A Write Clanger!

[Halo_Jones]

Double meanings and misprints are a nightmare for every newspaper editor. It's all too easy to say one thing and mean another.And it's not only newspapers that get it wrong........

1.We exchange everything--Bicycles, washing machines,ect ect. Bring your wife and get the deal of your life.

Sign in shop window

2.Teeth extracted with the greatest of pains.

Dentists advertisment

3.A Council of Action has been set up. This decided yesterday not to take any immediate action.

Buckinghamshire paper

4.Fashion says that bikinis are out, and full length swimsuits are in. But British girls are revolting.

The People

5.Deryk stood watching her, his splendid specimen of English manhood in his white flannels, his tennis racket in his strong brown hands.

Story in a church paper

6.22 March: For Sale Slightly used farm wench in good condition. Very handy. Phone ******.A Cartright.

29 March: Correction. Due to an unfortunate error, Mr Cartright's ad last week was not clear. He has an excellent WINCH for sale. We trust this will put an end to jokesters who have called Mr Cartwright and greatly bothered his housekeeper, Mrs Hargreaves who loves with him.

9 April: NOTICE! My WINCH is not for sale. I put a sledgehammer to it.Don't bother calling ****** - I had the phone taken out. I am NOT carring on with Mrs Hargreaves. She mearly LIVES with me here.

A Cartwright.

Connecticut paper quoted in Readers Digest

7.THIS IS THE GATE OF HEAVEN ENTER YE ALL BY THIS DOOR.

(This door is kept locked because of the draught)

Seen at a Cumberland church

8.Women hurt while cooking her husbands breakfast in a horrible manner.

Headline in Texas paper

9.During the past few days three bicycles have been stolen from Exeter streets. The police consider that a bicycle thief is at work.

Western Morning News

10.By an unfortunate typographical error we were made to say last week that the retiring Mr -  was a member of the defective branch of the police force. Of course this should of read : The detective branch of the police farce.

New Zealand Paper

11.Nothing brightens up the garden more than primrose pants.

Weekly paper ;D

[Saru]

:s2

9. During the past few days three bicycles have been stolen from Exeter streets. The police consider that a bicycle thief is at work.

Western Morning News

I particularly liked that one.  :s2

[albaqwerty]

i liked all of them but No. 10 really hit the old funny bone

:s2 :s2

[Kira]

9.During the past few days three bicycles have been stolen from Exeter streets. The police consider that a bicycle thief is at work.

Western Morning News

Blimey does this makes us sound thick down here  or what? :s2 :s2 :s2

[Ronin6th]

:s2 Muahahaha very funny!  :s2

I liked 1 and 9, but some of them are still incomprehensible  for my poor English!

The trend in France last year was to tell funny stories about blonds  (if some of them are reading this, please take it easy! )

"How many blonds do you need to bake a chocolate cake?

You need 200 of them:

-One to make the mixture...

-And 199 to peel the M&M's..."

:'( Well, will I be banned for it? :'(

[SpaceyKC]

   I don't know Ronin,  how many of us (blondes) would it take to ban you?   :s2

   Being a born blonde,  I'm used to the jokes by now!

    BTW,  I liked the one about the winch/wench - however you spell it!  the more it was explained, the deeper it got!!