I'm Scared...Help!

[pisceanheart]

(EDIT: I made this shorter so that it is simple and to the point.)

I think I got into a situation that I should not have gotten into.

John and I are artists. Tony wanted to start an arts festival, but did not know many artists. Since we were artists, he felt we could help him fill a space that he rented out for this event with as many artists as possible. He wanted vendors who sold other products as well. For the first year, he said he did not want there to be a fee for vendors. His plan was to build it up the first year.

Although I don't like taking on many other projects with other people, I saw that he had a good heart and he was desperate to make something happen. After all, he had invested $10,000 in this. So I agreed to help. Not too shortly afterward, I made posts to spread the word about the event we were putting together and made it known that booths would be free with no commission, as he wanted. I rounded up many potential artists off of this basis. Many of them did not have much money to spend on vending space for an event that was not guaranteed to be a success.

To make a long story short, John added another person onto the team and made her in charge of Tony's event. We will call her Sara. She made huge (some uneducated) rules that I know would hurt the event. It would force others to go back on their word, turn vendors off and make the first event turn out bad.

She is also working very slowly. Is hard to get a hold of and does not communicate unprompted. I also feel that she makes plans without making everyone aware as soon as possible, has ulterior motives and is lying about a couple of things.

My questions:

-Am I just overreacting?

-What will become of our poor planning and my poor people skills?

-Will this hurt John and I's business relationship, for not agreeing with the way Sara did things?

Edited September 21, 2012 by pisceanheart

[tinkerbellekisses]

Hey hunni I would be more than happy to give you a tarot reading but I may not be able to answer all your questions I will only base the reading on career and see what the cards bring up for you.

Is that ok?

[+joc]

pisceanheart,

Go to John. Tell him what you told us in your post. Tell him you think...Sara...is going to spoil the whole affair.

Once, a long time ago, I got hired for a job. The first day I was there I was told to go to the back of the warehouse. The Manager and some others were trying to figure out what to do with a 55 gallon cardboard barrel of glue that was leaking at the bottom of the barrel. The manager decided that they should push it over and dump all of the glue into a heavy duty plastic bag. I instinctively knew that the barrel was going to split at the bottom and disaster would follow. I did not speak up and of course...the barrel broke. I have always regretted not speaking up about that.

Listen to your heart!

[bLu3 de 3n3rgy]

To make a long story short, John added another person onto the team and made her in charge of Tony's event. We will call her Sara. She made huge (some uneducated) rules that I know would hurt the event. It would force others to go back on their word, turn vendors off and make the first event turn out bad.

She is also working very slowly. Is hard to get a hold of and does not communicate unprompted. I also feel that she makes plans without making everyone aware as soon as possible, has ulterior motives and is lying about a couple of things.

My questions:

-Am I just overreacting?

If you and John are business partners, did John consult you about taking Sara on? if not, then that has to be addressed and is your way in to pull John up about this. You can't have a business partner who does things without discussing things like that with you. And no body new coming in should be given so much responsibility that it can jeopardise your entire business venture if they mess up. If there is evidence that sara may cause this kind of damage, then you have to be the boss and limit/change the responsibility and role she's playing.

Edited September 22, 2012 by bLu3 de 3n3rgy

[pisceanheart]

John and I aren't business partner's, we just have a business relationship where we barter our services. I think that he and Sara have known each other longer. I told him about how I felt, but he shot my feelings down. All he said was, "Just leave it to Sarah because she knows what she is doing and forget the other guy (Tony)."

He has a very passive personality where instead of taking leadership roles, he just gets others to do it while he works in the background. I also think he does this so that he can have more time to work on other things. Sara has also planned events for him in the past as well. He has a lot of trust in her and has a certain level of dependency on her. It is because of these things that she is on a higher level compared to mine, in his eyes.

However, the update to this story is that I ended up backing out of being apart of this event. I realize that I care more about having inner peace than maintaining a business relationship, if this situation will affect it. I feel that this messy situation in putting this together has hurt my reputation though. Has it?

As I take a look back at it, I see that I was naive when it came to this situation in many ways and I learned much from it:

-I failed to research the man who paid to have this event. It turns out that he has a not so good public history. Something told me that maybe he had changed into a good guy after I found out, but there were little warning signs that popped up that made me decide to stay away.

-There was a lot of miscommunication with Sara and others, due to my poor people skills.

-There are a lot of things about myself that I need to work on.

-If something does not feel right, back out of it.

Edited October 9, 2012 by pisceanheart

[White Crane Feather]

I wish I got to this before.

There are seriously some conflict of interests in this scenario. Your friend should have offered the first event for free, then during the event got them to comit to a monthly payment of x dollars on an automatic billing system that added up to their full fee for the next one. This would allow those who did not have cash to pay for it early in small increments. $20/month for next years event adds up to a $240 fee. This would provide revenue to set up the next event without out of pocket costs, a monthly income above what was expected to be used for the next event, and the ability to still offer it free for first timers the next year, and build a large clientele based on trust and mutual success.

This other person dies not have an investment, and should not be makeing decisions. Only through giving and looking out for your clientele can a service provider be successful. Trust me...,

[sickpuppy]

it sounds like first of all, when you were in charge, the whole thing was about getting the event launched, the priority was not on money...

..it sounds like this new organizer who moved in, (sara?) somehow put the idea in his head "what do you mean you're not expecting any money out of this? look, if you do this my way you can have <insert spiel here>"

???

either that or she's bangin' him... life is usually pretty simple like this...

it seems like you should incorporate some of her methodology into your own actions... not to be a b**** like she sounds like,, but hey, she somehow managed to work her way into that guy, didn't she? ...something she has was able to undermine what you did?

let us know how it turns out?

[edit]

i'm in a similar situation... sitting on 5 grand.. not sure what to do with it... put it all into preps or do something with my art? i still think the S will HTF.. and how is a painting going to help anyone in that?? (see, i'm scared too)

Edited October 9, 2012 by unit

[pisceanheart]

I don't think they were messing around.

Sara ended up not responding to many of the vendors because she did not want them in it, which made me look bad since I was the one who rounded them up. In addition, she had a communication issue with another vendor and the vendor felt disrespected. So she basically ruined all of my hard work that I did for free and got paid while doing it.

Everything that I said would happen end up happening. The event was a flop. There weren't enough vendors to keep people engaged. If the creator ever wants to do this event again, he is going to have a hard time finding sponsors because it didn't have a good turn out the first time around. If he ever thinks about contacting me to help organize for next year, my help will not be there.

I am no longer sympathetic for Tony for being deceitful and not keeping his word.

I learned my lesson and I think I will just keep to myself from now on. In addition, I should work on my communication skills too.

People can get really vicious when they see an opportunity to make money. I HATE that.

Edited October 18, 2012 by pisceanheart

[Beany]

John and I aren't business partner's, we just have a business relationship where we barter our services. I think that he and Sara have known each other longer. I told him about how I felt, but he shot my feelings down. All he said was, "Just leave it to Sarah because she knows what she is doing and forget the other guy (Tony)."

He has a very passive personality where instead of taking leadership roles, he just gets others to do it while he works in the background. I also think he does this so that he can have more time to work on other things. Sara has also planned events for him in the past as well. He has a lot of trust in her and has a certain level of dependency on her. It is because of these things that she is on a higher level compared to mine, in his eyes.

However, the update to this story is that I ended up backing out of being apart of this event. I realize that I care more about having inner peace than maintaining a business relationship, if this situation will affect it. I feel that this messy situation in putting this together has hurt my reputation though. Has it?

As I take a look back at it, I see that I was naive when it came to this situation in many ways and I learned much from it:

-I failed to research the man who paid to have this event. It turns out that he has a not so good public history. Something told me that maybe he had changed into a good guy after I found out, but there were little warning signs that popped up that made me decide to stay away.

-There was a lot of miscommunication with Sara and others, due to my poor people skills.

-There are a lot of things about myself that I need to work on.

-If something does not feel right, back out of it.

Common sense and critical thinking are usually far more valuable than a reading, and it sounds like you have a lot of it. That, along with your intuition, will serve you well.

[starchild1976]

I do think other women take advantage of you out of one part jealousy and one part laziness on their own part. Do not be afraid to shine! Some of the characteristics other females have tried to numb in you are the very ones you need to hold onto and embellish. Dress the way you want. I see an idea you have put in a box. Take it out and get it ready! But by pass anyone your gut tells you not to trust. And a new opportunity will arise soon! You are very intuitive like your grandmother who made preserves and cooked with and without a recipe. I see a fearless young woman who needs to just remember how much fun it was climbing trees!

These are simply my impressions.