HOW TO KEEP A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

[Mr-X]

HOW TO KEEP A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

1) At lunch time, sit in your parked car with

sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2) Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3) Insist that your e mail address is: Xena-Warrior-Princess@OCDSB.edu.on.ca

mailto:Xena-Warrior-Princess@OCDSB.edu.on.ca> or

Elvis-the-King@OCDSB.edu.on.ca

mailto:Elvis-the-King@OCDSB.edu.on.ca>

4) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

5) Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN."

6) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once

everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

7) In the memo field of all your cheques , write " FOR SEXUAL FAVORS".

8) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."

9) Don't use any punctuation

10) As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

11) Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.

12) Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

13) Sing along at the opera.

14) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

15) Put mosquito netting around your work area.

16) Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.

17) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.

18)Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard.

19) When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won!", "I Won!" "3rd time this week!!!"

20) When leaving the zoo, start running towards

the parking lot, yelling "Run for your lives, they're loose!"

21) Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy,

we are going to have to let one of you go.

remember this:

22) life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted all the time and have the time of your life.

[Halo_Jones]

:s2 :s2 :s2

I read all of those with a big smile on my face. ;D

I will be trying out a few of those for definate

The Xena Warrior Princess one is right up my street :s8

Another one to keep you sane is, while out driving, beep and wave at strangers it's so funy watching them wave back then look again to see if they recognise you. :s02

[Loonboy]

[blue]

It sounds just like me!!

I especially liked numbers 19 and 20.

How about: talk to yourself but speak in different accents.

[/blue]

[Kira]

Nice one again X yet another to print for work, :s03 :s03