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talking to myself

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I will never fully understand God’s grace

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I will never fully understand God’s grace


“When you say to Me, ‘Beloved Jesus I give you my entire life,’ do you realize that at the same time I’ve given you more, since even what you are giving Me is what I’ve given you? Admit that everything you have comes from Me. It’s all a gift from Me, not to display My power, not chosen at random, but by My most attentive love—chosen especially for you, My children—for your path in life, in order to help you to reach the goal that is yours. Bossis, Gabrielle.


 He and I (Kindle Locations 2321-2324).
Pauline Books and Media. Kindle Edition.


I have come to the conclusion that I will never understand God’s grace.  For it is given in such abundance to all who seek, that it can be overlooked, or not taken seriously.  There is much in life that does not make sense.  There is much tragedy in life, and we are asked to traverse a path that is often chaotic, filled with pain, loss, and confusion, and yes, terrible injustice.  The death process, is in itself, as part of the human journey, a source of fear and anxiety.

Yet, “God-With-Us” travels with us, is incarnate in each human being, undergoing the whole drama of each life.  God’s love does not allow withdrawal from experiencing the human journey, nor can God hate, or have contempt for anyone.  Our Father’s love is based on total freedom, for God is love.  It is not something understandable, but as I get older I have at times experienced it…..it is like nothing else. 

Because of God’s love, He sees into our hearts deeply, knowing that there are those who ‘freely’ reject that grace and love.  How that happens I do not know.  I think this final rejection of God’s mercy, and love, as shown in Christ Jesus, happens in a place that is very seldom seen by any one human being. 

I can see only the surface of my own inner world, yet God sees me to my depths, and in that I am hopeful.  Freedom is a small seed, and as we move ever deeper into our life’s journey, that seed will grow either towards life or death.  God’s love and mercy is not in question, it is our (my) love and openness to God that is the problem.  In the end, when I stand before Jesus, the judgment will be the Trinity accepting my choice, either for or against a loving relationship with the Infinite…..true justice is unknown in this world, but before God, all is known and accepted by both parties.  No one is forced away from God, we choose in the depths of our hearts.

How that happens I have no idea.  Yet I pray for the salvation of all, and mostly for mine, for as the saying goes:  “One day at a time sweet Jesus, one day at a time”.  To sin is to do the unloving action, which flows from our thoughts, which are often based on fear, anxiety, as well as a heavy load of pain.  It is grace that calls us to have faith and hope and gives us the power to love in ways that without this grace, we would find impossible. It is a life long journey, or as St. Paul describes it, a race.—Br.MD



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