have not given fair exchange for. This is shown by how successful the employer and employee relationship is the world over - a real level of productivity is a apparent everywhere we look. Fair exchange is a predominant feature in humanity it seems.

So there are many basic levels of trust we can and should accept unless we want to be cynical and see the people of the world as inherently of little value.

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This is a tough one to answer.

I honestly wish I could say that I'd choose trust but I don't think I can ever choose trust. I'd love to trust people but I can't even fully trust the people closest to me.

I have had my trust broken so many times that even though I can convince misled I trust someone fully, I know deep down that I really don't and dread the day they'll leave me.

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This is a tough one to answer.

I honestly wish I could say that I'd choose trust but I don't think I can ever choose trust. I'd love to trust people but I can't even fully trust the people closest to me.

I have had my trust broken so many times that even though I can convince misled I trust someone fully, I know deep down that I really don't and dread the day they'll leave me.

While it is true that trust has to be earned, and that some people can't really get it back, still, to trust in the process of life is a choice, just as despair and bitterness are. Trust, coming from a deeper place, is harder because it is a freer choice.

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I really don't think I can trust in the process of life either. I'm always wondering how my life will turn out and what all will happen on this journey. But this may be a good survival mechanism. Putting my trust in anything else but me isn't good either. I think we need to put trust in ourselves (which I struggle with too) in order to have favorable outcomes. :)

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