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talking to myself

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personal stuff

Entries in this blog

 

Unraveling of knots

Unraveling of knots (a saint who does not look like one) When working as retreat/guest master I have the honor of meeting many diverse people. It is true that the saying “one of the many” does apply to each of us. We share many traits with one-another. Human experience in all of its varieties are everyday occurrences, yet each unique as well. One thing we all have in common is that we all have conflicts and struggles that accompany all of us on our journeys through life. The better w

markdohle

markdohle

 

Unmasked

Unmasked Slowly the skin is peeled back, the ego faced with its nakedness, before unknown, though a desire to flee from self revelation present, its futility understood, f or once shown, to retrace is impossible; when blindness lost, no matter how precious, gone forever, t he darkness no longer a refuge from the gift presented. Sharp and true is the two edged knife of self knowledge, wounding the soul deeply; anxieties, pain, unstable, fearful of the t

markdohle

markdohle

 

Unique to each

Unique to each Each carries a burden bringing with its own species of pain unique to each. To judge another harshly is to forget ones own inner struggle and suffering. Our failures are important since they lead to the realization of our need for grace and healing. Allowing us to understand this is true for all those around us who struggle and fall.

markdohle

markdohle

 

Unfolding

Unfolding It is hard at times to understand what makes others tick, so alien we can be to one another. So much alike, yet vast differences can lead to times when building bridges is almost impossible. Simple gestures, carefully chosen words, even smiles, can be interrupted in ways not dreamed of. I have had this experience a couple of times in my life when this has happened. There can be a great deal of frustration from both sides. The only road to peace is to simply accept the impasse, and ho

markdohle

markdohle

 

Unfolding

Unfolding It is hard to understand what makes others tick, so alien we can be to one another. So much alike, yet vast differences can lead to situations when building bridges is almost impossible. Simple gestures, carefully chosen words, even smiles, can be interrupted in ways not dreamed of. I have had this experience a couple of times in my life when this has happened. There can be a great deal of frustration from both sides, the only road to peace is to simply accept the impasse, a

markdohle

markdohle

 

Unfinished symphonies

She at times drives me to distraction with her neediness, Calling me, just wanting to talk about things, Perhaps to cry over hurts she has accumulated, Or complains about her friend, The one she loves. Not young anymore, has not been for a long time, Nearing her 70’s, Yet like a teenager in her desires for someone, A man to come swooping in and save her, To ride off into the sunset, Which of course will never happen. She is intelligent, Well educated and articulate. It

markdohle

markdohle

Uneasiness in prayer

Uneasiness in prayer

Uneasiness in prayer   You think that your inability to pray without distractions is an obstacle to My grace. Were that so, I would not have been able to sanctify a great number of those whom My Church honors as saints. Distractions, when they are not entertained willfully, are no obstacle to My work in a soul. My grace passes through them to touch the center of the soul wherein all is still and in readiness for My healing and sanctifying touch. Come to Me   A Benedictine Monk. In Sinu Jesu:

markdohle

markdohle

 

Undone

One man one women, Just another day for both, Unknown to each other, Just another lonely day, Then one look, A smile, Both became undone.

markdohle

markdohle

 

Understanding Mercy

Understanding Mercy +Mankind will not have peace until it turns with trust to My mercy. Faustina diary 300/2 One way to look at mercy is to understand that there are many levels in experiencing it. As Jesus said, the one who is forgiven much loves much. What does that mean? People can ask for mercy but do not understand the true depth of their offense. However, the more they grow in their relationship with God (or with loved ones); the more also their underst

markdohle

markdohle

 

Understanding mercy

If you understand God’s mercy, think again and even then its depth will evade human understanding. Its breadth is beyond human comprehension. That is why we are not to judge, because infinite mercy is not possible to grasp, but it can be experienced and past on. True judgment is an illusion to all but God.

markdohle

markdohle

 

Understanding and forgiveness

Understanding and forgiveness People often think that humility is something that makes us meek and quiet and always telling everyone how little or worthless or unworthy we are! That is not humility..... humility is a virture that is based on being able to face the truth about ourselves and to not back away from it. I suppose being sick is quite a test, and also for those who are caregivers, since they see both the best and the worst of the one they are taking care of on a daily basis. Yes t

markdohle

markdohle

 

Under the illusion

Under the illusion I sometimes think that most of my “outer” life is an attempt to not look too closely to what is going on inside of me. I do spend time in prayer and meditation, also I read and study, yet even these activities can be used to avoid going deeper. I am often under the illusion that I know myself, but in the end I only see the surface. To go deeper; well it has taken me 58 years to get where I am at, wherever that is, so I suppose I will die still only experiencing and knowing

markdohle

markdohle

 

Unconscious ideas of God

Unconscious ideas of God One of the greatest obstacles for most people when dealing with God, are the images that are operative, either in their conscious mind, or in the unconscious. I would expect that our unconscious images could cause the most havoc, since they are deeply hidden, working behind the scenes, at times calling the shots in ones spiritual life. Some unconscious images of God can be terrifying, placed there when we were children, helpless to be able to discern the truth or fal

markdohle

markdohle

 

Unchallenged

In the morning the tree stood proud For all to see. Old, twisted from years of fighting the elements, Trunk long and strong with limbs thick and rugged, spreading shade, Roots deep in the earth, moist and fertile. Centuries it existed alone, Unchallenged, Marked with wounds from storms, Fiery strikes from the sky, It beauty deepened by such. Until one day it came, Its destiny, Winds strong, Clouds dark and low, Churning in dark beauty, Lighting came Struck in sh

markdohle

markdohle

 

Unbidden

Unbidden it comes, Often unexpected in its appearance, Softly it comes upon its prey, Who is interested only in what is before it, Swiftly it embraces from behind Filling its victim with its gift, Given when least expected, Happiness; The fruit of an open loving heart.

markdohle

markdohle

 

unbeknownst

The old man sat at the table by himself, Unnoticed if not ignored by others, Quiet, Looking down at the book he was reading, An aura of peace surrounding him, Content with his solitude Focused on the world within the book. The waitress has a kind heart, Easy to see in the gentle way she talks to him, Touching his shoulder, Asking in a whisper if he wants more coffee. He returns in kind, Smiling such a gentle way, I can see why she dotes on him. They see each other,

markdohle

markdohle

 

Unavoidable journey

Unavoidable journey There are a lot of bumps in the road for all of us. As we age the bumps, both the small ones, as well as the larger, get closer together. Sometimes they can seem like a cluster. Endurance is needed by everyone in order to get through life with any kind of success. There also seems to be some kind of law that says that when the fortitude that is needed to navigate our lives is avoided, things only get worse. Addictions, all kinds, not just the ones most people think a

markdohle

markdohle

 

Two ways

Two ways There always seems to be two ways in dealing with personal problems, both those in the present or those flowing from the past. Though it can be said that most of our problems (of the personal relational sort), in fact do flow from our past. So they are connected, even if hidden from consciousness. Of the two divergent ways that can be chosen, each have their own problems and set backs, at least in how they are experienced in our day to day interactions with others. We can blame, o

markdohle

markdohle

 

Two monastic customs for our deceased

Two monastic customs for our deceased We have two monastic traditions here.  The first is that for 30 days after death of one of our brothers, we have a simple shrine set up in his refectory (dinning area) place.  We have a large Crucifix and flowers as a reminder to pray for him.  Praying for the dead is not often understood by many non-Catholics, but I think that it is a beautiful custom.  In the Body of Christ we are never separated, so in death we are still one.  Fr. Anthony has simply

markdohle

markdohle

Two Kinds of Scandals

Two Kinds of Scandals

Two kinds of scandals   "Each soul is the object of My special love. That is why I am so grateful to those who are resourceful and bringing back sinners to Me. Keep this in mind then. I gave My life for them in the most atrocious torture, for these poor beloved ones. A humble repentance and they are already on My heart. So speak gently to them. Speak with tenderness. A brusque remark could drive them farther away. ---He and I March 6th 1947 +++++   Some people have a hard time unders

markdohle

markdohle

 

Two kinds of scandal

Two kinds of scandal "Each soul is the object of My special love. That is why I am so grateful to those who are resourceful and bringing back sinners to Me. Keep this in mind then. I gave My life for them in the most atrocious torture, for these poor beloved ones. A humble repentance and they are already on My heart. So speak gently to them. Speak with tenderness. A brusque remark could drive them farther away. ---He and I March 6th 1947 +++++ Some people have a hard

markdohle

markdohle

 

Turtle hunting at Pina beach

Turtle hunting at Pina beach Every once in awhile, mom and dad would ask us older ones if we would like to go to Pina beach to go turtle hunting with them, which I always jumped at the chance of going. I am pretty sure that it was in the dry season that we went, and for sure on a night of a full moon. It was so long ago, that certain memories are fuzzy, others still very sharp. All toll, I believe I went with them maybe four or five times over the years, mostly when I was between 14 and

markdohle

markdohle

 

Turnling point

Turning point Choices are very important, for they give directions to out lives and allow focus to result. Moments of choice are important for without them life can become something meaningless, leading nowhere, just endless cycles of the same. Important as our choices are, they also cause other avenues that could have been chosen to be put aside. So there is always a price to be paid when we discern the direction of our lives. Marriages and careers that are chosen are probably the mo

markdohle

markdohle

 

Trying to do the impossible

Trying to do the impossible If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other. Mother Teresa We get in trouble when we try to control others. We do not have much peace because we are trying to do the impossible. Compliance will come when force is applied, but underneath things will build up until there is a rebellion, either aggressively or in a more passive-aggressive manner. People can be reasoned with, I can be at times; if I do not

markdohle

markdohle

 

Trying to bring it all together

Trying to bring it all together There is always more than one side to any of us. True we are each unique, but we share a common humanity and that is what allows us to communicate with each other. Even with that however, we can only put before others a small fragment of who we are. We each have deep inner lives, often much of it hidden, but it can reveal itself if we have ways that allow the door to open a bit. I believe in each of us there are deep wells of joy and peace, as well as pa

markdohle

markdohle