Jump to content
Join the Unexplained Mysteries community today! It's free and setting up an account only takes a moment.
- Sign In or Create Account -

"Random Thoughts from a Woman"


Recommended Posts

Random Thoughts from a Woman

1) Reason to smile: Every 7 minutes of every day, someone in an aerobics class pulls a hamstring.

2) Women over 50 don't have babies because they would put them down and forget where they left them.

3) One of life's mysteries is how a 2 pound box of candy can make a woman gain 5 LBS. huh.gif

4) My mind not only wanders, it sometimes leaves completely.

5) The best way to forget all your troubles is to wear tight shoes.

6) The nice part about living in a small town is that when you don't know what you're doing, someone else does. tongue.gif

7) The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight because by then, your body and your fat are really good friends. tongue.gif

8) Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.

9) Sometimes I think I understand everything, then I regain consciousness.

10) I gave up jogging for my health when my thighs kept rubbing together and setting my pantyhose on fire. w00t.gif

11) Amazing! You hang something in your closet for a while and it shrinks two sizes! tongue.gif

12) Skinny people irritate me! Especially when they say things like, "You know sometimes I just forget to eat," Now I've forgotten my address, my mother's maiden name, and my keys. But I've never forgotten to eat. You have to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat. blink.gif

13) A friend of mine confused her Valium with her birth control pills. She had 14 kids, but she doesn't really care. grin2.gif

14) They keep telling us to get in touch with our bodies. Mine isn't all that communicative but I heard from it the other day after I said, "Body, how'd you like to go to the six o'clock class in vigorous toning?" Clear as a bell my body said, "Listen witch ... do it and die." ohmy.gif

15) The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing (and then they marry him.) laugh.gif

16) I read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, impulse buying, and driving too fast. Are they kidding? That is my idea of a perfect day. thumbsup.gif

17) I know what Victoria's Secret is. The secret is that nobody older than 30 can fit into their stuff. disgust.gif

18) If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a noose around your neck? wink2.gifwhistling2.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 10
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • Daughter of the Nine Moons


  • AliceCoopersGirl


  • Tia


  • earthygirl04


Top Posters In This Topic

laugh.gif Earthygirl that made my day!

4) My mind not only wanders, it sometimes leaves completely.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Number 6,that goes really well in my local pub huh.gifw00t.gifw00t.gif

Number 18,that is sooo true. blink.giflaugh.giflaugh.gif

Thanks Earthygirl,they are all great thumbsup.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites


And i take it then that all women have this song going through their heads all day long?

"Rain drops keep fallin on my head..."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Tia  Today, 07:38 AM Post #3 


thumbup.gif  So many of those fit me, I don't know whether to  laugh.gif  or  crying.gif  .

Me too! "lol" I know what you mean! sad.gif I know 11 that fit me, and that's kinda sad since there's only 18 there!! crying.giftongue.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

hehe, as an empathetic male I enjoyed this list and am sending it to my wife, giving due credit of course. lol thanks for putting that up!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.