Karlis Posted January 23, 2009 #1 Share Posted January 23, 2009 It's Australia Day on the 26th of January, and around this time of the year it's common to receive chain-letters similar to this one. If you are not from Down Under, don't be surprised if you don't understand some of the local lingo. So, if you miss the meaning of a few phrases, just ask any fair dinkum Aussie bloke or sheila. Here's to a Happy Australia Day, folks, Karlis You know you're Australian if.... You know the meaning of 'girt' You believe that stubbies can either be worn or drunk You think it is normal to have a Prime Minister called Kevin You waddle when you walk due to the 53 expired petrol discount vouchers stuffed in your wallet or purse You've made a bong out of your garden hose rather than use it for something illegal such as watering the garden When you hear that an American 'roots for his team' you wonder how often and with whom You understand that the phrase 'a group of women wearing black thongs' refers to footwear and may be less alluring than it sounds You pronounce Melbourne as 'Mel-bin' You pronounce Penrith as 'Pen-riff' You believe the 'L' in the word ' Australia ' is optional You can translate: 'Dazza and Shazza played Acca Dacca on the way to Maccas' You believe it makes perfect sense for a nation to decorate its highways with large fibreglass bananas, prawns and sheep You call your best friend 'a total b******' but someone you really, truly despise is just 'a bit of a b******' You think 'Woolloomooloo' is a perfectly reasonable name for a place You believe it makes sense for a country to have a $1 coin that's twice as big as its $2 coin You understand that 'Wagga Wagga' can be abbreviated to 'Wagga' but 'Woy Woy' can't be called 'Woy' You believe that cooked-down axlegrease makes a good breakfast spread You believe all famous Kiwis are actually Australian, until they stuff up, at which point they again become Kiwis You know, whatever the tourist books say, that no one says 'cobber' You know that certain words must, by law, be shouted out during any rendition of the Angels' song 'Am I Ever Gonna See Your Face Again' You believe, as an article of faith, that the confectionary known as the Wagon Wheel has become smaller with every passing year You still don't get why the 'Labor' in 'Australian Labor Party' is not spelt with a 'u' You wear ugg boots outside the house You believe that the more you shorten someone's name the more you like them Whatever your linguistic skills, you find yourself able to order takeaway fluently in every Asian language You understand that 'excuse me' can sound rude, while 'scuse me' is alway polite You know what it's like to swallow a fly, on occasions via your nose You understand that 'you' has a plural and that it's 'youse' You know it's not summer until the steering wheel is too hot to handle Your biggest family argument over the summer concerned the rules of beach cricket You shake your head in horror when companies try to market what they call 'Anzac cookies' You still think of Kylie as 'that girl off Neighbours' When returning home from overseas, you expect to be brutally strip-searched by Customs - just in case you're trying to sneak in fruit You believe the phrase 'smart casual' refers to a pair of black tracky-daks, suitably laundered You understand that all train timetables are works of fiction When working at a bar, you understand male customers will feel the need to offer an excuse whenever they order low-alcohol beer You get choked up with emotion by the first verse of the national anthem and then have trouble remembering the second You find yourself ignorant of nearly all the facts deemed essential in the government's new test for migrants. You will immediately forward this list to other Australians, here and overseas, realising that only they will understand!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Silver Thong Posted January 23, 2009 #2 Share Posted January 23, 2009 Australia, what a neat country, hope I get to see it some day and experience what I can only think of as paradise, it's minus 30 here right now with the wind and it totaly sucks the big one. Karlis your list has me thinking Canadians are a bit more ummmmm normal and thats boring. How hard is it to get a green card there and if any aussie chic wants a free mail order husband drop me a line lol. Now this one I totaly get lol "You believe that stubbies can either be worn or drunk" Ok maybe not, how does one wear a stubby? I remember a stuby as a beer bottle lol Have a great monday and happy Australia day to all you nuts over there, wait a second that means a day off work.......... no fair LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karlis Posted January 23, 2009 Author #3 Share Posted January 23, 2009 ... it's minus 30 here right now with the wind and it totaly sucks the big one. ***Place sounds real cool ... How hard is it to get a green card there ... ***You get one when you sign up as an environmentalist. ... and if any aussie chic wants a free mail order husband drop me a line lol. ***Yes, this isn't a bad place to roost. ... "You believe that stubbies can either be worn or drunk" Ok maybe not, how does one wear a stubby? I remember a stuby as a beer bottle lol ***You can’t wear just one stubby – you need a pair; and a stubby in this weather is cool. Have a great monday and happy Australia day to all you nuts over there, wait a second that means a day off work.......... no fair LOL ***Thanks ... will be looking forward to a stubby or two with our roast lamb dinner, Karlis Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Silver Thong Posted January 23, 2009 #4 Share Posted January 23, 2009 Oh man lamb, I havn't had lamb in years, now your rubbing it in Think monday might be a sick day, just to celebrate Australian day yoohoo lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barnacle Battlefront Posted January 23, 2009 #5 Share Posted January 23, 2009 None of those apply to me I will always see myself as a Brit Although... "You've made a bong out of your garden hose rather than use it for something illegal such as watering the garden" does kinda apply to me. I have to keep my hose locked away, because I found out that pieces (the kind of length you would need for such a thing) goes missing every weekend if I don't! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevin7557 Posted January 23, 2009 #6 Share Posted January 23, 2009 You think it is normal to have a Prime Minister called Kevin Yep perfectly normal no questions asked. LOL this reminds me of the simpsons episode when Bart offends Australia and the guy say he's going to complain to his represenitive and he yells to guy next door. LOL Wish I could find a clip. Here are some from the episode though. Foundation and Knife scene Toilets and Soil Enjoy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
little_dreamer Posted January 24, 2009 #7 Share Posted January 24, 2009 "You believe it makes perfect sense for a nation to decorate its highways with large fibreglass bananas, prawns and sheep" Got any pictures of these? "You know what it's like to swallow a fly, on occasions via your nose" This doesn't sound like much fun. Are these midge flys? "You understand that 'you' has a plural and that it's 'youse'" "You's guys" is acceptable English in parts of the Northeastern U.S. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luca-RoseElsie-Raemom1921 Posted January 24, 2009 #8 Share Posted January 24, 2009 The flies are huge at times, cane toads can be used instead of golf balls in Queensland (cane toads are so gross). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barnacle Battlefront Posted January 24, 2009 #9 Share Posted January 24, 2009 "You believe it makes perfect sense for a nation to decorate its highways with large fibreglass bananas, prawns and sheep" Got any pictures of these? A list of all of Australias 'Big Things' Click Me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
black dahlia 83 Posted January 24, 2009 #10 Share Posted January 24, 2009 Lmao, the certain words to be added to the Angels, Am I ever Gonna see your face again. 'Am I ever gonna see your face again?' 'NO WAY , GET FU**ED, FU** OFF!' Best ever pub song! Oh and Stubbies, are a pair of shorts. Mostly worn by truckers and tradies. They're fairly short, not uncommen to get a glimpse of jocks between the legs. ( nice mental picture huh?) Happy Australya day Fellow Aussies! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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