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The Darkness of The Deep

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Belief: Finding Your Own Path 5


Not A Rockstar

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The question of God. Is there a god? If there is, what is god like? This may be second, as questions go, only to the question of why are we here? Most of us have wondered these things to some degree in our life. What is it all about?

Religion is man's effort to answer this sort of question. If you look at the array of religions out there and choose one that feels like a good fit for you, it should be alright, as long as you remember what it is and what it is not. It is man's effort that creates it. Many will claim some great enlightenment or revelation which proves their religion is the only true one, but here is the bottom line. 

You never lose your responsibility to grow, to learn, to seek and discern truth for yourself. I do not care what religion you think you are, when a person exalts the religion over the Divine, when he focusses more on the doctrine than the living spiritual relationship within him, he is wrong. If there is not that living relationship within, why are you even still there? This is where a few Moslems went wrong when they went overboard and thought Allah wanted them to murder thousands in His name. This is where the Catholic Church went wrong when they afflicted the Inquisition on Europe. It is what allows some people to think it is alright to murder abortionists for the "glory of God". This is error and most religions go through it. They grow, they learn and correct and often end up better on the other side, but it is ugly, much like our own journeys and lives can get at times.

How I have seen God over my life has ranged from Pentecostal zeal to agnosticism, bordering nearly on atheism. We live in a world that challenges us and our ideas and beliefs constantly. Not only the unbelievers out there challenge you but also fellow believers do. Trust me, I know of two priests who I have spoken at length with over the years who would say I am a Believer. The rest probably would not. They have their assumptions they know what Vodou is and what I believe and how wrong I am and there is no way in their rule book I can possibly be on anything but a Highway to Hell. This used to trouble me to a degree until I finally grew up enough spiritually to let it be alright. They need their filters. I have some of my own. My concern is one - does God know me? Are we chill? Yes? Then I am doing just fine, thanks. 

I say all this to open the next part of this quick series on how to find where you are in the big picture if you are looking. The basic question you have to answer is about God. Some say this even is more basic than that and comes down to how you see the whole matter of Creation.

My Pentecostal Grandparents had the most amazing and elaborate tales of Creation in seven days and the world God destroyed before (accounts for the dinos and fossil record neatly), and it all ended in a literal Heaven with gates of Pearl and streets of gold. Everything was explained and set. I was ok with that for a long time until I got to wondering if it was a day for each of the first six, then what was going on now with a seventh day which had not ended yet.... or had it and the story had stopped? Where did that leave us and where was God now? That was when the beatings and abuse really set in and rather cemented my adamancy to ask questions and trust that the answers were out there.

I share my story to illustrate that your own ideas may shift and change and questions arise and this should not scare you. If you persist in seeking for truth, you will find your way through and the very journey you have been on will teach you how to express and explain to someone else if they ever turn to you and ask "what do you think this means?" The experiences on your journey are what help to light your way as you go onward in life. Early on I had this naïve seeming idea that all religions saw God from a slightly different direction and angle, and this was alright because God was so big that none of us was able to see the whole anyway. Decades later, I remember that and think it may have been truer than not, after all.

In my paradigm, I see that we are each of us born with the unique capacity to contemplate our self and consider life and the god question. Capacity equates to me as a potential. Potential equals something to fulfill if we choose to. Free will rules, and some use that to decide there is no god at all as a result of the filters they embrace. Others conclude that there is and so build their lives by taking on filters which reveal this for them in the format they more easily relate to. 

Example? Alright. I see the repeating patterns in creation and have concluded there is a plan, this did not all happen by marvelous coincidence upon coincidence upon lucky chance. A plan infers planner(s). So, I believe in Creation, as a process, there was a process and plan which unfolded through epochs, some longer than others, and the notion of a literal week is simply metaphor. Creative design, intelligent design, this is how I think everything I see happened. That is one of my filters. What does not agree gets filtered out as a truth for me as a result. That is how filters work and we all have them. I like science but to believe all of this was a grand coincidence and happenstance takes more faith than I can muster. I don't believe in that many coincidences. 

So, with this filter, then one can assume I think there is a planner who worked the plan, and that probably is something "god" would have a hand in. 

You will create your own filters as you search to determine what you believe today. They will overlay each other and in the end be how you view the god question and how you answer it. It is alright if we do not have identical results. The journey is not over yet and we all have different things we came to do here. 

To the degree any religion you espouse supports your journey and search and grows your understanding of the god within us all, it is a good thing and the good purpose for religions. On my journey, my choice to go into Vodou so seriously came at a point when I was nearly an atheist and it revealed God to me in a way I had never imagined before and brought me back to belief again. This is why I no longer run a House or do public events, I still claim it and respect it for what it gave to me. I honor my vows and remain clergy for it, but, it never did demand I spread a faith or sell it. Those Lwa just expect me to honor my roots and respect my Ancestors and be honorable before God. I can do that. I no longer need a house or altars, all of that is inside my heart and soul; and I don't need the trappings anymore. I don't need the gris gris or oils or items to do wanga. All of that was just physical things seeking to teach me about the Will, our own divine power of will. I can throw wanga with a simple decision of my mind, now. I pretty much have decided not to do that at all, but, I have done it. I leave the option open as some things and some folks respond to nothing else, at their level. 

True religion is this, carrying within YOU the clear image of how YOU see god/dess/the Divine/Creation and the love of the divinity out there echoing in you as you. Carrying the honor of it as your own revelation, and being true to the rules and calls it places upon you as a result of your own choices. This is a fancy way of saying being the best person you know how to be, and loving your Creator with all you have inside of you to do that with. Seeking to grow and be good and be more like you perceive the love from the divine. 

I write about this before I close with a post about religions because this comes first, it has to, or nearly so. Religion without the love of the divine within you is like an empty shoebox, a clanging bell, a dissonant wind chime in the breeze - it is empty and not good for much to you or anyone else. Run into mature believers in any faith path and it is the peace, the love, the quiet and patience which marks them. Not their ranks or place in life here, but the place they hold as they walk with a quiet peace through the mean streets. 

That is where you can spot god/dess.

I write to serve.

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