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GypsySoul

Conjoining Empathy

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Hello, fellow travelers. I came upon this website because of reading "An Empath" by Alex Myles. I first became aware that I'm an empath about four years ago. This was a tumultuous time in my life...elderly mother depending on me and moving toward her own death, grown children trying to find their way in the world, a marriage that was falling off the cliff, loss of employment, and, then, my own anguish about the weights that I felt were piled on my shoulders. 

I've been different all my life; I first became aware of this in my early teenage years.. I know how trite that sounds on a website like this, but it's only now I'm beginning to embrace it as an exquisite gift, one to which I want to give full life. What I'm working so hard to do now is separate the psychic damage from an extremely ill family-of-origin and the fact that I now realize I possess an inner knowing that many people do not. I want to give my energy to my role on this planet as an empath, but I want to do it without the rage that comes from the injustice of and abuse from those who were my first connections in this life: mother, father, sister and sister. 

Of the five of us, only my now-deceased mother and I had any clue of what lies beyond and above. She died before she could realize her own value. Me, I'm still living. I want to get this right, once and for all. 

I'm definitely an intellectual (not college trained) who sees, feels and understands the deepest depths of what it is to be human on this planet. For a while, about five years ago, I feared that I was really becoming like Buddha and didn't even need to breathe. My anguish was so great that, as I was crying, I would exhale and realized—in a very real way—I didn't need to inhale for an unproscribed amount of time. That's when I really scared myself and understood that I am something very different. I want to know what it is.

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Hello,

We are all unique. To become involved in your own self discovery, I encourage building a love bond with your higher self.

John

 

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Hmm I don't understand the part about exhale... but anyway, nice to see you here. ;)

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Posted (edited)

On 19/09/2017 at 8:41 AM, GypsySoul said:

Hello, fellow travelers. I came upon this website because of reading "An Empath" by Alex Myles. I first became aware that I'm an empath about four years ago. This was a tumultuous time in my life...elderly mother depending on me and moving toward her own death, grown children trying to find their way in the world, a marriage that was falling off the cliff, loss of employment, and, then, my own anguish about the weights that I felt were piled on my shoulders. 

I've been different all my life; I first became aware of this in my early teenage years.. I know how trite that sounds on a website like this, but it's only now I'm beginning to embrace it as an exquisite gift, one to which I want to give full life. What I'm working so hard to do now is separate the psychic damage from an extremely ill family-of-origin and the fact that I now realize I possess an inner knowing that many people do not. I want to give my energy to my role on this planet as an empath, but I want to do it without the rage that comes from the injustice of and abuse from those who were my first connections in this life: mother, father, sister and sister. 

Of the five of us, only my now-deceased mother and I had any clue of what lies beyond and above. She died before she could realize her own value. Me, I'm still living. I want to get this right, once and for all. 

I'm definitely an intellectual (not college trained) who sees, feels and understands the deepest depths of what it is to be human on this planet. For a while, about five years ago, I feared that I was really becoming like Buddha and didn't even need to breathe. My anguish was so great that, as I was crying, I would exhale and realized—in a very real way—I didn't need to inhale for an unproscribed amount of time. That's when I really scared myself and understood that I am something very different. I want to know what it is.

Hi, I understand when you speak of the exhale inhaling thing and becoming like Buddha.  I at times find that in holding my breath which is a gentle feeling almost unconsciously, In my mind i feel as if I'm in a vast area which is empty but I'm not alone. It's peaceful and to me it feels like a little death. I wish I could articulate this better but feel I'd confuse myself let alone you all. Anyway I'm glad you said that because I get it.. 

Edited by MauriOra

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1 hour ago, MauriOra said:

Hi, I understand when you speak of the exhale inhaling thing and becoming like Buddha.  I at times find that in holding my breath which is a gentle feeling almost unconsciously, In my mind i feel as if I'm in a vast area which is empty but I'm not alone. It's peaceful and to me it feels like a little death. I wish I could articulate this better but feel I'd confuse myself let alone you all. Anyway I'm glad you said that because I get it.. 

Ahhhh! Being unconscious, now I sort of get the past about breathing... actually that sounds cool and I feel the biggest problems I have is being too conscious... especially about my emotions...

yurk.. my stupid consciousness... 

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