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A Philosophical Question


StarMountainKid

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On 2016-06-22 at 3:30 PM, Farmer77 said:

Yeah we aint living in Mayberry anymore. Never call the cops unless you're OK with the subject you are calling about dying. 

Not every country's cops have a long history of murdering innocents, remember.

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In truth, you are not certain where the cord came from or how Runt got it.  But you have convinced yourself of a plausible theory, and now you are emotionally involved  You are conspiring with a friend who you believe stole something from another friend.  Does you enable Runt to do this again and again when he is drunk?  Is that a good situation for you, Bobby, or Runt?  Thought question: how big does the offense have to be before you behave differently?  A toaster, a coin collection worth $1000?   This seems like a very unstable situation if the revelation of Runt's crime would bring down such strong angry feelings as you describe.   

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1 minute ago, Tatetopa said:

In truth, you are not certain where the cord came from or how Runt got it.  But you have convinced yourself of a plausible theory, and now you are emotionally involved  You are conspiring with a friend who you believe stole something from another friend.  Does you enable Runt to do this again and again when he is drunk?  Is that a good situation for you, Bobby, or Runt?  Thought question: how big does the offense have to be before you behave differently?  A toaster, a coin collection worth $1000?   This seems like a very unstable situation if the revelation of Runt's crime would bring down such strong angry feelings as you describe.   

Yes, I have a plausible theory, but I'm not really emotionally involved, it's more of an interesting situation. I am a conspirator in the sense that I bought the item intending to return it to its rightful owner. I promise not to do it again. I've not known Runt to steal before, he's not known around here as a thief, the neighbors seem to trust him. He lived with another neighbor for about two months with no criminal results. Now he's living with another neighbor. If he was known for stealing stuff, the neighbors wouldn't let him be around here.

Bobby has COPD and is constantly on oxygen. He spends most of his time in bed, when he does get out to sit with friends in the back yard he's usually trying to breathe and doesn't say much.

This is why I haven't asked him if he's missing a cord. He probably wouldn't know, anyway. I don't want to upset him in his condition by mentioning the situation and Runt's possible involvement. Bobby has a bad temper and this would not be beneficial to his present health.

So I'm just letting it ride for now. Maybe the subject of a missing extension cord will be brought up some day by someone. Then I'll make a decision. 

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Well, you are done for receiving stolen property if he actually stole it ! I suspect the owner of the cord will know who pinched it, and the punishment will be "Runt" is looking for new accomodation. I hope you are not asked to house him !

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Getting too close to neighbours often leads to problems. Years ago I was a single guy living next door to a recently married young couple. The visually attractive wife seemed to suffer from unruly carnal urges, and several times tried to seduce me, when the husband was out of town. I kept out, but agonised over whether the husband ought to know what a disloyal horror he had married. For better or worse, he had to find out for himself, some years later, as I remained silent.

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10 hours ago, Habitat said:

Getting too close to neighbours often leads to problems. Years ago I was a single guy living next door to a recently married young couple. The visually attractive wife seemed to suffer from unruly carnal urges, and several times tried to seduce me, when the husband was out of town. I kept out, but agonised over whether the husband ought to know what a disloyal horror he had married. For better or worse, he had to find out for himself, some years later, as I remained silent.

Yes, I'm friendly with the neighbors but don't get too close to them. The best neighbor is one who smiles and waves when he sees you, then carries on with his own business and you do the same. :)

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If it were me... I'd not be so certain of the source, but if I had doubts, I'd hand the cord back to Runt, along with a fiver and tell him to go put the cord back where he found it. 

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25 minutes ago, quiXilver said:

If it were me... I'd not be so certain of the source, but if I had doubts, I'd hand the cord back to Runt, along with a fiver and tell him to go put the cord back where he found it. 

Good idea in its way. I could just tell him I don't need it, he can have it back. What he does with it after that is none of my business. It might belong to him in the first place, maybe he loaned it to Bobby and then took it back. Who knows?

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Friends don't backstab each other. If he stole one time and see that it worked, he might stole another stuffs and walk the same path.

If he had any kind of intention to give back or make "present", he could simply go directly and say : "Hey buddy, could you lend me some money? I promise I'd return it!"

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  • 1 month later...

To bring this complicated thread to conclusion, Bobby, has COPD and was constantly on oxygen. Recently bobby's mind had been confused and he has spent most of his time at home as he can no longer move about very well or take care of himself.

I found out that Sunday a disreputable girl was seen running out of Bobby's house, ran down the street and was picked up by some friend of hers in a car. Bobby used to foolishly carry a lot of cash, this time is was $4000 in his pocket.

Monday morning his sister knocked on my door asking if I had a key to Bobby's house. I did not. She had been trying to contact him at his home with no result. Me, Runt and a few neighbors went to his house with his sister but couldn't get in. Bobby's other sister came with a key. They found Bobby unresponsive without his oxygen hooked up to him. He always had his oxygen (oxygen bottle with hose placed in his nose). The $4000 was missing.

He wasn't breathing, so Runt punched him in the chest and he started breathing. Ambulance was called, took him to the hospital. Today I learned he was on life-support and was to be unplugged this morning. The doctors say he is brain-dead.

So, did the disreputable girl go in his house, steal the money, unplug Bobby's oxygen and leave? (Bobby was pretty helpless at this point) Another twist to the story.

By the way, Runt, who was actually Bobby's best friend, and Bobby's sisters are now in Bobby's house looking for the cash if it's hidden somewhere, cleaning the house and whatever. I still don't know where the extension cord came from, but I suppose that doesn't matter now.

 

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~ RiP ~

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On 22/06/2016 at 6:48 PM, StarMountainKid said:

I think this is a sort of philosophical question I have.

 

 

I live in a small enclave where all the neighbors know each other, have known each other for years, and we often gather in someone’s back yard, talk and have a nice time together. A person who drinks a bit and sometimes stays with neighbors, as he has no home of his own (Runt), who is also a member of our little community, came by yesterday and offered to sell me a long extension cord for $5. Most likely he needed the money for another beer.

 

 

I figured he had taken it from someone he had just been visiting in the neighborhood (Bobby). I bought it, thinking I’d return it to its rightful owner. My philosophical question is: should I return the cord to Bobby, not telling him who took it, telling him who took it, or should I just keep it and say nothing?

 

 

The thing is, if I just return it, Bobby will correctly guess who stole it anyway, and that will cause trouble between Bobby and Runt. It will also cause trouble between all the other neighbors who know Runt and are friends with him. Runt will be ostracized by his friends, which is not good because he sometimes stays with them, having no home of his own. It will also cause animosity between Runt and me. Runt and I are friends, as well. I don't want to be cruel to Runt because he's basically a good person, though he occasionally has his failures because of his alcohol problem. He does work every day for a lawn-care company in the summer and does odd jobs, so he's not a bum.

 

 

If I keep quiet, Bobby is without his extension cord, Runt got away with theft, and I will feel odd talking to Bobby knowing I have his property and not telling him.

 

 

What’s the right thing to do?

This reply is based on the premise that the cord was taken by Runt from someone else.

While the opportunity is now probably gone, I would have offered Runt the $5 he was asking for to put the cord back where he found it. Phrasing that in a non-confrontational and tactful way, of course.

As it is, your only real solution now is to try to sneak the cord back to it's rightful owner. Unfortunately, you have also reinforced Runt's behaviour of taking other people's things to earn money for his habit.

Edited by Leonardo
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At this point the problem is moot, but there is a lesson to be learned.  I have an electric mower and the cord for it is pricy.  If a so called friend took it and sold it to my neighbor, I would really like to know.  That is not being a friend. As bad off as Bobby was, it is just vultures picking off the wounded.  That is something I don't stomach well. I would have ask Runt how he got the cord when he showed up and told him I saw him going in without the cord and coming out of Bobby's with it.  Runt doesn't sound like much of a friend and more of a user.  

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This had such a sad ending...

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Thanks for all the comments. Probably I should have done something different, but at the time I thought I was doing the right thing. This space is too short to describe thoroughly all the personalities involved and circumstances and relationships between the guilty and innocent and those with good intentions.

In other words, there's more to the story if I were to go into details and histories of the personalities of the people involved.

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Don't have any remorse, you seem like a great person, you shared this difficult story here to know what we might have done, i'm not sure if I would of done better considering circumstances you described.

Condolescence to you, family for friend death.

Be at peace with this story.

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