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Showing content with the highest reputation since 09/16/2021 in Status Updates

  1. 15 points
    Happy autumnal equinox!
  2. 15 points
    Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth. Then it's a soap opera.
  3. 15 points
    this girl I'm talking to texted me and asked if something made her look fat I meant to say, 'nooooo!' but it autocorrected to, 'mooooooo!' SEND HELP
  4. 13 points
    I’m going to my grand daughters volleyball tournament tomorrow that’s about a hour from here. I don’t know how these kids do it. They have a hour after school to study and do homework and then a 2 plus hour practice. When they get home they still need to finish homework. She is taking all honors courses and is exhausted by the end of the day…
  5. 11 points
    this is a pretty fun idea for a Halloween porch
  6. 11 points
    Something i just learned.... Gary numan is 13 days older than gary oldman.
  7. 11 points
    someone finally cleaned up a small mess in our office at work because I've been too lazy to do it yet I've been told all my life that I can't solve my problems by ignoring them WRONG!
  8. 11 points
    I arrived early at the restaurant last night. “Do you mind waiting for a bit?”, the manager asked. “Not at all” I replied. “Good, take these drinks to table 9″
  9. 9 points
    The forest kept shrinking but the trees kept voting for the axe. For the axe was clever and convinced them that since his handle was wood, he was one of them
  10. 9 points
  11. 9 points
    @acute I know it is early over there, but you might want to cover up bud. I dont think my eyes can take it anymore
  12. 8 points
  13. 8 points
    The view of Greenwich across the Thames.
  14. 8 points
    If you really love cats check out this website, did you know that Cats can bounce! https://cat-bounce.com/
  15. 8 points
    What we call a lift, the Americans call an elevator. I guess we were just raised differently.
  16. 7 points
    Crosby Stills & Nash, live, 1983, Wooden Ships
  17. 7 points
  18. 7 points
    I’ve literally been partying all day. And, I had a nap. Win.
  19. 7 points
    One of my favourite places, Greenwich Park.
  20. 6 points
  21. 6 points
    Who would you say is the "most famous theropod"? Tyrannosaurus Rex? Or the common Chicken?
  22. 6 points
    low hanging ashened skies slowly and silently cry acrid tears; tears meant to dissolve spring's new life and summer's shade until all that is left are barren bones of towering giants and the decayed aftermath trampled underfoot.
  23. 6 points
    Dear Court TV, Even with a Three-Photon Excited Fluorescence Microscope, it would be impossible to detect my interest in the R. Kelly trial. — acute.
  24. 6 points
    this whole time I thought the moon was earth's satellite... boy was i ever wrong. Here my friends, is what the moon really is.
  25. 6 points
  26. 5 points
    All day, it's felt like I've been punched in the right kidney and ribcage. I think I slept last night with my chest facing to the left and my knees to the right.
  27. 5 points
    So the local burger place (actually local all over the state with 2 shops in Texas and one in Arizona) has a call center when you call to order a pick up. No one knows where the call center is and my daughter is bothered because she is sure it is not in the state. It is not a national chain so it should be providing jobs for people in our state. I told her to call the local television station and ask them if they would find out about the call center. I can't even imagine a local business using a call center for orders.
  28. 5 points
    Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the wait....?
  29. 5 points
    Robert Durst has been found guilty on all charges in California. I'd never heard of him before the trial, but what a horrible man!
  30. 5 points
    When it rains why does it always seem like people put on their "I don't know where I'm going, what I'm doing and can't read the speed limit" hats on?
  31. 5 points
    Well I float in liquid gardens, and Arizona new red sands Jimi
  32. 4 points
    Prince Andrew. Like the impossible-to-touch villain from a grindhouse film, ala Sin City, Female Prisoner Scorpion, etc, and possibly the only way he'll be taken down is if Danny Trejo flies through his roof in a paraglider made of knives.
  33. 4 points
    What is Aeropostale? And why have I been getting Emails from it for two weeks now?
  34. 4 points
  35. 4 points
    Stanley Unwin explaining, in clear layman's terms, the benefits of Pirelli P3 radial tyres. https://youtu.be/tWOTpeBVML8
  36. 4 points
    Well..... I am delighted with my DVD box set of 'M. Night ShyamaLamaDingDong' movies. It's all mint condition, for £6.50ish! The Village, Unbreakable, Signs, and The Sixth Sense.
  37. 4 points
    May contain egg, milk, sesame seeds. Produced in a factory that also handles wheat, barley, peanuts, almonds, pecans, fish, soybeans, hair, dandruff, saliva, nasal excretions, urine, fingernail fragments and nail polish.
  38. 3 points
    time for either peppermint or lemon/ginger tea.
  39. 3 points
    This slightly rude clip from The Office (UK) makes me laugh every time. https://youtu.be/xIn84fZ_kxI?t=12
  40. 3 points
    What's on my mind? My ex whom I met when this song was aired for the first time:
  41. 3 points
  42. 3 points
    Ok. So..I had Opera and the Vivaldi browsers and they were quite good but they also dumped tons of files into my cache too so right now I am using Waterfox..apparently it is a fork of FireFox which can use extensions of both FireFox and Chrome. It works just as well and it automatically imported my bookmarks from FireFox..really nice. I just wish it had imported my passwords too but it's all good.
  43. 2 points
    @diddyman68 https://youtu.be/kX85QqzrXO0
  44. 2 points
    Watching the Akron arson trial on Court TV, I was horrified by the sequestration instructions from the judge. Members of the jury are not allowed to bring alcohol with them! What if you're a chronic alkie who thinks clearer after 17 cans of Scrumpy Jack, for example? These crazy rules could lead to a miscarriage of justice, in a death penalty case!
  45. 1 point
    Some days I get a weird feeling that it's the 1950's and I'm stuck in an old drive in movie. You know, something like It Hitchhiked From Outer Space, or Night of the Schlepping Slime Monster. When I spot the tree branches moving in the breeze outside my window I begin to wonder if a reanimated prehistoric beast is going to break in and feast on my well marbled body. But then, I look over and see my rats stretching and yawning hello, and the happy little centipedes scurrying to and fro on the floor, and I let out a sigh of relief, because they have let me know that everything is going to be AOK. Ah, my babies.
  46. 1 point
    Been one of those morning where I can not legally get away with doing what I'd love to do to some people. Grr.
  47. 1 point
    Flairck: Variaties op een dame:
  48. 0 points
    I'm not sure why my thread was moved, but I think it was in the correct section.