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Forsaken Hero

i need your opinion

13 posts in this topic

im in a band thats just starting out... we are an emo/ screamo/ metal band and me and the bass player wrote some lyrics....

i was wondering if u guys thought they were any good...

Here's the plan.

I saw an angel today. standing atop a revolving black light burning down the world. it watches the children as there flesh melts like candles in a death ridden black out. move along to a new time. grab a gun and let the bullets fly. no one cares. everyone will die. sometime. cut the crap and be a man. its everyone for themselves, time to kill. There’s no turning back now. Everyone sees life in a whole new way, bodies filled with lead implants of destruction, the cast iron framework melts into an aluminum lifeline, being corroded by the light. as I stand there. shaking with pride. knowing I just did everything the world needed. (everything the world needed)

- Forsaken Hero

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well...it sounds like itd be a killer song!! very awesome...but what is the symbolism? up until the part where u start killin ppl, i thought that u were talkin about the hole in the ozone layer...but then u kinda lost me. could u give us some background information as to what its about?

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i like just about all music I seen a few lines that rhymed. I like rhymes better to me those lyrics are ok....

Raiting of 1 - 10 I give it 3 whistling2.gif

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I think it sounds pretty gnarl! thumbsup.gif

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its ok...its not the greatest...but...you know...

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I think it sounds really good. Would like to hear it with music...

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the song is about how there are way to many people in places they shouldnt be (not trying to stereotype or generalize) like how african americans, should be in africa and arabs should be in the middle eastern area, so what the world needs is the seperation of the people and were gonna do it in a very violent way mthe bass player wrote the sog, and he's very violent so dont hold me a ccountable for how violent this song is i wrote the part....

"Everyone sees life in a whole new way, bodies filled with lead implants of destruction, the cast iron framework melts into an aluminum lifeline, being corroded by the light. "

thats what i contributed, kinda like the band Thursday, but not as good

and um, not all songs rhyme, none of the bands we like have rhymes in there songs ( boys night out, from auntumn to ashes, fordirelifesake) maybe a few rhymes but not many.....

sry if i come off as being a horrible racist person, didnt mean it that way

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im no good at typing, sorry, try to put it together

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okey doekey then

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a song about segregation? that'll go over like a fart in church. rolleyes.gif

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The lyrics are ok,i prefer a bit more clarity in the lyrics,but hidden clarity,behind metaphors etc.but i think it would make a good song. thumbsup.gif

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'Tis my personal opinion dude, that if the lyrics of a song carry the message without further explanation then the lyrics rock. If it only makes sense to you, then........i guess you rock.....but alone in a closet somewhere. blink.gif Just Kidding.

The Lyrics are OK. Not Great. But OK. Just remember that the lyrics don't, won't carry the song...they carry the message of the song. The MUSIC carries the song. The music IS the song. Good Luck

Joc

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Sounds like the world the way it is today and like Joc said

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