So now I interrupt my documentation of events that have happened mostly one year ago to relate to all of you a strange incident that happened over the past few days.
It involves the mysterious disappearance of my ax. Here is what happened:
As I often do, after splitting firewood, a dropped my ax in the yard, intending to pick it up later – or whatever. When my wife came home that evening, she said: “Your ax is lying in the middle of the yard.”
I made a profound reply: “I know.”
The next day, a light snow sifted down from the gray Minnesota sky, our first snow of the year. I had an errand to run, and as I walked over to my car I noticed my ax, and made a mental note: “When I get back, I better pick up that ax in case it snows a lot because it might be hard to find if it gets covered with snow.”
I returned about a half hour later. The ground was lightly dusted with snow. I went over to my ax, only to see what you see in the picture below: The outline of where my ax once was.
No tracks around it – it was as if it had been lifted straight up, or just dissolved into nothing. (The implement you see next to the ax outline is a splitting wedge).
There were no tracks in the driveway either. Because of the light snow, I could see no one else had been in the yard, driving or walking.
To say the least, I was perplexed. When my wife came home, I told her about the missing ax, and we both puzzled over it. My wife told her mother and her brother about the strange incident. Everyone (except me) was in agreement that:
A. Someone had come into our yard and stolen the ax.
B. Perhaps one of my friends had stopped by to borrow the ax.
Of course, to me, it was incredibly obvious neither of these explanations could be true. If stolen, how did they manage to leave no tracks in the light dusting of snow?
The common explanation: “They” came and got the ax before the snow fell.
This could not be true for two reasons: I know it was snowing when I last saw the ax. And, second, if “They” had taken the ax before it snowed, why did the ax leave an outline of itself in the snow. Obviously the ax was lying there while being snowed upon.
A few other lame theories were passed around, but I’ll cut to the chase here and tell you what really happened.
What my wife and others did not know was this:
Before the ax vanished, my very dear friend Teshko, (pictured below) whom I believe to be a rare crow-raven hybrid, was acting rather strangely for several days.
For example, the previous day, I went for a walk in the Fields of Wylussa with my young niece so that we could have a discussion about the confluence of nature with art.
Teshko shadowed us the whole way, flitting from tree to tree above us, which is nothing that unusual because he follows me around all the time -- except this time he seemed unusually excited about something. He occasional snapped off a twig or a dried leaf and dropped it in our path, or sometimes behind us.
The only other bird I have seen do this kind of thing is the magpie, and then only when my cat gets too close to its nest. They chatter and dive bomb the cat with twigs and leaves. I told my little niece about this, and she said: “Maybe Teshko wants something to stay away from us, too.”
The next day, Teshko still seemed concerned about something. On one occasion, he did something he has never done before. I was writing, and stood up for a moment to look out the window. Teshko saw me and flew up to the window, tapped it, and flew back.
Then, as I turned away from the window – a black flash across the ground!
For fleeting micro instant, out of the corner of my eye, I saw a small, deeply black shape zip by on the grass!
What the hell was it!?
It was as black as Teshko, but was about the size of a small human boy, perhaps. All I got, though, was a fleeting impression of an amorphous black shape, but with a foot and one short, curved leg extended out from behind it – moving at lightening speed.
Across from where the black shape had appeared, Teshko was perched in a tree, looking rather smug, as if to say, “I told you so!”
If Teshko had not been acting strangely, I probably would have shrugged it all off. I probably would have immediately dismissed the fleeting glimpse of a black shape as an anomaly of eyesight or light, or something like that.
But then I started thinking about chronostasis.
Perhaps that’s what enabled me to see this strange black shadow sprint across the grass.
Chronostasis is something well understood by neural-physiologists. It is a perception that arises from a type of eye movement called a “saccade” which in turn leads to something called “Saccadic Masking.”
To experience saccadic masking for yourself, notice that when you look at yourself in the mirror, then look away, and look back again. You can never catch the movement of your own eye. That’s because of saccadic masking. In short, the brain is not fast enough to keep up with the speed of your eyes to it blanks out or "misses" your eye movement.
A saccade lasts from 20 to 200 milliseconds. Also, our eyes performs thousands of saccades every day – about 20 to 30 per minute -- so that means our visual perceptions are “off line” for a good part of each day – yet we never notice these “blind spots.”
There are many competing theories to explain how the brain “compensates” for the fact that our eyes can’t see anything for thousands saccades all day, which I won’t get into here because it is controversial.
But the whole saccade phenomenon has led some philosophers – such as Daniel Dennet – to suggest the “reality” we think we perceive with our eyesight is merely an illusion.
Rather, Dennet said that each of us is carrying our mind a “Cartesian Theater” – but I’m not going to get into that right now either.
NOW AN EXTREMELY IMPORTANT POINT:
The eyesight of human beings and that of birds is incredibly different because of this whole saccade issue – which is why I think Teshko was upset and wanted to warn me about the “black shape” running around in my living space – this entity was probably even “shadowing” my walk in the Fields of Wylussa with my young niece the previous day – which made Teshko upset. Perhaps he was even bombing the shadow entity with twigs like a magpie does to cats.
But back to bird eyesight: The saccade is more important to bird eyesight than to humans. That’s because of something called the “pectin oculi.” Birds have pectin oculi and we do not.
As human beings, we have blood vessels in front of our retinas, which partially obscure our frontal vision.
In birds, the pectin oculi lifts the blood vessels away from the front of the retina, which gives them highly superior direct vision, so to speak. In short, birds almost certainly can see things that we cannot, or at least see them a lot better.
But birds also need the pectin oculi to help respirate their fovea – and all this makes the saccade more integral to their perception – but let me not get too buried in all this bird physiology here.
I want to make one more interesting note, however: As a lifetime amateur astronomer, I long ago learned about something called “averted vision.” This is when you are trying to see a very dim star in the sky, but you can’t quite grasp it visually. If you move your eye slightly to the side of the dim star, you will be able to see it better. Averted vision has come in handy for me many times, especially in the past when I was really into telescopic variable star observation.
Of course, the reason “averted vision works” is because of what I just talked about: The blood vessels in the front of my retina blocks some of the light from a dim star, but if I “avert” my eye, I allow more light to enter and strike the cones and rods, which are the photoreceptor neurons in my eyes.
So I was thinking along these lines about the strange black “shadow entity, and then I also thought:
• Rapid back-and forth eye movement (REM) characterizes the lucid dream state
• Rapid back-and-forth eye movement is a known method for seeing the dead.
If you don’t believe that latter point, then I would direct you to the work of Dr. Allan Botkin, and something called EMDR, which stands for “Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing.”
In short, Botkin is a psychologist who treats people who have been traumatized over the deaths of loved ones, and he works primarily with soldiers who were badly traumatized in war, suffering through the death of their buddies – or tormented by the memory of people they had to kill.
Using a method that involved inducing back-and-forth movement of the eyes, traumatized veterans are able to “see” the people who are dead, and communicate with them.
So I wondered if this all worked together somehow: Chronostasis, rapid eye movement, averted visions, the superior pectin oculi enhancement of bird eyes, Teshko’s strange behavior …
So now let me continue with the ax incident:
As I suggested on my Minnesota Paranormala site, my first thought was that the Hidden People were the obvious suspects for swiping my ax.
Who else could lift my ax from this dimension without leaving any tracks in the snow? I know they are here, and that they like to cause mischief – the only problem is that I have been at peace with the Hidden People are about a year now.
In my previous posts about the Hidden People, I never told you about an incredible “final” encounter I had with the Hidden People after I inflicted the Hex of the Festering Five Flashes upon them.
Perhaps I will post the details of this event later – but the thrust of what you need to know is that the Hidden People made it clear to me that:
A. They acknowledged my existence as “real” (such as there is any reality).
B. That they now wished to live in peaceful coexistence with me from this point on.
There was this huge ceremonial banquet to seal the deal between us – again – I have not told you about any of this. The bottom line is, the Hidden People and I are enjoying a truce.
So when my ax disappeared, my first reaction was that it must have been the Hidden People – but this just didn’t sit well with me because I just couldn’t believe they would provoke me again, and for no reason, especially after the fabulous peace banquet.
I was certain of one thing, however: Teshko knew something.
Fortunately, I think I knew a way that I could get more information out of him.
So the next day with the ax still missing, I spent the day as I usually do writing endless pages of schlock to make a buck, but I also attuned myself all day to Teshko, with the goal of meeting up with him in the lucid dream/astral realm that night – not something that is all that easy to do at will, by the way.
After a long day, I composed myself for sleep, hoping to find Teshko in a dimension where we could communicate with each other in a more direct, non-5-senses way – and maybe I could find out what he knew about my missing ax.
Unfortunately that night, I was carried off to a frequent persistent dream scenario wherein I have only semi-control. Yes, even after all my years of lucid dreaming training, I am still subject to experiencing dreams of some non-control – or I should say – dreams which I have been partially stripped of my ego-volition.
On this night I was carried off to what I call the “City of the Silver Domes” –this is a strange place, where I am sort of forced to join a team of men in gray suits, and whose job, as far as I can figure out, is to conduct some kind of census like survey, but then also attempt to sell bizarre products to people --- but I won’t get into any of this now.
Suffice it to say that night my desire to contact Teshko in the astral-dream world were thwarted because I had to “put in my time” with the Men in Gray Suits in the City of the Silver Domes. I have to wear a Gray suit, too. It's pretty irritating.
BTW, my duties with the Gray Suits are also exhausting, and I tend to wake up from this long dream situation feeling like I have slept poorly during the night. So the next day, I got to work at my keyboard as usual, but at about 10 a.m., I was so tired I decided to lie down on the couch for a brief nap.
On the couch, I composed myself for rest by doing a Zen breathing exercise, and then let myself drift into nappy time – when suddenly I !!! “Awoke” !!! -- but I wasn’t awake!
I was dreaming!
I knew I was dreaming because there sitting in front of me in my living room was “The Dirty Gold Falcon.”
The Dirty Gold Falcon is Teshko.
In the dream-astral world, Teshko takes the form of a bird that is a kind of hybrid between raven and falcon – but mostly falcon. His feathers are gold, but streaked or highlighted with black. He looks like a gold flacon that has been messing around in a coal mine – which is why I call him the Dirty Gold Falcon.
In the “real” world, Teshko is a crow-raven hybrid, but in the dream-astral realm, he is a raven-falcon hybrid.
I bolted upright. I said: “Teshko! Well met! What’s going on around here? What’s bothering you – and who stole my ax! And what was that black shadow? Do you know!”
The Dirty Gold Falcon flew out the window – well, in this dream version of my home, there was no real window, at least no window pane -- anyway, Teshko flew out, and I got up and “jumped” out of the window as well – moving in that strange flying-walking way that one sometimes travels in a realm that is only slightly dimensionally shifted from my normal, waking-physical environment.
Teshko sored impressively around my yard, and just for fun of it, swooped down to goose one of my “dream chickens” (in real life I keep chickens who are free range) –
Note: I suppose I should not really say “dream chickens” because my chickens in this dream state looked like they normally do in “real life”, so maybe they were just “analog chickens” – but let’s not digress.
Teshko spiraled impressively in the air, then closed his wings and soared down like a bullet – he was headed straight for the “Four Source Doorways.”
In “real” life, the Four Source Doorways are some ordinary very old broken down grain bins a ways from my yard, and here they are pictured here:
The Four Source Doorways
In the dream-astral realm, however, these old grain bins become something exceedingly strange – I call them the Four Source Doorways because that is what MOMMY told me they are called. From left to right in the picture, these are, according to MOMMY:
Source Doorway 1
Source Doorway 2
Source Doorway Broken
Source Doorway Flavored
Perhaps someday I will dig out the transcript in which MOMMY gives me the complete rundown and explanation of what the Source Doorways are – I’ll only say for now, they are very, very, very WEIRD, I don’t go out of my way to mess around with them!
The few times I went through one of other of the Source Doorways – well, it was super-mondo-bizzaro times for all, believe you me!!! Generally, I avoid the Source Doorways.
Even I have a limit for strangeness.
You will notice an interesting attribute of the Four Source Doorways in the picture. They are guarded by nearly identical oak trees on either side. MOMMY also has some significant comments on this as well. The oaks which guard the Four Source Doorways are not just there for window dressing
An interesting aside about these two oaks – the one on the left is an extremely prolific producer of acorns whereas the one on the right, as far as I know, does not produce acorns. Positive and negative anodes? Yin and Yang? A balance of opposite powers? Who knows.
Anyway, I was chagrined to see that Teshko, the Dirty Gold Falcon, was heading straight for the Doorways, and in particular, he was flying toward Source Doorway Broken. (Ugh! The worst one!)
When I arrived and stood a few yards across from the Doorways, Teshko plummeted through the missing roof of Source Door Broken way and came blazing out the front missing door an instant later – he was coming straight toward me.
As if in slow motion, Teshko executed a muscular air-break by fanning out his wings, and as he did so, he extended forward a talon and rammed it right into my chest.
I fell backwards, but immediately got up again. Teshko had jazzed me in some way. I felt scintillating electricity – I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to do, but it was obvious that Teshko wanted me to investigate Source Doorway Broken --- AHHHHHH!!! – the last thing I wanted to do!
Source Doorways 1 and 2 are bad enough!
Source Doorway Broken sucks!
I’ve have never even dared enter Source Doorway Flavored!!!!
However, curiosity is a powerful force, and I simply had to find out what happened to my ax, and all this certainly had something to do with it. But then I thought: “I don’t necessarily have to enter Source Doorway Broken! I’ll just approach carefully and peek inside the door!”
This is what I did. A crept forward like a jungle soldier expecting to get ambushed at any moment. I reached the opening of Source Doorway Broken and peered inside. What immediately captured my attention was the circular floor. It was rotating, with a slight wobble.
All across the surface of the floor was some kind of broken-lined code, moving slowly back and forth – little bronze-colored lines or bands moving from side to side, sometimes merging with each other, sometimes elongating – they were functioning and pulsating – they reminded me in a way of bacteria as seen through a microscope, but that’s only an impression.
As I extended my consciousness toward the rotating coded circular floor of Source Doorway Broken – there was immediate blow-back – that is, I felt a “consciousness force” stream back toward me. The blow back force encountered the electrical “consciousness sphere” of my mind – and this caused a very dramatic psychic disassembling or scrambling of my rational thought process.
For a very long time over my years of lucid dream practice, I have confronted this peculiar “scrambling force.” It’s a situation in which normal rational, linear, A = A or A = B = C type thinking is totally thwarted or compromised.
What ensues is a kind of nonsensical thought process that seems to be totally unimaginable “thought gibberish.”
Perhaps many of you have experienced this scrambling of rational-linear thought in the dream state as well. I have no doubt that many of you have.
The important thing is to retain some kind of basic recognition that this is happening, even though you cannot think normally or rationally when it is happening – because your rational, linear thought is being scrambled.
But what I have been able to determine over the years as that when you get this kind of consciousness scrambling “blow back” is that total nonsense has not ensued – but rather, what this indicates is that your mind has confronted a multi-dimensional thought environment, and that you have actually shifted into a multi-dimensional thought mode.
Think of it this way: You’re playing chess on a regular flat, two-dimensional board, and suddenly, the chess board adds several layers and become a 3-dimensional chess board – the kind of chess set Mr. Spock always played on in the old Star Trek TV shows.
Or think of it this way: You are working the flat two-dimensional Ouija board, and all of a sudden the Ouija board expands into a cube, and the letters and symbols on your Ouija board become suspended within a cube of three-dimensional space, adding great dimension to the complexity and amount of communication you can receive.
(In fact, as I will show you later, this is the nature of Dr. 58’s Hassas Grid!)
But now imagine that the chess set or the Ouija board expands to even more dimensions. It goes from 2-D to 3-D – and then even more exotic dimensions expand it to even greater levels of complexity!
Try to imagine what that is like! It’s a major frontal-lobe twister baby!
The most natural reaction for we human beings who are accustomed to operating in linear-thought, 3-D world (with a foggy notion of the 4th dimension of time spectrally mixed in) is to simply flee from what we are experiencing as “nonsense.”
However, if you stick with it, master your fear and retain your sense of calm and stability – and look directly into the consciousness dimensional shift – you can learn to operate at least to some degree in a higher dimensional environment.
You have to be utterly accepting of novelty. You have to be a like a palm tree in a hurricane, bending with the wind, not breaking. You cannot allow yourself to have the fear of the loss of ego. Your ego will bend, not break.
On this day, standing before the rotating code patterns on the floor of Source Doorway Broken, I moved backward and away from the consciousness blow back.
I took my mind away for an instant, and felt the return of normal-mode thought. I looked up into the sky – Teshko the Dirty Gold Falcon screeched and circled. It was inspiration seeing him up there.
I felt love for my beautiful friend Teshko, which spurred my creativity. I felt a notion, perhaps an insight.
I thrust my dream hand up toward the sky and commanded the Energy Bar Tool.
“ !!!!!!!!!!!!!! ENERGY BAR !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! “
The Energy Bar Tool came forth !
! I grasped the Energy Bar Tool in my hand !
In my consciousness, I invoked that “feeling” of “universal imbalance” created by the theft of my ax.
I felt a surge as the Energy Bar Tool accepted the “negative charge” and began to resonate in an incompleteness cycle.
The Energy Bar grew hungry!
It radiated the imperfection of the imbalance!
The Energy Bar Tool leveraged the frustration of the imbalance and incompleteness cycle to charge itself further …
…. to power up ….
….to ache for an encounter with a balancing force!
The Energy Bar Tool was sizzling hot for stasis!
With supreme concentration, I moved again toward Source Doorway Broken. I kept my “eyes” closed.
I shielded my mind from the radiation of higher dimensional thought blow back coming from the wobbly rotating floor of Source Doorway Broken.
Moving as if blind, feeling my way forward, I gained the gaping door of Source Doorway Broken.
I stuck my “head” inside, raised the Energy Bar Tool high above my head, and for the briefest micro-instant – I opened my eyes.
In the same motion with the opening of my eyes, I thrust the Energy Bar Tool onto the rotating floor of code.
A “THWUMP” of concussion energy blew me back on my ass!
I looked up to see the circular floor of Source Door Broken rising up (thankfully, Source Doorway Broken has no roof) – and the circle and code was spinning end over end!
As the speed of the spinning increased – I knew that I had accomplished what I wanted to!
I had increased the dimensional representation of the codes on the floor with spin!
The spinning codes revealed themselves – they coalesced -- to become the “form” of AX!
The Dirty Gold Falcon screeched with delight across the sky!
The circular floor of Source Doorway Broken was so rapid it became as a glowing sphere.
In the center of the sphere was suspended the ax!
Overcome with exuberance, I felt I needed to share this incredible event with someone!
I tilted my head to the sky. I shouted and pointed: “T-E-E-E-S-H-K-O!!! HA! HA! HA! HA! THE AX!!!!!!”
“IT’S THE AX T-E-E-E-S-H-K-O!!!!!!!!!!! HA! HA! HA! HA!
Teshko performed a magnificent role, like a blazing F-15, and answered:
Teshko soared higher. A shaft of sunlight flashed gold from his wings.
The flash of gold expanded exponentially; erupting like a hydrogen bomb!
When the shock wave of the golden explosion hit me – I was blasted awake on my couch!
I sprang to my feet. I looked around my living room in disoriented confusion.
A minute later I was clear headed enough to run outside – to find the ax lying on the grass just where it had been before it had disappeared!
I picked up the ax – and immediately noticed something strange – it wasn’t the same ax that had gone missing, not exactly anyway.
This ax (more well used and altered from the original) has been on a multi-dimensional journey
This ax had a broader head. The ax that went missing had a more narrow configuration – it was actually more of a splitting wedge.
But I decided not to quibble. The imbalance had been restored. I had “my” ax back – retrieved from whatever inter-dimensional journey it had been on.
When my wife came home that evening, I proudly displayed the ax.
“Well, it’s back,” I told her, beaming.
She said: “That doesn’t look like the same ax.”
I said: “Whatever, it’s an ax.”
So everyone’s subsequent theories to explain the mysterious disappearance and return of “the magic ax” went like this:
Someone came over and took the ax. Then, for some reason, they decided to return a slightly different ax a couple of days later – perhaps overcome with guilt for stealing the original ax.
I told my wife and others: “But that’s a ridiculous theory! Why would someone come into our yard – leaving no tracks in the snow – steal an ax – and then bring back another ax two days later?”
And they said to me: “They just felt guilty! Do you have a better theory? What do you think happened to the ax?”
I said, “Well …