Dad shoots laptop

[meryt-tetisheri]

Because like I said before, many teenagers are moody, self-absorbed, sacks of hormones. There isn't an instant transition for most to go from ME ME ME (infant to young child) to mature admiration, respect, and love for others, before myself (a mature adult). It's a transition that takes time; some faster than others. I think you can get your head around it; just doesn't sound as proper to admit.

People here dipping into a frenzy on the morals of teenagers, when the point of the story was to be about the wackiness of shooting up a laptop.

I agree with you that it is 'wacky' to shoot the laptop, it's a self-defeating act. However, at best, the moodiness of teenagers might be an explanation; definitely not an acceptable excuse for the daughter's behavior. We all have to do chores which we do not always like, that's real life and responsible parents must prepare their children for it. Whether they are happy or grumpy about it, children & teenagers have to learn about cooperation, duty & responsibility otherwise their parents would be selfish if they trade the education of their children for momentary peace and quite or escaping the occasional nag. It is not just about respect or a sense of decency, but also fairness, a house is the home of all the family members, so all are expected to contribute to its upkeep to varying degrees, parents AND children, according to his/her ability.

Lastly, it is not 'normal' for anyone, teenager or not, to resort to back stabbing. I used to tell my children (my youngest is 22, not that long ago when she too was a teenager) that there are two kinds of people worms & eagles: either one stands up for one's convictions and fight for it; or slithers in the mud & dark. It takes longer 'headachy' hours of arguments and counter-arguments (and the occasional "because I said so") but it keeps things and people honest, and this is very important. The daughter addressed her 'message' to her parents, she wasn't merely venting about how boring it is to do chores, yet she did it behind their back. In my book this adds cowardice to the disrespect and insulting language she used. Having rampaging hormones is no excuse for 'small' behavior and bad manners!

[Beckys_Mom]

I wonder who does the grocery shopping...which I hate. I couldn't imagine doing it for four. Does she have things on the list she wants picked up because she likes them? It wouldn't take but just a minute, because her Mother is already there picking up other things...so why not? Who carries those things in and puts them away? Who makes dinner probably every night? Who takes her shopping when she needs new clothes? Does her Mother hate shopping as much as I do and the last thing in the world she want to do is stand around while the kid tries on clothes for two hours? I would hope a child of mine would hate shopping as much as I do, but she could have turned out like my husband. She's fifteen...who drives her where she wants to go and picks her up?

Really goo points you raise there Michelle..

I do not think those that are in favour of the teenager will care to think of those things.. Too many take those things for granted and think it is how it should be

I too hate shopping.. it is a pain in the butt ...But someone has to do it lol

It sounds to me as if both parents were at the end of their rope and no amount of communication was working.

Yes I think this could well be the case... Some parents wuldnt even give second chances... We also know that some parents would likely lash out and hurt the kid more than the laptop... Not too many care to think of that either

[Michelle]

Really goo points you raise there Michelle..

I do not think those that are in favour of the teenager will care to think of those things.. Too many take those things for granted and think it is how it should be

I too hate shopping.. it is a pain in the butt ...But someone has to do it lol

Yes I think this could well be the case... Some parents wuldnt even give second chances... We also know that some parents would likely lash out and hurt the kid more than the laptop... Not too many care to think of that either

When I moved away from home at seventeen I was amazed at how often I ran out of shampoo, soap, deodorant and toothpaste. I never had to think about things like that before. And food...my Mother came to my apartment and basically all I had was ramen noodles, bologna, cheese, bread and mustard. She came back a little while later with a load of groceries...all of my favorites.

Yeah, it doesn't sound like this girl has been abused at all. She doesn't know how bad it could be.

[Beckys_Mom]

When I moved away from home at seventeen I was amazed at how often I ran out of shampoo, soap, deodorant and toothpaste. I never had to think about things like that before. And food...my Mother came to my apartment and basically all I had was ramen noodles, bologna, cheese, bread and mustard. She came back a little while later with a load of groceries...all of my favorites.

Your mom still looking out for you a little lol My mom used to phone me up asking if I had enough to live on? That sort of thing, for she knew it was going to be tough at the start..

I moved out at 22, and it hit me like a ton of bricks.... I got a shock when I see I had bills to pay, food to buy and do all for myself, including finding my own transport..... I got used to it because I knew how to cook and clean, but the rest that followed ohh man ...To think I had it in my head - Great, I will move into my own place, I can do what I want, when I want and party...I got a shock when I saw it wasn't as easy as I thought....I got used to it and begun to like it in the end...I learned how to budget money and worked out my own system...

[glorybebe]

Really goo points you raise there Michelle..

I do not think those that are in favour of the teenager will care to think of those things.. Too many take those things for granted and think it is how it should be

I too hate shopping.. it is a pain in the butt ...But someone has to do it lol

Yes I think this could well be the case... Some parents wuldnt even give second chances... We also know that some parents would likely lash out and hurt the kid more than the laptop... Not too many care to think of that either

That is so true! The dad didn't use physical violence against here, I know some parents would have swatted her ****.

[Kazahel]

Until they paid for their own 'toys' and access to what the toys offered, they got no privacy and i offer no apologies

Well the father in this video thinks she is old enough for a job. So she should be old enough to be given some privacy. To use that line of "when you are paying for the bills blah blah blah" I think is just a cheap copout and an excuse to satisfy a parents own paranoid curiosity. If you have raised your children well you shouldnt be thinking that you have to read their diaries inorder to know what they are up to.

If she wanted to make it for him herself, of course it's not a chore.

If he tells her she needs to do it every day, and she doesn't like doing it, but does because she has to, it's a chore. Like doing the laundry, mowing the lawn, taking out the trash, etc. Daily chores are rarely difficult; so just because it is easy and quick doesn't make it not a routine household task (chore).

Good post! Good points yes I agree you are correct!! (sorry just trying to fit in with how some posters seem to act. lol.)

But yeah thats pretty much what I think.

I wonder who does the grocery shopping...which I hate. I couldn't imagine doing it for four. Does she have things on the list she wants picked up because she likes them? It wouldn't take but just a minute, because her Mother is already there picking up other things...so why not? Who carries those things in and puts them away? Who makes dinner probably every night? Who takes her shopping when she needs new clothes? ...

who drives her where she wants to go and picks her up?

Someone said these were good points but I think it was pointless.

You dont know who does the cooking or the shopping.. it could be their other teenager for all you know(if they have one).. or maybe even her. Maybe the kids have to walk 9 miles in the snow to do the shopping and to go to school etc and to buy their own clothes( hey I can say that.. I mean we are working with what if's now arnt we). So the paragraph above imo didnt have any good points at all.

Yes, the story is about the Father coming to the end of his rope and blowing the crap out of his daughters laptop.

Umm actually the father said he was very close to shooting the laptop the first time she did something similar to this(whatever that was). So I wouldnt think of that as being at the end of his rope so much.. more like at the beginning, which is actually kinda scary.

So yeah some people are focusing on the daughter and some are focusing on the father. But who teaches who? Who is supposed to be the adult and who is supposed to be teaching respect. If the daughter doesnt show it why not? So some seem to praise the father for getting revenge on the daughter for not showing respect, instead of understanding that the daughter is a product of her father....

I think in the end the father was just embarrassed at losing the control over his daughter which he seems to really enjoy(like a power trip). So he used his most powerful thing to try keep her in control. A gun. A weapon used to kill man(unless thats a hunting pistol?..). So yeah.

Edited February 14, 2012 by Kazahel

[glorybebe]

Well the father in this video thinks she is old enough for a job. So she should be old enough to be given some privacy. To use that line of "when you are paying for the bills blah blah blah" I think is just a cheap copout and an excuse to satisfy a parents own paranoid curiosity. If you have raised your children well you shouldnt be thinking that you have to read their diaries inorder to know what they are up to.

Good post! Good points yes I agree you are correct!! (sorry just trying to fit in with how some posters seem to act. lol.)

But yeah thats pretty much what I think.

Someone said these were good points but I think it was pointless.

You dont know who does the cooking or the shopping.. it could be their other teenager for all you know(if they have one).. or maybe even her. Maybe the kids have to walk 9 miles in the snow to do the shopping and to go to school etc and to buy their own clothes( hey I can say that.. I mean we are working with what if's now arnt we). So the paragraph above imo didnt have any good points at all.

Umm actually the father said he was very close to shooting the laptop the first time she did something similar to this(whatever that was). So I wouldnt think of that as being at the end of his rope so much.. more like at the beginning, which is actually kinda scary.

So yeah some people are focusing on the daughter and some are focusing on the father. But who teaches who? Who is supposed to be the adult and who is supposed to be teaching respect. If the daughter doesnt show it why not? So some seem to praise the father for getting revenge on the daughter for not showing respect, instead of understanding that the daughter is a product of her father....

I think in the end the father was just embarrassed at losing the control over his daughter which he seems to really enjoy(like a power trip). So he used his most powerful thing to try keep her in control. A gun. A weapon used to kill man(unless thats a hunting pistol?..). So yeah.

And how is that any different than the laws of the land? If kids don't repect their parent's rules, what makes you think they are going to respect the law? And what happens when they don't respect the law? I would rather my child learn young to repect rules than to have her do something because she thought she was entitled to do it since she never had to listen at home.

[Kazahel]

And how is that any different than the laws of the land? If kids don't repect their parent's rules, what makes you think they are going to respect the law?.

Maybe the kids might respect the rules more if given more respect and shown respect. Shooting a laptop isnt showing any.

I also want to add about the swearing at home. I think its not a bad thing for kids to learn about swearing. When they get out in the real world they will have to deal with it and learn when it can be used and when it shouldnt be. Swearing is a part of life and I think keeping kids in the dark or trying to pretend it doesnt exist is not helpful. Of course I dont like it if my son swears all the time but guess what.. he doesnt.. because he has learned about it. He doesnt swear to teachers or anyone else because he knows its not what you do. He is polite and well mannered but he is also allowed to have a bite in his speech. I let him swear around me if he likes.. to me it is not a big deal and I like to see how he is learning about it.

So I am glad he has learned it/learning it. He has that part of speech at his disposal now. It has given him more freedom and has given him the choice on if he wants to use it and when and where. So I would rather have a child that is allowed to swear but doesnt, than have a child who is not allowed but does.

Also I feel I should add(because most people will assume the worst)that my son is considered gifted. He is in the top 2% with his schooling and has been invited to go to a gifted school program(again this year)that only the top 2% are chosen to go to. And thats not because I tell him to not to do things.. its because I spent the time teaching(in my own way)about things.

Edited February 14, 2012 by Kazahel

[Michelle]

I also want to add about the swearing at home. I think its not a bad thing for kids to learn about swearing. When they get out in the real world they will have to deal with it and learn when it can be used and when it shouldnt be. Swearing is a part of life and I think keeping kids in the dark or trying to pretend it doesnt exist is not helpful. Of course I dont like it if my son swears all the time but guess what.. he doesnt.. because he has learned about it. He doesnt swear to teachers or anyone else because he knows its not what you do. He is polite and well mannered but he is also allowed to have a bite in his speech. I let him swear around me if he likes.. to me it is not a big deal and I like to see how he is learning about it.

So I am glad he has learned it/learning it. He has that part of speech at his disposal now. It has given him more freedom and has given him the choice on if he wants to use it and when and where. So I would rather have a child that is allowed to swear but doesnt, than have a child who is not allowed but does.

I know what you mean...I like for the kids in my life to learn about drugs and use them in front of me to make sure they use them correctly. Not enough and they don't get a good buzz...too much they'll OD. They don't use drugs on school grounds, because they know that's no the place to get wasted...they at least have that much respect. They are polite and know how to hide that aspect of their personality, as most high-powered, corporate people do, so they will fit in nicely. They will be on top of their game when the rich clients comes in looking to be hooked up.

[Mistydawn]

If you want to teach your daughter to respect you, to do chores because she is part of a team and because you love/she loves,; if you want her to to share and talk about problems between you................... don't take a gun and fire it at her belongings.

[Beckys_Mom]

And how is that any different than the laws of the land? If kids don't repect their parent's rules, what makes you think they are going to respect the law? And what happens when they don't respect the law? I would rather my child learn young to repect rules than to have her do something because she thought she was entitled to do it since she never had to listen at home.

Good post

To add my own part to this, and not aim it any anyone in particular just in general to give an over all outlook

Anyone that can put down a father or other parents like him ( parents that can do the odd crazy stunt ). like in the OP... peg him the bad guy, make him out like he is a bad father, and claim he should teach respect etc Why? Answer - He shot a laptop, how does this teach respect? Answer is it doesn't...

But see should this man or anyone like him be judged on that one thing? ........... Can anyone safely say they have done everything right in their lives? ........... Never made any mistakes, even with kids over time?

Can anyone say that they should be judged over all on slip ups and mistakes they made over time? ........... Even if they made some past mistakes with kids and so forth? ............. I know I sure wouldn't...No parent likes to be judged over all over a few things they may have done wrong, and no one likes to be judged on one or two things they may have done in the past or a few more.. We all make mistakes ..

As for the girl and other kids like her... Yea she was judged on her disrespect, bad language and how she went about what she did... But in the end...She could have made it up to her dad again... For all we know, they both could be getting over it and making amends..Yes this is an assumption or a maybe thrown in, based on how I would have made friends with my folks as a teen........I think a lot of us have done made up for what we did and so on..... We don't know how the father and daughter really are

On my own behalf - ..I am not going to further make judgements on the daughter, I have judged her on what she did and how she did it, as have a few of us...But I will not take that further, as I feel there is nothing left for me to say...I cannot judge her on anything else or peg her an over all bad person.

.For all I know she could have made it up to him and he made it up to her, we don't know I base that on knowing many family's will argue and fall out and make up again...... ...... I also do not think it is fair to make this father look bad over shooting a laptop, I know parents out there do a lot worse to their kids and then some........So I am not going to judge the father on not knowing how to teach respect all because he shot a laptop, for all I know he may well have done his best to teach respect in other ways..... Judging his parenting skills on how to teach respect is a bit much too over one thing he did... No parent would like that..... Everyone makes mistakes and none of us are that perfect.....I speak for myself on this too

Edited February 15, 2012 by Beckys_Mom

[glorybebe]

You know, as long as you love your child and are trying your hardest that is the main thing. Yes we all make mistakes. Everyone does end up judging others. That hardest part is people saying you are wrong and horrible for spanking your child and they haven't seen you with your child. What really gets me is when those same people don't have kids. I won't accept disrespect from my daughter and I will not fail her and send her out in the world unprepared for life's lessons. When my daughter walks up to me and hugs me, tells me she loves me, that is all that matters. She is 12 years old and not embarassed to hold my hand walking down the street. Obviously I did something right.

[willowdreams]

You know, as long as you love your child and are trying your hardest that is the main thing. Yes we all make mistakes. Everyone does end up judging others. That hardest part is people saying you are wrong and horrible for spanking your child and they haven't seen you with your child. What really gets me is when those same people don't have kids. I won't accept disrespect from my daughter and I will not fail her and send her out in the world unprepared for life's lessons. When my daughter walks up to me and hugs me, tells me she loves me, that is all that matters. She is 12 years old and not embarassed to hold my hand walking down the street. Obviously I did something right.

*sigh* I do wish there was a 'like' button!

[wittyusernamefailed]

While I say "Good Job" on being a parent that doesn't let their kid get away with being a brat; giving the computer to charity would have been a more mature, adultish thing to do.

[Englishgent]

Well I know one thing for certain. If I was this girls father, I would not be asking her to make me any more cups of coffee. Never know what might be going in there along with the coffee

[Beckys_Mom]

You know, as long as you love your child and are trying your hardest that is the main thing. Yes we all make mistakes. Everyone does end up judging others. That hardest part is people saying you are wrong and horrible for spanking your child and they haven't seen you with your child. What really gets me is when those same people don't have kids. I won't accept disrespect from my daughter and I will not fail her and send her out in the world unprepared for life's lessons. When my daughter walks up to me and hugs me, tells me she loves me, that is all that matters. She is 12 years old and not embarassed to hold my hand walking down the street. Obviously I did something right.

That was beautifully said .... I am with willow on this, if only there was a LIKE button

I do not understand how anyone can throw out judgements on one or two things done over time... too many like to do that though, and it is sad in my opinion, because I know they would not like it done on to them over one or two things... No parent likes to be judged

Your daughter knows you will not accept any disrespect and still she thinks you are her world and loves you to bits... My daughter is the exact same...

Edited February 16, 2012 by Beckys_Mom

[glorybebe]

That was beautifully said .... I am with willow on this, if only there was a LIKE button

I do not understand how anyone can throw out judgements on one or two things done over time... too many like to do that though, and it is sad in my opinion, because I know they would not like it done on to them over one or two things... No parent likes to be judged

Your daughter knows you will not accept any disrespect and still she thinks you are her world and loves you to bits... My daughter is the exact same...

We are lucky, very lucky....

*sigh* I do wish there was a 'like' button!

That would be a cool idea!