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Still Waters

When Garden Gnomes Attack

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booNyzarC

Alright so apparently this is some big joke to most everyone...but...what's the real story behind these creatures? Wasn't there somekind of footage filmed last year by some young people in Argentina? Also, previous to the said footage, there had/have been numerous reports of sightings. I have heard only a few stories regarding gnomes. There's also footage of a small "Gnome-like" creature dissapearing into a wall while a few kids play..ofcourse they scream and run out.

Now, I have no prove ofcourse(as these things go..)but...at my aunt's house, which my be a portal for the unexplained(half joking), there were sightings. Small creatures running around on two feet dissapearing into walls. There was one extremely chilling experience I had during the day time no less....

When I was about 7 years old(give or take one), I slept over at my aunts house from time to time. On this day I woke up on the couch at around 9am..so anyway everyone was asleep I walked around for a bit..inside the house..then proceeded to fall asleep on the floor. Well truthfully I wasn't very tired so I just layed there with my eyes closed trying to fall asleep..when my eyes began to feel a tad heavy something unusual and frightening occured...

Something began pulling my hair with its claws. Keep in mind, there was no cats or dogs...and I doubt it was a mouse, possible but there are sounds it made me to believe otherwise...so it began growling..or like a demon..kind of groaning..and I sensed it was doing it to scare me too. I could feel its feet and nails pulling my hair and poking at my scalp..it was enjoying that I was panicked yet paralyzed with fear..I wanted to open my eyes so badly..but what would I do? After about 2 minutes(that seemed like forever)it walked away..I could here tiny footsteps..anyway...could it have been a gnome?

That was definitely a gnome, you should be careful! Fortunately for you, that doesn't sound like the murderous garden variety of gnome, or you'd obviously be a gonner right now. But watch out, they all co-mingle. :unsure2:

I've done a bit of study, and they seem to have an aversion to cattle (generally speaking). So if you rub cow pies all over your person, it should act as an effective repellent. If you don't do that... sleep only in high places where they can't get to you. Buy a bunk bed and booby-trap the bottom bunk.

I'm just thankful that you survived this first encounter. Wow, it sends chills down my spine to think of how close you came to a gruesome end. :cry:

Hang in there mate. And check under the couch before you sit down. You don't want one to hamstring ya. ;)

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JonathanVonErich

Ozzy

I have seen the Video of a Gnome in Argentina and i have to say it's very interesting. Here's the link to the video if some people want to see it:

The witness is credible but maybe it's a hoax, it's hard to tell. However i still think the video is interesting, so thank you for the tip.

And even if we joke about the topic i still respect your sighting and hope you will find the answers to your questions.

Edited by JonathanVonErich

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-WOLF-12227-

one word. Nuclear bombs. WE cannot be to safe against them, and we must rid this planet of them with the rightous fires of nuclear weaponry!

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arglebargle

fbdcd7d6-c2cf-4baa-9f5e-c48f2e24d221.jpg

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

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~TheBigK~

Just watch the first few minutes. This is the kind of thing they do while you're asleep, trash yards and blame it on neighborhood children. Tsk tsk.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-6c8Y9h5Nx0

And it's super creepy that it's actual people dressed as them.

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JonathanVonErich

Well at least the cops busted that one before he went too far. I think he was arrested for raping a grand-mother, stealing her underwear and then for stealing all the cookies from the cookie jar.

gnome7.jpg

It looks like he is wearing a cast on his left leg.

Edited by JonathanVonErich

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Master Oku

Oy... no more Gnomes <_< ...

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booNyzarC

Well at least the cops busted that one before he went too far. I think he was arrested for raping a grand-mother, stealing her underwear and then for stealing all the cookies from the cookie jar.

Must you really be so disturbingly graphic in these depictions? I mean... really JVE... that is pretty extreme... :blink:

gnome7.jpg

It looks like he is wearing a cast on his left leg.

To counter the previous (graphic) conjecture... This particular gnome actually attacked me. It was really a bit of luck which allowed me to escape unscathed, because he truly had me dead to rights. I had tripped over a sculpture of a garden frog and he was almost ready to do me in when he slipped on the water that had splashed out of the pond that the frog sculpture fell into.

I'd like to tell a more heroic story, but really he just slipped and broke his leg. Fortunately for me!

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cluey

yes!!!...god forbid......the blood sucking midnight adventuring Zombies get more front page news than the blood sucking midnight adventuring Gnomes :blink:

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Donnie  Darko

Well I wasn't necessarily looking for a direct answer about my experience...I was just wondering what people know about them...besides them being the bud of jokes lol. But perhaps for another time. Thanks for the replies anyway, much appreciated. ;)

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xYlvax

LOL garden gnomes that attack

It'll be a movie soon :ph34r:

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JonathanVonErich

Sorry if I have offended some people with my last post.

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booNyzarC

Sorry if I have offended some people with my last post.

You didn't offend me JVE, just thought it was a bit extreme is all. :)

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JonathanVonErich

Here is a very shocking picture showing a Garden Gnomes revolution in Germany. The picture was taken via Cellphone, the man who took the picture commited himself to a mental institution. I think the golden one was in charge.

After the Revolution the Gnomes took all the cookies from the cookie jar and stole hundreds of underwears.

image5383491.jpg

Sorry, I have fun doing stuff like that. The topic deserve to go on.

Edited by JonathanVonErich

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Badradness

ROOOOOFLE that video was omg awesome! :w00t:

I'm gonna buy like 50 of those things and train them and have my own little unit of Gnomes to patrol my yard. :yes:

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questionmark

Tis all the fault of the Garden Gnome Liberation Force, another of these French Liberté, Fraternité, Equalité liberal shenanigans!

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S2F

So if you rub cow pies all over your person, it should act as an effective repellent.

Cow feces is actually a pretty good deterrant for just about everything. Exept killer dung beetles, but you just have to weight the risk vs. rewards I suppose. ^_^

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Rocketgirl33

OMG! I was reading this old post yesterday and some more on dreams. Well...I had the stupidest dream lastnight!! Why I read this stiff I will never know...

So in my dream a Garden Gnome was trying to kill me! He was hella creepy too! He was grunting and waddleing around looking for me in my house. I kept hiding behind the pictures on the wall and under the bed and the couch. I was so scared he was going to find me!! When I woke up I was still feeling creeped out so I let the dogs in. If that evil little buggar comes back I will be ready for him this time!! :w00t: 8 dogs will tear him stubby limb from stubby limb!!

Rocketgirl B)

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Grandpa Greenman

:w00t:

I have seen some gnome footage.. lessee, here we go. On youtube (very scary!!!).

OMGs that was funny... Thanks.

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Rocketgirl33

I have seen some gnome footage.. lessee, here we go. On youtube (very scary!!!).

That is way funny! Just like in my dream!! Gnomes everywhere!!I don't like that they won the dog over though, so you with dogs might want to keep them inside and make sure the Gnomes don't try to recruit them!

Rocketgirl B)

(my favorite one is still the date rape gnome! Gnome means Gnome!)

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SirRedeye

aaaawww- first zombies, now gnomes...

oh well,i guess ill have to dig the golfclubs outta the closet now :devil:

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Lilly

Personally speaking, I prefer using a baseball bat...and my dogs are definitely on my team (we loves one another :wub: ).

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