As the days are rolling by, every holiday, every family gathering, everything I did as part of a couple bring me to remembrance of my late husband.   But I am reminded each time that although I feel that small stab of pain, it has lessened.   It's not as raw as it was in the beginning and I am finding that when I feel that it reminds me that I am still alive.   With each pain, each memory, I am growing as a person.   I have an inner strength I never knew I possessed until losing my husband.   Do I still have bad days?   Of course I do.  There are some days I question my very existence.   

But it has made me slow down, take stock of what is really important in my life.   I depend heavily on my belief system, and find that focusing on that is helping greatly.   Meditating on Christ's teachings calms me down and centers me.   I also have family and friends.   Friends who I also lean on heavily, and they listen when things are good and give me advice when things are not so good.  They are my rock and inspire me every day.  

Each day I challenge myself to be a better person than I was the day before.   I realize my faults and work to correct them.   I find a reason to smile every day, even if it's just hearing a bird singing early in the morning.   I am truly thankful for each day and whatever it brings, I will work through it and figure out what I can learn from it.  So I thank all my friends, online and in real life who are there for me, will let me talk and will simply listen to what I have to say.   I am thankful for them each and every day.   They help put a smile on my face because through all of this, life is beautiful.