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A Rude Person Doesn't Make You Angry



Years ago, I was reading a self help book about anger management.

The author of the book, a psychotherapist, wrote that when someone is being what you perceive as being rude to you, the person doesn't make you angry.  Instead, the author stated that you make yourself angry when the individual is perceived by you as being rude to you.

I'm not so sure about that.

What's your opinion about this?  Do you think the author is right or wrong?


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spartan max2


Uhhh yes and no.

We feel anger when we feel a boundary of ours has been crossed.

Then it's up to us to decide if the boundaries we have are reasonable or unreasonable. 

Sometimes people can precieve others as being ride when they aren't if they have unreasonable boundaries.

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Ummm... well if that were the case then 1st off we'd all be angry cuz theres a lot of rude people in the world but some can shrug it off easily and there are different levels of rudeness and anger....

and 2nd off I wouldn't make myself anger... that's silly, had the person not sad what they did to upset me I simply wouldn't be angry then would I.


I understand I hold the power to hang on to it and let it fesster or shrug it off and go on with my day but there are those times that, no I dont have a choice but to be angry cuz it was past the point of any kind of decent to be able to shrug it off and go on.

Some people are so hurtful and spiteful and revengeful and vindictive forcing you to hold your own and that kind of stupidity makes me angry.

Just the other day a women was screaming at me on the phone whom I've never met and it was beyond my control to control my reaction to it, I held my own and was still very professional under the circumstanses but I have NEVER been that mad just by someone words, my EVERY nerve was shaking, it took me 3 hrs. to get over it and I had to try really really hard...

I was absolutely fine, minding my own business, happy as could be beforehand, then out of the blue the words and hatred out of that womans mouth set me off, I didn't set myself off.

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