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talking to myself

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personal stuff

Entries in this blog

 

2:30 AM

2:30 AM the crystal clear sky in the early morning night thankfulness followed

markdohle

markdohle

 

11th Step retreat

11th step retreat (I have been asked to give a retreat on the 11th step, below is not the actual talk, but just some thoughts I have put together) (Sought through prayer and mediation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.) We carry our past with us, well perhaps it is best to say, that I carry my past with me. My relationship with my parents and brothers and sister, my chil

markdohle

markdohle

 

11th Step in the AA program (a talk I gave a few years ago)

11th step retreat (Sought through prayer and mediation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.) We carry our past with us, well perhaps it is best to say, that I carry my past with me. My relationship with my parents and brothers and sister, my childhood friends and experiences and yes, also what I was taught about God. As I look back, I can see, how more often than not, God is ofte

markdohle

markdohle

 

11th step AA group

11th step AA group Had the 11th step AA group here this weekend; they have been coming here for years. We have three different AA groups come here and I find myself very attached to each one. Doing the 12 steps keep you real and you feet on the ground. It is a place of community and acceptance, as well as compassion and empathy. Is it perfect? No of course not, each community or grouping of peoples has its problems. It is in the problems and the adaptations that allow growth to hap

markdohle

markdohle

 

101 years old in August

101 years old in August Luke will be 101 years old in August. On his 100th birthday it was a big deal, lots of visitors, visits from newspapers, and of course there was a big party, something Luke loves. He likes being the center of attention, loves people and has a made an art out of making them laugh. As this birthday approaches he is quieter, does not talk about it much and he seems to be tiring. Three days ago he was having a bad time of it and he slept most of the day and night. He w

markdohle

markdohle

 

(The final days of a beloved pet)

Love is love after all (The final days of a beloved pet) Many people do not understand the depth of love that many pet owners have for their charges.  Blitz was one of our dogs and my mom had a deep connection with him.  Blitz was a boxer and very intelligent, sometimes uncannily so. When Blitz died, my mom would never allow herself to have another dog, the loss was so painful for her.  I talked with a friend today whose beloved pet is nearing death.  She is a nurse and she spends

markdohle

markdohle

(Salve Window in our Monastic Church)

(Salve Window in our Monastic Church)

Mary and the Holy Trinity (Salve Window in our Monastic Church) Our Salve-Window shows how the Holy Trinity is involved in Mary’s greatness. This brings to light the Trinity’s love, and the freely given grace, as well as her special place in our Christian Faith. It also shows as well the Trinitarian desire for the destiny of all men and women. Mary shows us what we are all called to…..oneness with the Holy Trinity.   The Father pointing, saying this is my Beloved Son, listen to Him. The

markdohle

markdohle

 

(It takes a long time to become fully human)

Our deepest longing (It takes a long time to become fully human) A great source of suffering for me is that I often feel chained and anchored in ways of being that keep me from being fully human.   That may sound silly, for of course I am human.  However we are not instinct bound creatures.  We have the potential to either becoming loving or unloving.  I believe that humans are the only creatures that are known who have deep moral dilemmas that arise from some inner compass which points t

markdohle

markdohle

 

(Faith, NDE’s, Connection and the life-review

Going deeper in and higher up (Faith, NDE’s, Connection and the life-review) We are all, truly, in this together. But we have fooled ourselves into a false sense of separation, whether from secularist and deterministic Newtonian science or the competitive dogma spewed to the masses from religious zealots of diverse beliefs that run counter to the original unifying principles in the mystical traditions of all of the great faiths. The fundaments and birthright of this universe are based in

markdohle

markdohle

(“And Jacob wrestled with God)

(“And Jacob wrestled with God)

Surrendering to love (“And Jacob wrestled with God”)   For me, the concept of surrender brings to mind some sort of previous struggle. It has a warlike feel to it, something that can be a long arduous exchange. Jacob in his struggle with God was wounded and for the rest of his life, he had a painful limp.   When meditating on the Scriptures they can be used analogically in order to derive some benefit from it. Jacob wrestled all night with his concept of God brought to ‘flesh’, it was a mig

markdohle

markdohle

“You are the light of the world.”

“You are the light of the world.”

“You are the light of the world.” (Jesus tightens the screws, as he always does.) Homily Preached February 9, 2020 by Fr. Cassian OCSO “You are the light of the world.” Last Sunday we heard the words of Simeon as he held the infant Jesus in the Temple: “My eyes have seen a light for revelation to the Gentiles and the glory of your people Israel.” The light Simeon proclaimed is the same light we proclaim at Easter: Christ our Light. Today we hear that we are the light of the world. How

markdohle

markdohle

 

“Where your treasure is there also will your

“Where your treasure is there also will your heart be” People in general, unless they have some sort of personality disorder, give the impression of wanting to be more truly human.  We admire those who display compassion and empathy, especially when it is directed towards us and we enjoy being around them.  We ponder concepts like ‘justice’ and ‘mercy’, though they are not easily achieved.  Injustice and the seeking of revenge appear to be the stronger force, but that is because when acte

markdohle

markdohle

 

“Today, if you hear his voice,

“Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as in the rebellion.” (Hebrews 3:15) Every child who, rather than being born, is condemned unjustly to being aborted, bears the face of Jesus Christ, bears the face of the Lord, who even before he was born, and then just after birth, experienced the world’s rejection. And every elderly person…even if he is ill or at the end of his days bears the face of Christ. They cannot be discarded, as the ‘culture of waste’ suggests!---Pope F

markdohle

markdohle

 

“Now’ is actually all we have

“Now’ is actually all we have “O Supreme Good, I want to love You as no one on earth has ever loved You before! I want to adore You with every moment of my life and unite my will closely to Your holy will. My life is not drab or monotonous, but it is varied like a garden of fragrant flowers, so that I don’t know which flower to pick first, the lily of suffering or the rose of love of neighbor or the violet of humility. I will not enumerate these treasures in which my every day abounds

markdohle

markdohle

 

“I call you not “I call you not to lose hope”

December 25 Monthly Medjugorje Message “I call you not to lose hope” “Dear children! With great joy, today I am carrying my Son Jesus to you, for Him to give you His peace. Open your hearts, little children, and be joyful that you can receive it. Heaven is with you and is fighting for peace in your hearts, in the families and in the world; and you, little children, help with your prayers for it to be so. I bless you with my Son Jesus and call you not to lose hope; and f

markdohle

markdohle

 

“I am so agitated all the time”, he told me (You can’t heard cats or people if you try your head will explode)

“I am so agitated all the time”, he told me (You can’t heard cats or people if you try your head will explode) Just about anything that is discussed that has to deal with relationships can sound so like a cliché, but none-the-less can be true. A cliché can become something life giving if what it proposes is entered into and experienced and struggled with. In all of our lives I think it important that we find that place, or center, that we can actually choose to change and grow, eve

markdohle

markdohle

 

“Depart from me for I am a sinful man”

“Depart from me for I am a sinful man”   This a beautiful homily that the Abbot (Dom Augustine) gave this last Sunday  This is a beautiful take on Lk: 5:1-11 5th Sunday of Ordinary Time      February 5  2019            Lk 5: 1-11 In today’s gospel we have the powerful scene of Peter on his knees saying: “Depart from me for I am a sinful man”. I ponder it first thinking of what Jesus did not say explicitly or implicitly: He did not say to Peter you really are not. Don’t be hard on yours

markdohle

markdohle

"We become what we hate"

"We become what we hate"

"We become what we hate".   There is an old saying "We become what we hate". It is a paradox, absurd, yet when I attack someone on whatever grounds, I tend to become the very thing I am fighting.   It is as if we have seeds laying within, more or less dormant, and they only take root when watered by someone who is out front with their opinions that I do not agree with You have to fight fire with fire, which only makes a very big bonfire.   It is all ver

markdohle

markdohle

 

‘Grief Retreat’ in January 8-10thth 2016

‘Grief Retreat’ in January 8-10thth 2016 Every January we have a ‘Grief Retreat’. It is a one of the more difficult retreats that we have. When people come they are struggling with their losses. In Jan of 2014 a young woman attending the retreat, wanted to speak to me about her journey after losing her daughter. She was intelligent, faith filled and able to express herself in an eloquent manner, both in how she spoke but also in how she was able to write about it. I was so taken by her

markdohle

markdohle

 

. To let others know that our lives are impo

.  To let others know that our lives are important and that God pursues us for a reason   “How many times do we hear: 'Come on, you Christians, be a little bit more normal, like other people, and be reasonable!' This is real snake charmer's talk: 'Come on, just be like this, okay? A little bit more normal, don't be so rigid ...' But behind it is this: 'Don't come here with your stories, that God became man!' The Incarnation of the Word, that is the scandal behind all of this! We can

markdohle

markdohle

 

Mistakes christians make when dialoguing with Atheists

From: Christian Apologetics and Research Ministry www.carm.org Most Christians mean well when they defend their faith. But, too often, many make fundamental errors when dialoguing with atheists. We need to make as few errors as possible, not simply to win an argument, but to help the atheist come to a saving relationship with the Lord Jesus. Following are common mistakes made by theists when dialoguing with atheists. Labeling Atheists Some Christians have labeled atheist

markdohle

markdohle