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Love

LightAngel

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If people are afraid to have their heart broken, then they will also be afraid of love, they will reject it (I'm talking about all kinds of love here).

However, all experiences in life are here to help us grow and evolve. And growth on a personal and individual level is more important than growth on any other external level in life, material or not.

I know many people who have been hurt so many times that they have closed their hearts.

What happens, unfortunately in many cases, is that those same people simultaneously substitute that love that they long for with external distractions which will for the most part be material, but they can also not be material, at least not directly. 

Just some examples of material substitutes would be obsession with one's career or what kind of house or car one owns etc. 

Some examples, which I think are much more pervasive but nonetheless actually less conspicuous and even trendy - to such an extent that they are even considered "normal" - are attention-seeking, thrill-seeking behavior, obsessive preoccupation with what other people think and/or do, in some cases nothing short of full blown narcissism. 

Overall, in many cases - conditions that I would say are nothing else than mental diseases which have affected so many people worldwide that the global consensus is that these conditions are normal only because "everybody else is like that". 

However, I believe that it's a sickness in our society all the same, and I think it could be the end of us.

I am quite certain that it "will" be the end of us unless something changes.

So how can we stop this sickness?!

This is not some kind of change that will occur with some kind of global movement or therapy or media outcry or anything of the sort.

This is a change that happens and needs to happen individually and "within" every individual.

 

 

 



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Goddess of the Mist

Posted

I don't think there is a way to stop it, LightAngel. What we can do is work on ourselves and hope to project some good energies out there ~ which you do! :)

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LightAngel

Posted

On 23.4.2019 at 5:02 AM, Goddess of the Mist said:

 What we can do is work on ourselves and hope to project some good energies out there ~ which you do! :)

 

So do you! :P 

Since all we can do is inspire each other, then it's important that we also understand that everything starts with ourselves.

The burden of change lies on our shoulders alone. 

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Carlos Allende

Posted

I like to read posts that make really bold, imaginative statements. And I hate to be the bringer of a 'but' -- _but_ ...my experience of love, be it romantic or platonic, is that it's a mythical thing, all about intimacy, and wish-fulfillment. I don't see how that translates to solving any kind of societal problem. Jeremy Corbyn went to Glastonbury for the loved-up vibe, but did he use it to make a speech on tangible political policy --which is what the country so desperately needs? Nope. It was just a big sing along. And think on overpopulation. Love should solve that one over night, but it never does = a man and woman should be so engrossed in each other's personalities that they don't need to have kids to live vicariously through ...but it never quite works out that way, does it? 

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LightAngel

Posted

On 28.4.2019 at 7:05 PM, Carlos Allende said:

 _but_ ...my experience of love

 

The fact that love consists of many different emotions which are intrinsically part of it (such as trust, friendship, intimacy, companionship among many others) but can also exist alone without being "linguistically" defined as love - makes love complex, not mythical.

Society is also a mixture of many different things and is equally complex, but it is also not mythical. The fact that ideas, or better to say ideals, that underlie the idea of society may very well be far from reality - that generates a discrepancy between what society is and what it should be - but that still doesn't make society mythical - it just makes it even more complex.

But you seem to be missing my point in addition to trivializing it to what sounds to me as quite a pessimistic conclusion. 875.gif

The substitution of love in one's life with external things is just one example. I've chosen the idea of love because it is the most profound one. The union between two people who truly love each other requires that those people are truly honest with each other.

I have more to say, but no more time today. So I will continue another day. :)

 

 

 

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LightAngel

Posted

People can only be honest with themselves and each other if they think for themselves.

My example with love, if you think about it just a little bit harder, demonstrates an existential problem on a global level with much more dire consequences:

That the biggest problem of society is that people do not think (the paradox here is that the greatest danger FOR society are people who do think). However, let's put the apocalypse on hold for now and move to my second point:

That substituting any internal value with an external one is a very bad idea.

The irony is that - this is the idea of society - that external values should be internalized by the individual - whether it's a sense of a moral center - or the new trend in smartphones.

What is notable here - is that the VALUES themselves, at least that is my impression, are changing towards those that warrant a society that is less and less likely to think. 

And while the mode in which society operates, with the intended internalization of its values, has not really changed through history - it becomes exceedingly easy to manipulate the individuals who do not think by implementing societal values, which they internalize, that diminish the opportunity for people to think in the first place. 

 

But perhaps I should unravel my own paradox into an optimistic ending, instead of ending it with a statement that could easily be interpreted as - "a society comprised of individuals who think would cease to be purposeful"

What if we did have a society comprised of people who think for themselves? People who don't jump at all the latest trends. People who can sit still for 2 seconds without having to buy something they don't need.

Perhaps it would be an intelligent society - of people who are strong enough to stand alone - but CHOOSE to work together for a greater good.

That would be a welcome change and one of gigantic and historic proportions.

 

You may call it bold and imaginative, but there is another way of describing things that are bold and imaginative and that is - visionary. But in this case, it's not a vision that's wishful thinking. It's a vision that NEEDS to become reality if anything good is to come out of the human race.

 

And perhaps then we would have a society where the notion of love would not be a notion of some elusive mythical beast, easily set aside and scoffed at - but instead - the true way of life. :yes:

 

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The Wistman

Posted

Excellent points overall, Light Angel.  The problem with our current global situation wrt humanity is that the megaphones aren't willing to change their tune - which is calculated and devised with much thinking and cunning - so that changing the way most of us think, and view love, is truly daunting.

Humanity does think, and think and think, but the majority do not think critically, especially about themselves.  Instead, we seem to be tribalized in our thinking, and conformity is emphasized and rewarded....materially mostly, but also emotionally via inclusion for the conformists, shunning and bullying for the questioners. Thought conformity and tribalism are the weapons of control, the tools of programming, and the shaping method that debases the individual self.  Where I live it's all about teams, like sports, for all of societies' actions and messages.  This emphasizes emotional thinking, inevitably negative emotional thinking, especially as applied to other 'teams.'  Most people fear and detest the emotion of loneliness, so they sacrifice (unquestioningly) their independent reasoning for team thinking, so that they don't feel alone.  As you point out, the danger to us all is the thinking of the powerful, who rationally think about how this divided, team thinking world can be manipulated to keep them in power.  And it works like a charm.  It takes courage to break free from this cage, and an awareness of the dynamic of the cage.

As for love, or Love, here the problem is that people mostly think of it in terms of intimate, relationship love...and familial relationship love.  But these are often mutable and sometimes strangling and hurtful.  People can become disgusted with the idea of this love, once they've been victimized enough by it.  Or, if they have a successful love relationship, it is often seen as a 'prize', as having won something in our overly competitive world.  Status and comparison drives this internalization, as you so rightly put it.

As high functioning, sensate beings we, like other species, are gifted with a capacity for love; it relies on a communion with the environment and an innate acceptance of being just a tiny functioning part of it.  Put the question: What will you miss from this world after you're gone?  The list soon becomes enormous.  If we look at the stars on a clear night or watch the full moon rise and contemplate this same question, big love rises inside us along with the moon.  We innately love the natural world, the big life we're part of, our little lives, our special limitations and differences. 

I advise unstructured, quiet contemplation as a daily tool to regenerate our experience of big love.  But the global megaphones won't let that message be reinforced, not when there's new shoes to convince people they need to be happy, or a religion to follow unquestioningly and 'love' with money and obedience.  Or some 'other' to hate.  It must be resisted; the entire planet is now in danger.

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LightAngel

Posted (edited)

On 20.5.2019 at 4:02 PM, The Wistman said:

Excellent points overall, Light Angel.  The problem with our current global situation wrt humanity is that the megaphones aren't willing to change their tune - which is calculated and devised with much thinking and cunning - so that changing the way most of us think, and view love, is truly daunting.

 

I really like the way you've dissected tribalism and conformity and I think it adds further weight to my previous post, thank you. :)

However, there is one thing here that I wouldn't say I disagree with, but I would call it a slight shift in emphasis:

I think the "megaphones" work both ways. From the megaphone side - you've got the agenda that serves a certain purpose - marketing, consumer-culture, trends, whatever else it may be and to whatever end.
From the other side - the "listener" side - you've got the diminished ability (not necessarily correlated to "capacity") of the individuals to actually "make up their own mind" about what they are hearing.

And I think the latter is of greater importance by far. 

This is because there will always be someone, or some group, with some agenda, trying to gain some kind of advantage over people or a specific group of people. This has not changed throughout human history. 

It is people's ability to "filter out the crap", to think as an individual, the courage to stand alone with their opinions, the insight and the self-awareness - that will determine how, where and to what end the "message from the megaphone" lands.

This is every person's OWN responsibility. Not everything can be delegated and distributed to the all-pervasive and seemingly always elusive "sinister powers" that hold that megaphone. I see this trend of blame-shifting just as a way of dodging individual responsibility.

The existence of these external factors does not relinquish the individual of his own responsibility.

 

Edited by LightAngel
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Not A Rockstar

Posted

I like your mind, LA :)  This topic, though, deserves a book, more than a blog post. It is huge and the deepest need of the world today, IMO. We need a lot of healing to even wake up to what real love is. SO much can be said about this...my God.

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Desertrat56

Posted

On 4/28/2019 at 11:05 AM, Carlos Allende said:

I like to read posts that make really bold, imaginative statements. And I hate to be the bringer of a 'but' -- _but_ ...my experience of love, be it romantic or platonic, is that it's a mythical thing, all about intimacy, and wish-fulfillment. I don't see how that translates to solving any kind of societal problem. Jeremy Corbyn went to Glastonbury for the loved-up vibe, but did he use it to make a speech on tangible political policy --which is what the country so desperately needs? Nope. It was just a big sing along. And think on overpopulation. Love should solve that one over night, but it never does = a man and woman should be so engrossed in each other's personalities that they don't need to have kids to live vicariously through ...but it never quite works out that way, does it? 

Nonsense, love has nothing to do with politics or over population and a love between two people that excludes all else is a sick love. Even on a desert island you could not have that exclusive a love.  There is a lot of love shared in a group of people singing together.  Love is feeling, not thinking.  Your attempt at short circuiting your emotions shows in most of your posts.  The problem is when you try to short circuit your emotions, everything becomes emotional and there is no rational thought.

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LightAngel

Posted

On 10.6.2019 at 9:24 AM, Not A Rockstar said:

I like your mind, LA :)  This topic, though, deserves a book, more than a blog post. It is huge and the deepest need of the world today, IMO. We need a lot of healing to even wake up to what real love is. SO much can be said about this...my God.

 

The biggest change can only happen individually and "within" every individual! ;)

A book sound like a good idea, but only as an inspiration!

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LegionsRUs

Posted

Always let our light shine . Even while the darkness may not comprehend !

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'Walt' E. Kurtz

Posted

That's deep. It's not like you walk around contemplating about this even if you had a life full of  lemons.

If you get burnt you tend to get more cautious which is understandable, it does not mean that it's harder for you to show love and affection, you do that to the people you trust and hold dear.

others you show respect but it might take some time before you can put your trust in them. Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.

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LightAngel

Posted

On 23.6.2019 at 4:02 PM, LegionsRUs said:

Always let our light shine . Even while the darkness may not comprehend !

 

5185a4e0a646eecfb67e55382c1c5ee6.gif

 

:P

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LightAngel

Posted

On 23.6.2019 at 4:49 PM, Impedancer said:

 

others you show respect but it might take some time before you can put your trust in them.

 

Hmm.

That should be common sense no matter what!

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Habitat

Posted

On 20/06/2019 at 8:44 PM, LightAngel said:

 

9155684.jpg?309

 

 

Never near the curtains !

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LightAngel

Posted

1 minute ago, Habitat said:

Never near the curtains !

 

True :rofl:

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Habitat

Posted

Love is nothing more than the acknowledgement, in word and deed, that the lives and concerns of others are as important as our own. Which should be obvious, but something we are only partly able to implement, under the constraints imposed by our egos.

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LightAngel

Posted

8 minutes ago, Habitat said:

Love is nothing more than the acknowledgement, in word and deed, that the lives and concerns of others are as important as our own. Which should be obvious, but something we are only partly able to implement, under the constraints imposed by our egos.

 

Then let go of your ego!

If your ego creates problems for you then you need to let go of it!

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Habitat

Posted

Without an ego, we are "brown bread", it is an indispensable part of establishing and maintaining ourselves in the world. And it is the most subtle thing in existence, in convincing us it is right ! It is a long battle to have it take less of a forward position in our thinking, but the fact remains, it is at our service, not at the service of the greater reality, that of the unity and equivalence of all being, which we can occasionally glimpse, albeit only temporarily, before the ego steps in to bring us back to it's "reality".

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LightAngel

Posted

Isn't that how true love starts!?

I mean....

When we let go of our ego then true love starts?!

Right?! 

I think so. :wub:

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Habitat

Posted

It can do, but most of us only go on limited excursions, and most noticeably with children, but there is also ego involved there, as people often see their children as an extension of themselves. It is a fact that any relationship that has expectation figuring prominently, such as a marriage, is more problematic than a relationship this is less conditional, like that of parent/child, where people will put up with much more disappointment before abandoning the relationship. Mature, loving relationships do acknowledge that the concerns of the other have equal validity to our own. I don't know how many old couples I've heard attribute their marital "success" to "give and take". Selfishness will kill any relationship that might have held hopes for the parties, of being a loving one.

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Manwon Lender

Posted

To find a Queen without King who plays guitar and cries and sings (La da da) To ride a White Horse on the foot steps of dawn, trying to find a women whose never, ever been born. Standing on a hill in my mountain of dreams telling myself it's not hard hard hard as it seems. LOVE

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