Our Children and the Paranormal

[beckyboo]

I think this will be a great topic to all parents that have a clue that their chidren may be dealing with paranormal events.

I my self have been dealing with diffrent paranormal events my whole life. My daughter is 12 and for the Last 2 years she has been coming to me asking me why she gets this feeling that there is someone are something that follows her on occasion. I have never told her about my own paranormal events. But I am wondering if its time to sit her down and have the discussion. Where to start with this is the question of the day. I have started watching Paranormal programs on television with her and I print out websites of children with paranormal gifts for her to read. The more she reads and watches the more interested she gets. Now I have not asked her as of yet if she has actually seen anything all I know is that she feels a presence. Our children are our most precious gifts. We try to shelter them for as long as we can in complete paternal instinct. When is it time to have that big paranormal chat with our kids? Do we tell them our stories or let them just tell us theirs?

Sugestions everyone might have would be greatly appreciated!!

Becky

[Neognosis]

Well, I always wondered how some of you could be so utterly convinced you have magic powers that don't exist, and now I see how it starts. Apparently the same way religious devotion starts.

PS- everyone gets a feeling that they are being followed and sometimes feels a "presence."

[PJ6177]

Well, I always wondered how some of you could be so utterly convinced you have magic powers that don't exist, and now I see how it starts. Apparently the same way religious devotion starts.

PS- everyone gets a feeling that they are being followed and sometimes feels a "presence."

Sounds like someone is jealous.....

My daughter has told me from the time she started talking that she has seen things. I myself have had some experiences, but nothing major or worth mentioning. But, I felt that it was best to talk to her about it so she wouldn't be scared. She was being visited by an Uncle as well as Grandparents. She was able to describe these people that had passed on to me- and she had never seen them before. They had passed on before my daughter was even thought of. (She also has not seen pictures of these people.) Now that she knows who they are, she would rather strike up a conversation with them then be scared and hide. But, my daughter was born with quite a few vision disabilities, so I'm guessing her other senses have taken over- that's why she's a little more sensitive than say myself.

[Libranaster]

Well its probably a bit late by the time they are 12 but I actually am pretty impressed with the way my family deals with the whole paranormal events thing. Since I can remember I have had paranormal events happen to me the most promonent from my childhood being the two angels I saw standing by my bed.

When I would come to them right from the start no one ever doubted what I said happened and the usual responce I would get was "its ok they can't hurt you" or "I would not let them hurt you" from my family. They never made me feel like I was making stuff up or crazy which was nice because as I got older I felt I could talk to my family about anything.

Also when my poor brother was followed around by a little boy spirit for quite some time my mother never made him feel crazy or like he was lieing she just told him to ask the little boy to pass over.

I grew up around my family openly discussing and exploring theories and possibilities about their own paranormal experiences. Some of them could be explained in the end but others are still baffeling to us all.

My mum is still convinced that her grandmother dropped a xmas pudding on her head .

My nan and pop both say they saw their daughter come to them and wave goodbye after she died because she forgot to say good bye that day.

It can be a bit wierd in my family some of the rituals and things they have are almost pagan but they are a Church of England family. I am a Spiritualist not a Anglican anymore but there is no wonder I changed growing up around what I have and the people I have. Its amazing really the little things they do and the way they talk its like the dead are still part of our lives all the time. They never leave our thoughts and candels are always lit for them on special days or they have special xmas decorations in memory of them. I am very greatful for this approach because it makes the holidays easier without our loved ones and sometimes I feel like I know relatives I never met.

I believe the best approach is to make these things a normal part of life for your child because they seem to adjust better I am doing the same thing with my daughter and son and they aren't even afraid of the dark and sometimes my daughter talks to them or if they are scarey she comes and gets me and we do our Go Away game .

The existance of the paranormal is something we can not hide from our children so it is best to teach them how to deal with it from the beginning.

[Radian]

I think you have to be very careful. The last thing you wanna do is plant something suggestive- Or expand on such a thing when there are other explanations for it. IMO, you should let your daughter come to you and have her confirm these things, rather than the other way around. Give other explanations for the time being, but be understanding toward her, open, encourage her to come to you. However, you confirm nothing at this time. Eventually, I think you can start to confirm any of her experiences if they seem persistent enough to do so..jmo.

hope that makes sense.

[Libranaster]

I think you have to be very careful. The last thing you wanna do is plant something suggestive- Or expand on such a thing when there are other explanations for it. IMO, you should let your daughter come to you and have her confirm these things, rather than the other way around. Give other explanations for the time being, but be understanding toward her, open, encourage her to come to you. However, you confirm nothing at this time. Eventually, I think you can start to confirm any of her experiences if they seem persistent enough to do so..jmo.

hope that makes sense.

You have a point there for sure. Still information doesn't hurt but I do agree no outside explanation should be implanted, my family used to wait for me to suggest it was a ghost not plant the idea in my head and they would always openly look for explainable explanations for what happend to them before pinning it to the paranormal.

[Alienated Being]

Being children, they most likely have one of two things - a.) an overactive imagination or b.) a potential psychological issue. There is always that small possibility that they are experiencing a paranormal phenomenon, but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't have the mindset of "better safe than sorry". If it were my child, I would ask him/her "Okay, well... what exactly does it feel like when this person 'follows' you?". After that, I would allow this issue to escalate a little further... then see where it goes. If strange things started occurring around the household, then I would start freaking out (such as objects being thrown, scratches, hideous odor, etc). Just allow this to escalate a little further to see where it takes you - who knows? Maybe it is an entity following your child... in which case, I would say that it doesn't necessarily indicate good intentions.

[John from Lowell]

Where to start with this is the question of the day. I have started watching Paranormal programs on television with her and I print out websites of children with paranormal gifts for her to read. The more she reads and watches the more interested she gets. Now I have not asked her as of yet if she has actually seen anything all I know is that she feels a presence. Our children are our most precious gifts. We try to shelter them for as long as we can in complete paternal instinct. When is it time to have that big paranormal chat with our kids? Do we tell them our stories or let them just tell us theirs?

Sugestions everyone might have would be greatly appreciated!!

Becky

Yes, where to start is a good question. I would suggest that you encourage conversations in reguard to her experiences. I would relate your experiences that align with her concerns. Use your intuition as to when to introduce or expand on a perception of your own. When you do, be sure to present it objectively.

I realize every parent has a desire to protect their children. The thing to keep in mind is that when a child asks a question of any kind, they are old enough to understand your best answer.

John

Edited September 20, 2008 by John A Spera

[Marby]

I grew up in a haunted house. I am sure that there was a time when we did not talk about it openly, but it's hard for me to remember any more because even when I was little and reported something that could not be explained, we made it a game of sorts to find the rational explanation. If there was no apparent rational explanation, I was never made to feel as though I were crazy or making things up, and we just talked about the spooky experience and let it go. No one ever made much of it outside of attempts to debunk it as supernatural, and if it couldn't be done, it couldn't be done. I feel that it fostered a realistic approach to the matter where we did not blame every noise or thing we saw on a ghost until we could show that it wasn't one. It really helped calm any fears we might have had too, to see the adults handle situations calmly.

So really, that's all I can offer.

[beckyboo]

Well, I always wondered how some of you could be so utterly convinced you have magic powers that don't exist, and now I see how it starts. Apparently the same way religious devotion starts.

PS- everyone gets a feeling that they are being followed and sometimes feels a "presence."

Having been through it myself. I have or will never have any intention in planting the thought in her head that she has a paranormal gift. I do however educate her that there are other children out there that might for some reason or another be experienceing the same things she has been. It is up to her to tell me what she feels and its my responsibility as a parent to listen in a non judgemental fashion. I would never plant it in her mind that she has magical powers because feeling presences are clearly not ( Magical Powers) and as far as religous devotion in concerned tell that to the Southern Baptist church we attened on sundays. Religous devotion is a choice, Paranormal events in our lives just happen.

Thanx

For the Slam out

Becky

[beckyboo]

Yes, where to start is a good question. I would suggest that you encourage conversations in reguard to her experiences. I would relate your experiences that align with her concerns. Use your intuition as to when to introduce or expand on a perception of your own. When you do, be sure to present it objectively.

I realize every parent has a desire to protect their children. The thing to keep in mind is that when a child asks a question of any kind, they are old enough to understand your best answer.

John

John

your feed back was not only helpful but encouraging. When she asks me about things I will only share my experiences with her that relate to her own!!! Great Call!!!

Thanx

Becky

[LadyHay]

Well, I always wondered how some of you could be so utterly convinced you have magic powers that don't exist, and now I see how it starts. Apparently the same way religious devotion starts.

PS- everyone gets a feeling that they are being followed and sometimes feels a "presence."

Neognosis, I understand your need to be totally disbelieving, but you can't make a blanket statement such as "magic powers that don't exist". Its just not conducive to the conversation. This is not a belief vs. non belief thread. This is a thread about how to deal with kids who may be experiencing something "odd". Paranormal? Who knows.

People have experiences that they can't expect others to believe. However, since you haven't experienced what Becky and her daughter possibly have, you can't belittle their experience. This lady is asking for help and I don't find your comment at all helpful, but mocking.

To Becky, great thread. My way to deal with this kind of stuff depends on the age of the child. My two older kids often have questions and I will start a lot of my questions with, "Some people believe..." and I also sometimes add what I believe if they ask. I feel it is important that they form their own opinion as it is no less important than mine as to what is happening, if it is yet unexplained. For the two younger ones, I haven't had to deal with that much yet, only there was a time when 3 out of 4 kids (the last wasn't born yet) were experiencing night time odd events of the exact same nature. I did ask questions then, provided some "protection". For one it was a bowl of salt water that we used to make a bit of ceremony about - it helped "suck up" his bad dreams. For another it was cinnamon water that she sprayed when she felt scared. For another one, the eldest, we smudge the house regularly.

[primordial]

My daughter is 10 years old and she watches most of the Paranormal shows on the television. She has been watching them since the time she had seen, in the corner of her eye, of an doll floating. It fell in when she had looked it. I had asked her which doll it was and it was the doll that we had found in a old abandoned hospital. It had sent shivers up my neck when she told me of this. She doesn’t like the doll anymore of course, and I am now keeping it my closet with my other paraphernalia. I should use my Ouija board and this doll….

Do I believe her story? I want to because this is the not the 1st time she had experienced something extraordinary. She heard foot steps walking from the kitchen to her room one morning, everything was locked, and she was six years old at the time. I posted an thread about it way back. There was an energy that had been left over by a “presence” and everything about that morning had a unpleasant feeling. It was gone in when Angela awakened me but the feeling of someone in the house remained inside and it was “old”..not in age but ancient…hard to explain.

The doll was in a pile of debris with it’s legs sticking out in when we have found it. The poor thing was full of dust and broken in the 2 eyes. Angela loved it and she used to have it sitting on her antique dresser given by her great grandmother. I had always thought it was an creepy doll and it appears to be old…older than me, that’s for sure. Is Angela’s story is true? No, bec we are natural born liars. Kids with high imaginations will make things up. It is sad actually entirely, because I do blame somewhat in Society and it’s religions, the Parents and myself in teachings. I like to see a child born without the Supernatural and a God..

These “energies” that everyone is talking about in the forums is good but some are unclear. Most never seen or experienced an Ghost/Haunting. Some might think about the energy like being in an Mosh-pit of ppl, the sinister dances of planetary bodies/objects, prayer, or someone is mad or depressed.( I like to be happy at best and I try not to feed off of other ppl when they are negative…even when its family or work..). Tho, there is this other “energy” that I cannot explain - It’s like having the doll beside me n typing about it… because something had happened strangely to it told by an child seeing it. It’s too bad that kids can’t type their Ghostly stories. I am sure their stories that will dumbfound our minds..

Anyway, Neognosis, your last statement is what I have basically told Angela. Why I had posted here. Well, I am going back to read physics of the soul by amit Goswami..

[isis-999]

As a born witch i happen to think your moving in the wrong direction with this, Children do not need to think they have power nor do they need to pratice anything, I'm not closed minded i just know as a Mother of 4 and witch i would never allow my kids to think at 12 they have the power of anything...I know your going to disagree with me cause you think your doing the right thing, But a 12year old is to young to under what this is really all about, And i new at 4 i was different and my mother made remark's about it, But it was not untill i was 25 she told me she new what i was, we never spoke of such thing's and to quote a old say's''Becareful what you ask for""...If your messing with the unknown then YOU maybe letting thing's into your house and she's paying the price for it....

[LadyHay]

As a born witch i happen to think your moving in the wrong direction with this, Children do not need to think they have power nor do they need to pratice anything, I'm not closed minded i just know as a Mother of 4 and witch i would never allow my kids to think at 12 they have the power of anything...I know your going to disagree with me cause you think your doing the right thing, But a 12year old is to young to under what this is really all about, And i new at 4 i was different and my mother made remark's about it, But it was not untill i was 25 she told me she new what i was, we never spoke of such thing's and to quote a old say's''Becareful what you ask for""...If your messing with the unknown then YOU maybe letting thing's into your house and she's paying the price for it....

But SOME power is ok, isn't it? Like the power to be able to protect themselves, as a very basic thing. I don't mean tell them to call the four and cast a circle of protection or anything. I only mean that they should be able to do a personal non ceremonial protection so that they don't have to call for us every time they feel scared of the dark or what have you.

I should clarify that I never told my kids that there was a ghost or even acknowledged such possibilities. (I didn't know what we were dealing with either) I only armed them with what they could do if they ever felt like that again. I felt that it was acknowledging their feelings but not ascertaining anything was to be afraid of, and merely providing a method to help themselves to feel safe.

I do agree that somethings are not meant for kids to fully understand at young ages or to be introduced into as they are vulnerable. Someone like myself doesn't have enough knowledge of what kind of stuff is out there, so I certainly wouldn't want my kids to dabble in certain activities.

[beckyboo]

Neognosis, I understand your need to be totally disbelieving, but you can't make a blanket statement such as "magic powers that don't exist". Its just not conducive to the conversation. This is not a belief vs. non belief thread. This is a thread about how to deal with kids who may be experiencing something "odd". Paranormal? Who knows.

People have experiences that they can't expect others to believe. However, since you haven't experienced what Becky and her daughter possibly have, you can't belittle their experience. This lady is asking for help and I don't find your comment at all helpful, but mocking.

To Becky, great thread. My way to deal with this kind of stuff depends on the age of the child. My two older kids often have questions and I will start a lot of my questions with, "Some people believe..." and I also sometimes add what I believe if they ask. I feel it is important that they form their own opinion as it is no less important than mine as to what is happening, if it is yet unexplained. For the two younger ones, I haven't had to deal with that much yet, only there was a time when 3 out of 4 kids (the last wasn't born yet) were experiencing night time odd events of the exact same nature. I did ask questions then, provided some "protection". For one it was a bowl of salt water that we used to make a bit of ceremony about - it helped "suck up" his bad dreams. For another it was cinnamon water that she sprayed when she felt scared. For another one, the eldest, we smudge the house regularly.

Lady Hay

Well thanx for the back up and feed back on this!! As of Yet my daughter has not been scared or had any feeling of dread. That was the first thing I asked her. Her reply simply was " Mom its Just feelings I get that I may not be alone and it happens at random times" . I can reassure you that if it ever progresses from that I will take your steller advice obout protection!!

Thanx

Becky

Edited September 21, 2008 by beckyboo

[beckyboo]

As a born witch i happen to think your moving in the wrong direction with this, Children do not need to think they have power nor do they need to pratice anything, I'm not closed minded i just know as a Mother of 4 and witch i would never allow my kids to think at 12 they have the power of anything...I know your going to disagree with me cause you think your doing the right thing, But a 12year old is to young to under what this is really all about, And i new at 4 i was different and my mother made remark's about it, But it was not untill i was 25 she told me she new what i was, we never spoke of such thing's and to quote a old say's''Becareful what you ask for""...If your messing with the unknown then YOU maybe letting thing's into your house and she's paying the price for it....

I think you have a Valid point and I do not encourage her or plant the seed that she has powers in her head. Thats the last thing I would ever want her to be saddled with as a child. Though as the questions persists from her and I would never want her to ever think that I didnt believe her. Or her growing up thinking she is crazy because of the presences she feels. Thats why I believe its good for us to talk about whats going on with her. I believe a child with a question should not be dismissed!!!

Beck

[dsm_luck]

I think this will be a great topic to all parents that have a clue that their chidren may be dealing with paranormal events.

I my self have been dealing with diffrent paranormal events my whole life. My daughter is 12 and for the Last 2 years she has been coming to me asking me why she gets this feeling that there is someone are something that follows her on occasion. I have never told her about my own paranormal events. But I am wondering if its time to sit her down and have the discussion. Where to start with this is the question of the day. I have started watching Paranormal programs on television with her and I print out websites of children with paranormal gifts for her to read. The more she reads and watches the more interested she gets. Now I have not asked her as of yet if she has actually seen anything all I know is that she feels a presence. Our children are our most precious gifts. We try to shelter them for as long as we can in complete paternal instinct. When is it time to have that big paranormal chat with our kids? Do we tell them our stories or let them just tell us theirs?

Sugestions everyone might have would be greatly appreciated!!

Becky

I was a child who was subjected to intense beliefs in the paranormal through my parents religious beliefs. I was told demons and evil spirits roamed the earth trying to corrupt me. During my early teens I ran into some mental health issues and was eventually told I might be dealing with demons trying to possess me. I sat through an exorcism. All of this killed my self esteem, and my feeling of security during that young age. During that time I on a number of occasions believed I had paranormal experiences. As I got older my religious beliefs started to wane, and with that so did the "experiences". It is absolutely critical that you don't pollute her mind with paranormal ideas right now. You will walking a fine line by subjecting her to it at such an important time. I'm not saying that all kids that are subjected to it will have the experiences like I did, but growing up is hard enough without the added confusion of a pseudo- science. Seriously if people came back from the dead to visit, wouldn't it be a well documented experience? Its a morose thought that thankfully has no scientific backing.

If magical powers really exist why not have them tested by James Randi and receive 1 million dollars? http://www.randi.org/joom/challenge-info.html

Its very simple prove ANYTHING having to do with the paranormal exists and you will receive the money. I sure as hell would do that if I had magic powers or was a witch.

Edited September 21, 2008 by dsm_luck

[The Skeptic Eric Raven]

Worst thing you a parent could do is ruin the social development of their child by somehow making them think they have paranormal powers. What a great way to make your kids real popular.

[someoldlady]

Worst thing you a parent could do is ruin the social development of their child by somehow making them think they have paranormal powers. What a great way to make your kids real popular.

It is one thing to tell your kid that they have paranormal powers, it is quite another to let them tell you what they are experiencing without making them feel like they are crazy. The impression I get from the OP is she is merely trying to do the latter.

[dsm_luck]

It is one thing to tell your kid that they have paranormal powers, it is quite another to let them tell you what they are experiencing without making them feel like they are crazy. The impression I get from the OP is she is merely trying to do the latter.

Belief that unknown entities or powers are the cause of what a child sees is neither healthy, or helpful. There is a reason why a child is seeing or experiencing these things and most are due to mental issues that can be addressed in the right way. I know I was one of these children. Please don't send your children down this dark path.

[Marby]

I agree with someoldlady. I don't get the impression that the OP is trying to convince her kid that she has special powers. I also feel that there is more harm in telling a child that what they are seeing or hearing is not real unless there is good reason to believe that the child has mental issues of some sort, in which case, the problem is an entirely different one. I know that the openness about such things in my family made me analyze this sort of thing with a critical eye because I was taught that every little bump in the night was not necessarily a ghost, but hey, if it was, it was. Children are not stupid, and as long as you aren't terrorizing them, and are honest and willing to listen, they aren't going to fancy themselves the second coming of Samantha Stevens.

[Bish815]

Becky ,

This is very interesting to me since my daughter is only 2 & she doesn't have great verbal skills just yet. But I can tell she senses the unseen because she's at that stage where she ask "What's that"? & she's done that when there's nothing I can see. I'm curious of what I should tell her. I don't want to turn her in to the town nut case. I know my parents always denied there was ghost but now that I'm older I know that my mom also seen them before. But I guess they did it to protect me.

[beckyboo]

Worst thing you a parent could do is ruin the social development of their child by somehow making them think they have paranormal powers. What a great way to make your kids real popular.

Ok first of all the last 2 replies to this thread were dead on. In no way would I ever plant the seed in my daughter that she had some kind of paranormal powers. She has come to me asking questions! Dealing with paranormal myself my whole life as a child I learned how to deal with it. With absolutely no help from my parents in fear they might think I was crazy. I just would never want my daughter to go through the same things that I had went through feeling so alone in all this made me withdraw on several occasions just wishing it away. All this as an adult drew me deeper into science! I now work in the forensic science field wich I love but the things I see have never went away. Up untill recently I have looked for scientific explanations to what I had been dealing with my whole life. Im 38 and it has taken me this long to figure out there are no real scientific explanations that appply to me or what I deal with. So all that reading research and quest for answers I believe was a big calosole waist of time. So have I explored the possibility that my child might have other things going on with her that may cause this? Well absolutley I have!! She seems to have none she's a pretty well rounded kid Church,school, friends and social calendar that I seem to not be able to keep up with. I do tell her not to be forthcoming with what she is going through to people outside our family because they might not quite understand!!

So I can reasure you there is no popularity contest going on here. Why I started this thread was because as a child I had to deal with theses things utterly alone and since I did. I dont quiet no how to deal with it, with my child and wanted feed back from others on how to do so. Sugestions and answers on this thread have been great and I have collectively utilized alot of the feed back. I know there are other parents out there that are going through the same thing with there children and that helps. Childeren should lead a well rounded life knowing the people they love most will not dismiss them or what they have questions about.

All feed back on this thread has lead to the positive, even the negative feed back because it sparks a little more topic in all of us!!!

Thanx

Becky

[John from Lowell]

Ok first of all the last 2 replies to this thread were dead on. In no way would I ever plant the seed in my daughter that she had some kind of paranormal powers. She has come to me asking questions! Dealing with paranormal myself my whole life as a child I learned how to deal with it. With absolutely no help from my parents in fear they might think I was crazy. I just would never want my daughter to go through the same things that I had went through feeling so alone in all this made me withdraw on several occasions just wishing it away. All this as an adult drew me deeper into science! I now work in the forensic science field wich I love but the things I see have never went away. Up untill recently I have looked for scientific explanations to what I had been dealing with my whole life. Im 38 and it has taken me this long to figure out there are no real scientific explanations that appply to me or what I deal with. So all that reading research and quest for answers I believe was a big calosole waist of time.

These things are never really a waste of time. The value they have provided is insight into our known body of awareness, which is weak at best. I would suggest research of a different nature. The information that can be found in reguard to your experiences is quite extensive. I would not know where to begin it is so vast and extensive.

Your heart knows that there are better answers. If you could share some of your inclinations on this subject, I may be able to suggest a direction for additional research. You can PM me or elaborate in any way that fits your comfort level.

So have I explored the possibility that my child might have other things going on with her that may cause this? Well absolutley I have!! She seems to have none she's a pretty well rounded kid Church,school, friends and social calendar that I seem to not be able to keep up with. I do tell her not to be forthcoming with what she is going through to people outside our family because they might not quite understand!!

So I can reasure you there is no popularity contest going on here. Why I started this thread was because as a child I had to deal with theses things utterly alone and since I did. I dont quiet no how to deal with it, with my child and wanted feed back from others on how to do so. Sugestions and answers on this thread have been great and I have collectively utilized alot of the feed back. I know there are other parents out there that are going through the same thing with there children and that helps. Childeren should lead a well rounded life knowing the people they love most will not dismiss them or what they have questions about.

All feed back on this thread has lead to the positive, even the negative feed back because it sparks a little more topic in all of us!!!

Thanx

Becky

There are parents dealing with children which have a wide range of gifts and issues of concern. I like to think that a child will select their parents to assist them with their life path. So your research into your experience may well assist you with your child in ways that are simple and logical.

I would strongly suggest stepping away from conventional wisdom because it has not served your needs. Be calm and confident that your inner guidance system will support your desires.

John